Marketers do a great job of convincing us to buy stuff (often stuff we don’t need) – but through the annals of history they have occasionally gotten things wrong. This is a list of the ten most unfortunately named products.
10. Wii
This has to be included – perhaps the people that devised the name are not familiar with the fact that British English speakers (including most of the Commonwealth) refer to urine as “wee” – for example: “Ooh – I am busting for a wee!” Every time someone mentions a Wii I think of a wee. Crazy! “Let’s play with our wii” really takes on a whole new meaning when you speak British English.
9. Elephant Beautiful Balls
As The Leader in Innovative Billiards, Elephant Balls, Ltd. (EBL) offers a full range of billiard merchandise for the enthusiast at every level. From high quality pool tables and furniture to the most unique ball sets and effective training tools in the world, we have the perfect gift for even the person who has everything. [Of course - who the hell has Elephant balls?! Oh - well, except that Internet Meme squirrel that was passed around a while back.]
8. Gray Poupon
Grey Poupon is a Dijon mustard now made by Kraft Foods. It is currently the best-selling Dijon-style mustard in the United States. Thanks – but no thanks! Here is the original commercial:
7. Sars
This drink, made by Golden Circle unfortunately shares its name with the SARS (Severe acute respiratory syndrome) virus. There have been two pandemics of SARS reported in recent years. The drink is sarsaparilla flavored and is sold in all New Zealand supermarkets (and maybe in other countries where Golden Circle products are found).
6. Jussipussi
An “interesting” bread product by Finnish company primula. Frankly – I am speechless.
5. Kagome
Founded in 1899 by Ichitaro Kanie, a Japanese pioneer in tomato cultivation, Kagome has grown to become the largest producer of Japanese tomato products and a major producer of other fruit and vegetable foods. Unfortunately, in Portuguese and probably Spanish this sounds like “I shit myself”.
4. I.beat Blaxx
Need an mp3 player but don’t like the Apple range of iPods? Look no further than German company Trekstor who produce the I.beat Blaxx. At the time of publishing this article, Trekstor have renamed the black edition of the I.beat to just “Blaxx” – I wonder why.
3. Vagisil
Vagisil is a full line of feminine hygiene products made by Combe Incorporated. In 2007, Vagisil introduced the Vagisil Screening Kit. At least they get straight to the point I guess.
2. Anusol
Anusol is an over-the-counter medication that can be used to treat hemorrhoids (also known as piles). The Anusol range includes creams, ointments, and the popular (WTF!) suppository form of treatment. For those who may not be aware, suppositories are waxy objects you stick up your bum. Let’s hope you don’t need a price check on this one next time you are at the supermarket!
1. Ayds
Ayds (pronounced aids) was a diet candy from the 1980s. The NY Times (1982) reported that the active ingredient in AYDS was phenylpropanolamine – a substance the FDA has now ruled “not recognized as safe”. Here is a bonus – a truly cringe-worthy advert for Ayds:
Can’t get enough? Here is another.
Ashley – when I was last in Wellington (one year ago), New World was still selling SARS in the drinks aisle – it was sarsaparilla flavor – I wonder if they have finally renamed it because of the SARS outbreak.
Sorry, what I meant is that they have BOTH
I was just confused because since they have one called “sarsaparilla” and one called “SARS” … I guess they are both the same flavour?
What, no Nads? (depilatory wax)
What’s wrong with Jussipussi?
It’s really not that funny in Finnish. Ok, maybe we’re just weird in Finland.
Dandelion: maybe not funny in Finnish – but highly risque in English
dofnup: haha I had forgotten about that product! I have seen it on store shelves.
Ahsley: they must be because Sars is Sarsaparilla flavor.
The first time I saw Clamato (clam and tomato juice), I thought it sounded like a venereal disease…
http://www.clamato.com
Oh Cindy, I totaly agree about Clamato!
#6 is outrageous.
#6 hiiiiilarious! Kill me now, I’m dying, that is too funny!!
I remember first time I heard of “spotted dick” I thought some guy needed to get to a doctor fast!
Reminds me… Not sure if it’s around anymore, but not far from where I grew up, there was this local hamburger joint called “Doodie’s Diner” – I kid you not – and there was this elderly woman who would go there and order a “Doodie burger” (NOT actually on the menu). The carhops would look at her like she was crazy, but there they were, working at Doodie’s!
Luv The List, I Found Number 1 Hilarious!!
)
Haha…but what about RC cola? Gross
What about the drink called bawls and its sold in America and to top it off it is in a blue colored bottle. Hahaha blue bawls. I love the list hilarious!
Well, I’m from Argentina and a couple of years ago my boyfriend went to Mexico and saw a candy called “Dulce de cajeta”… The thing is that “cajeta” is another way to say vagina in our country… “Vagina Syrup”???? Gross!!
quite delectable actually
lol
btw that was a joke
I’m from Argentina and let me tell you that “KAGOME” in fact sounds like “i ***** myself” but kind of backwards. if it were MEKAGO it would mean “i ***** myself” but we have an habit of saying things like KAGOMEKAGOMEKAGOME so it could sound like “i ***** myself” i hope i express myself well. Sorry my written english isn’t so nice. Have a nice day, i loooooooove this web =D
in canada we have a clothing company called roots, which i understand is hilarious in australia.
sevenlies: when used as a verb, the word in Australia and NZ means the same as “to have *****” – but as a noun it is known in the same way as everywhere else – the bottom part of a tree or a persons heritage
well, we must look like right idiots walking around with ROOTS written proudly on our chests, then. especially when placed over a large image of a beaver.
um, the animal, not… you know.
sevenlies: haha that changes things a little
What’s bad about Grey Poupon?
We have, here in Belgium, in every city sandwich shops named “Panos”. It is in every shopping-area far out the most popular snackbar.
But Russians (they live mostly in Antwerp) don’t go inside.
Panos is Russian for “diarrheoa”
What about German lightbulbs producing company OSRAM? Let me cite the Polish Wikipedia on this:
“Because of the company’s name giving quite obvious connotations in Polish langauage, it has been (even since before II World War) the subject of not always subtle jokes and anecdotes. However, it seems that it hasn’t damaged the company’s image, it could be even a major contributing factor in making the brand widely recognised.”
In polish the verb “srać” means “to *****” and “osram” is one of its common forms meaning sth like “I shall ***** on (sth/sb)”. Hilarious, isn’t it?
cryndigo:
Look at it this way: Grey Poupon= GREY POOP ON…your sandwich.
Not too long ago the drugstore chain CVS had some perfume called Fuk Her. But they recently got rid of that one.
I would like to suggest Caronia Nail Polish: Passion for Color (if you ever heard of such a product). ahem… Okay, I’m not a girl, but I sure know that “caronia” is a vulgar Latin word meaning “carcass”, or dead body. That is actually the word where “carrion” came from.
carrion- [sense 1] decaying human flesh, especially when used as food by necrophagi (people who practice necrophagia, otherwise known as the consumption of decaying human flesh. For more info, see item no. 1 in top 10 bizarre eating habits.)
– [sense 2] anything very disgusting or repulsive
I don’t get the Vagisil one?
The wii is still cool though!
LOL #6 IS THE BEST
obviously the next generation of Nintendo console will be called the Puu.
I’m so happy Wii is on there! I have one, and everytime someone wants to play on it I force them to say “Please may I play with your wee?”
Never grows old!
I’ve got one to add to this…it’s an acid reflux product called Aciphex….pronounced “ass effects”
See the ad:
Dreamer101- good one!
Denzell- yup, I’ve heard of Caronia nail polish. In fact, I use it on my nails. You got me interested when you stated there that “caronia” is a Latin word for dead body. Really?
So I checked, and here’s the etymology of “carrion” from dictionary.com:
[Middle English careine, from Anglo-Norman, from Vulgar Latin *carōnia, from Latin carō, flesh; see sker-1 in Indo-European roots.]
btw, caronia is “flesh”, which may also be considered as “dead body.”
So, the stuff I’ve been putting on my nails is Vulgar Latin for flesh, especially the rotten one? OMG!
Aha, finally I understand what’s so funny about Jussipussi. We pronounce it so differently in finnish that it was hard to think of it from your point of view.
#4 made me laugh out loud. How could anyone come up with such a name?
Yeah, “Coolpis” is a good one. “Pocari Sweat” is not bad either. (google images no doubt has these)
“Hey look everyone, I’ve got Ayds!”
“Oh yeah? Well check this out! i.Beat.Blaxx!”
“Cool it, you two; let’s just go in and play with our Wii.”
Anusol
I would be afraid of picking it up.
I told my friends about Jussipussi, Ayds, and Anusol….they nearly died laughing.
The funniest were Grey Poupon (grey poop-on XD) and i.beat Blaxx.
I was over at my friends house the other day and I noticed that she had some Grey Poupon…i thought it was rather interesting…I dont know how she managed to find a bottle.
well instead of Wii 2 maybe they’ll just call the next one the weewee
Two British ones that the Americans find funny are
Spotted Dick – a sponge pudding.
Brains *****s – a kind of meatball.
find them on Google images
How fun was this list!! You all are too funny. I like the idea of Puu for the next Wii, too.
cool list dude, yea, i live in belfast(n.ireland) and they sell procari sweat at the asian supermarkets here; like most asian beverages it tastes more like ***** than sweat
Mineralwaters can hve quite interesting names too. Particularly considering that many of them are related to location names. “Golden Cock” “Bad Lad” etc.
I still don’t get it. What is so darn funny with Jussipussi?
Finn: Jussipussi – “Juicy pussy”.. Ei oo helppoa
This is in response to Angie’s comment, screamed out by K-chan “AND KAGOME DOESN’T EVNE WEAR PANTS!!!! Sorry Kagome-chan. Inuyasha don’t read this.” (That last part was more randomness by K-chan, she is on a high…be warned…SAVE YOURSELF! JOIN THE DARK SIDE! We have cookies.)
anime/manga lovers: http://www.freewebs.com/squadaau
mmmmmmm…jussipussi
Oh, I thought the Super Nova car was gonna be in this list…
here in Australia one of the main cheese brands is “coon” cheese, surely that must be up there
there is a product called monkey butt. Its rash oitment i like product names when they get right to the point
I’ve had a “golden gay time” icecream. A great name:-)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Golden_Gaytime
Ha! Just saw this one. You can include the Mitsubishi Pajero (pajero means literally “*****er” in Spanish – not the generic insult, but the actual verbal form of a masturbating person)
Sorry, not a verbal form (i’m in the middle of a verbs exercise and got muddled)- it means litterally a person who masturbates.
I fell out my chair laughing reading this list my fav is number 6. This is my fav list to date.
There’s a biscuit manufacturer in France called Gayelord
http://a308.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/72/l_c500d470a777653bb41e28d3d8850cdb.jpg
Well…”pussi” means “bag” in Finnish and “Jussi” is a common male name. Pussi might look a bit like pussy, but the pronounciation isn’t the exact same. The pronounciation for “pussy” could be written as “pusi” or “pusii” in Finnish.
I love Gaytimes! And SARS is short for Sarsparilla. We Aussies are so lazy with our speech that we like to shorten words as much as we can. I think NADS (hair remover) should have been in there too. And didn’t Ford once make the Ford Probe (in Australia perhaps)…?
In my spare time, I love to Wii. Friend calls up “what are you doing?” “I’m just Wii-ing.” LOL. Gross.