From time to time we need to shed a few pounds and for most people the solution is to reduce calorie intake – eat less than you burn and you are guaranteed to lose weight. This is the principle behind the reason that the majority of French people are slim: they eat butter, cream, chocolate, and other delicious things, but in small quantities. Unfortunately there is a lot of money to be made in diets and so we are surrounded by bizarre ideas for weight loss. This list looks at ten of the strangest diets around. We have only included diets which are widely-spread; this means that individuals with bizarre eating habits are not included (they will have their own list).
The macrobiotic diet is actually quite ancient. It involves eating grains as a staple food supplemented with other foodstuffs such as vegetables and beans, and avoiding the use of highly processed or refined foods. This is probably the least bizarre diet on the list, but it does have one noticeable quirk: some leaders in the field of macrobiotics advocate smoking for good health, claiming that it is the non-macrobiotic foods that cause cancer, not smoking. Michio Kushi, who introduced macrobiotics to the US, had surgery on his colon in 2004. His son said: “[I]n spite of years of his smoking, a fact well-known to many, recent x-rays of Michio’s lungs were surprisingly clean, like that of a twenty year old (remarked his physician)”.
The Cabbage soup diet is a radical weight loss diet designed around heavy consumption of a low-calorie cabbage soup over the time of seven days. The diet is actually surprisingly popular and has spawned a whole slew of similar fads. The origins of the diet are unknown but it gained popularity as a word of “faxlore” in the 1980s, because it spread virally through people sharing it via fax machines. The diet is almost universally condemned by doctors as it lacks any substantial nutrition and the weight loss it causes is mostly water-loss not fat-loss, and is, therefore, not permanent. Along with the cabbage soup recipe, the diet is usually touted as being used in hospitals to dramatically reduce weight in patients needing heart surgery; this is not true. Most people trying this diet lose energy and experience light-headedness. The most common side effect is flatulence – a lot of it.
This diet harkens back to the cavemen and their eating habits. It is based on the presumed ancient diet of wild plants and animals that various human species habitually consumed during the Paleolithic—a period of about 2.5 million years duration that ended around 10,000 years ago with the development of agriculture. Proponents of the diet say that paleolithic men were free of diseases known in modern times and, therefore, following their diet should keep us free from sickness. Centered around commonly available modern foods, the “contemporary” Paleolithic diet consists mainly of lean meat, fish, vegetables, fruit, roots, and nuts; and excludes grains, legumes, dairy products, salt, refined sugar, and processed oils. So now, from a diet based on evolution, to a diet based on creationism:
Fruitarianism is a diet of nothing but fruit, though some people whose diet is not 100% fruit, consider themselves fruitarian, if their diet is 75% or more fruit. Some fruitarians believe fruitarianism was the original diet of mankind in the form of Adam and Eve based on Genesis 1:29: “And God said: Behold I have given you every herb bearing seed upon the earth, and all trees that have in themselves seed of their own kind, to be your meat”. They believe that a return to an Eden-like paradise will require simple living and a holistic approach to health and diet. A fruitarian diet can cause deficiencies in calcium, protein, iron, zinc, vitamin D, most B vitamins (especially B-12), and essential fatty acids. Additionally, the Health Promotion Program at Columbia reports that food restrictions in general may lead to hunger, cravings, food obsessions, social disruptions and social isolation. Gandhi followed a fruit-only diet from time to time, but eventually gave it up due it being unsustainable. Now, if you didn’t think that was weird enough, how about the Bible Diet?
The Bible Diet (or Maker’s Diet) is based on the idea that certain foods are either forbidden (“unclean”) or acceptable (“clean”) to God. The main promoter of the Bible diet is Jordan S. Rubin, who claims that the diet was responsible for his recovery from Crohn’s disease at the age of 19. In 2004 the United States Food and Drug Administration ordered Rubin’s company, Garden of Life, Inc., to stop making unsubstantiated claims about eight of its products and supplements. The diet begins and ends each day with prayers of thanksgiving, healing, and petition. The individual should perform exercises of “Life Purpose” for two to five minutes before the day gets too stressful. To achieve the utmost spiritual benefits from the partial fast days, it is suggested to pray each time hunger is experienced. The diet is broken up into three phases. Phase One restricts meats such as pork, bacon, ostrich, ham, sausages, emu and imitation meat. Fish and sea foods such as fried fish, breaded fish, eel, shark, crab, clams, oyster, mussels, lobster, shrimp, scallops, and craw fish are prohibited.
For people who love to eat, the Shangri-La diet is a godsend. Basically, you can eat what you like. The principle behind this diet is that the body has a set point (the weight that it wants to sustain) and appetite is moderated by the body to ensure that you stay at your set point. The inventor of the diet, Seth Roberts, says that you can lower your set point using his method, thereby lowering appetite and eventually weight. The method? Every day you must drink 100-400 calories of extra light olive oil or sugar water in a two hour window in which you must experience no flavors (including cigarette smoke). It is the consumption of extra flavorless calories which supposedly lowers the set point. While there are some critics of the method (which earned Roberts a spot on the New York Times bestseller list), most doctors consider that the diet, while lacking scientific evidence, is benign. [Image copyright (c) Erik Sansom: source]
“Nature will castigate those who don’t masticate.” These are the words used by Horace Fletcher at the turn of the 20th century to market his new diet: Fletcherizing. In this diet, a person must chew each mouthful 32 times whilst keeping their head tilted forward. After the chewing is complete, the dieter tilts their head back, allowing the contents of their mouth to slide down the throat. Any food that did not naturally slip down, was to be spat out. In addition, Fletcher advocated chewing liquids, and said that one must not eat when angry or sad. Fletched died a millionaire at 69 – with the majority of his money having come from promoting his diet which was wildly popular.
Breatharianism consists of eating: nothing. That’s right, it is called Breatharianism because you are surviving on nothing but your breath. There are some elements of esotericism in this diet and some of practitioners believe that they are sustained by energy from the sun or a “vital life force” called prana. The Breatharian Institute of America promote the diet and offer a workshop to help you get started for the low price of just $10,000, which, according to their website: “is not a misprint”. These courses are run by Wiley Brooks who previously charged up to 25 million dollars for his courses. Occasionally Wiley eats a cheeseburger and a diet coke claiming that when he’s surrounded by junk culture and junk food, consuming them adds balance. At least three people have died whilst on this “diet”. If you have tried this diet and are not dead yet, be sure to tell us about it in the comments.
As its name implies, this diet involves sleep – a lot of it. The principle behind this diet is: “if you aren’t awake, you aren’t eating”. Consequently, advocates take heavy sedation and sleep for days at a time in order to lose weight. Obviously the diet works but it is such an unhealthy approach to weight loss that it is insane to try it. The diet was originally formulated in the 1970s and was reportedly popular with Elvis Presley who was beginning to have difficulty bending down to tie up his blue suede shoes.
This diet is as disgusting as its name. In this diet, you eat a tapeworm in a cyst and let it grow in your body until it is fully mature. You then worm yourself and poop out the worm. Advocates of this insane diet assure people that they can lose 1 – 2 pounds per week using their method. Because it is illegal to import tapeworms into the US, some organizations run tapeworm farms in Africa and Mexico which tourists can visit to get infected “safely”. On these farms, cows are intentionally infected with tapeworm for harvesting for human consumption. This diet is alleged to work because once ingested, the worm attaches in the intestinal tract and absorbs nutrients from the food you eat.
This is not so much a diet as a fast, so it is added as a bonus item. Under this program, developed by Dr. Robert Linn in the 1970s, people ate nothing at all. But several times a day the fast was broken by a small drink of the concoction that Linn had invented called Prolinn. It was a liquid protein that provided fewer than 400 calories a day, consisted of ground-up and crushed animal horns, hooves, hides, tendons, bones and other slaughterhouse byproducts that were treated with artificial flavors, colors and enzymes to break them down. [Source: CBC News]
Not all diet programs work for everybody but there are those that work for specific cases.

























July 15th, 2009 at 1:35 am
me, i don’t need any of these diets. haha.
nice list!
July 15th, 2009 at 1:36 am
I´d rather be fat, then go on any of these diets.
July 15th, 2009 at 1:39 am
First comment? ISTR that John Lennon was on a macrobiotic diet shortly before he died and he told interviewers that the macrobiotic diet didn’t think that smoking caused cancer; not sure George Harrison would have agreed with him
.
July 15th, 2009 at 1:40 am
Breatharianism is to diets what Scientology is to religion.
July 15th, 2009 at 1:40 am
Im morbidly obese… but have been following a brilliant diet and have started losing weight quite suddenly….its a high protein diet…
July 15th, 2009 at 1:45 am
I once dated a girl who in the midst of the relationship went vegan. In a sort of smug way she flaunted the restrictions of her diet domain. Taking this to the extreme she once argued with a doctor when he pronounced her NOT allergic to glutien (sp?). Glutton for punishment. I guess we both were, me for living with it.
July 15th, 2009 at 1:50 am
Cheesetaniarism: Eating lots of cheese.
July 15th, 2009 at 1:56 am
What ever happened to exercise? How many of these diets were made by Americans. I’m too lazy to look.
July 15th, 2009 at 2:01 am
The bonus Last Chance Diet nearly made me barf. Hold on that would work – every time I eat I read the part about crushed animal horns, hooves bones, I then barf and viloa the weight flys off.
July 15th, 2009 at 2:01 am
viola
July 15th, 2009 at 2:04 am
I once dated a girl who would drink a litre of pure lemmon juice before she ate anything in the morning. Apparently it would break her apetite and at the same time give her enough vitamins to go through the day with a low calorie diet.
We broke up cos she was weighing 90 pounds and I was just too afraid of breaking her… I like it rough in the sack!
July 15th, 2009 at 2:12 am
If people simply got educated on how their own bodies work, they could easily spot whether diets are sensible or just “money makers”. In fact, if they knew how their bodies worked they could probably work out their own diet for free.
July 15th, 2009 at 2:14 am
The Tapeworm diet is just nasty
July 15th, 2009 at 2:15 am
They say you lose 21 grams when you die…
There’s a solution for all you fat f*cks!! LOL
July 15th, 2009 at 2:16 am
I wonder if I’ll be alive when people learn about the true horror of carbohydrates and they finally get relegated to a position of snack, rather than food.
The Paleolithic diet is by far the most sustainable diet on this entire page, and is how people should be living. Carbohydrates are completely unessential for life.
July 15th, 2009 at 2:22 am
Whatever happened to good ol’ self control and exercise?
July 15th, 2009 at 2:30 am
This is a great list. I knew about the last one, but my Aunt got infected with a parasite when she ate so bad sushi and lost 120 pounds! She weighed 245 pounds before! And by the way….I’m on the all liquid diet. Wish me luck!
July 15th, 2009 at 2:31 am
oops! some bad sushi no so bad sushi. I really need to proof-read.
July 15th, 2009 at 2:32 am
sorry did it again….i give!
July 15th, 2009 at 2:34 am
last chance diet & tapeworm diet are just gross..breatharianism is just weird..sleeping beauty diet is absurd..i quite like some fruitarianism sometime today..a little fletcherizing won’t hurt i guess (proper eating/chewing habits)..cabbage diet is really unhealthy.. macrobiotic diet is bizaare..
another great list!
*two thumbs-up!*
July 15th, 2009 at 2:41 am
they say you lose 300 calories with each good session of sex…
@Travis( no.13 ) you should look me up ;D
July 15th, 2009 at 2:46 am
What about the “metabolism diet”? It claims that it increases your metabolism. You have to follow a very specific diet plan for 13 days, it’s usually something like “breakfast: a cup of coffee with sugar” and “lunch: two hard-boiled eggs”. Pretty crazy, if you ask me.
July 15th, 2009 at 2:52 am
@egernunge (24): is that the egg diet? I read about that one today while researching this list
July 15th, 2009 at 2:56 am
@amo (23):
300 calories? Sounds like “we” could pump up the outtake to about 600!! What do you say your house or mine?
July 15th, 2009 at 3:04 am
A good diet that works is imitate the diet (i don’t remember its name) in which you have to eat only animal proteins (meat, lard, etc) to lost “water weight”, then re-introduce gradually the vegetables, and exercise (don’t recommendable the first only meat weeks ’cause you’ll feel tired). It’s a good diet for lose some weight fast. Don’t use it a regular diet, only when you ate too much in holidays or something.
July 15th, 2009 at 3:05 am
I weighed 84 kilos and went down to 68 kilos in 3-4 months. And I was eating as much as I wanted of everything: meat, cheese, nuts, vegetables, etc. When I went down to 68 kilos I started to get worried because I was eating so much and still losing weight, and I didn’t want to eat more to stop the trend.
What was the magic? Simple: exercise and calorie counting.
I started going to the gym and using a calorie counter. I also looked for the amount of calories a normal man burns every day through chores and body metabolism.
On the other hand, at the canteen I used the weighing scale they had there for salads to weigh my food, and bought one of my own to use at home. And every day I introduced what I ate and how much of it in an online calculator to obtain how many calories I had ingested.
As long as I maintained calories burnt > calories ingested, my body would shed weight on cue. No hunger, no frustration, no guilt. And the funny part is that I actually enjoyed going to the gym.
Now that I have stopped exercising, the kilos are coming back. But I know that all I need, that all anyone needs, is to get off my (his/her) lazy ass(es) and start burning calories. No need to starve you to death or put parasites in you.
Pac
July 15th, 2009 at 3:06 am
How bout you just eat a slice of bread and a bowl of soup each day, and then do some work. I believe that diet was pretty hot back in the ’40s.
July 15th, 2009 at 3:07 am
@ Jfrater :
You left out the “Actors Diet”, it consists on eating fruit all day, smoking 2 packs of cigarettes, chewing gum and runnning from the paparazzi…
July 15th, 2009 at 3:14 am
@Travis (26):
lets do this thing!
July 15th, 2009 at 3:21 am
@pac (28): that sounds like the perfect approach to me
July 15th, 2009 at 3:22 am
@jfrater (25): I don’t think so. Dinner on the metabolism diet is usually a steak and a cup of spinach… Though I don’t know the rules of the egg diet, so could be the same.
July 15th, 2009 at 3:36 am
@amo (31):
Alright… if we’re gonna do this we’ve gotta do it right!
First I will slip in a couple of funny pills a “friend of mine” gave me into both our drinks… yes I am a gentleman and I will offer some beverages.
Then we have a small chat about our sexual backround and preferences… very casual of course!
I will then gently rub your thigh with the back of my middle finger indicating a move into the sleeping quaters. As we get there I will slowly remove both our cloths and commence the so called “lubrification” where we will spread some hot butter all over our bodies in a very sensual way. Never losing eye-contact.
By then hopefully the pills will take on their effect, we will turn the lights dimm and you shall whisper those 2 very special words, I am sure you know!
And then… well and then we will see what happens….
July 15th, 2009 at 3:38 am
Oh Jamie, 3 lists in 3 days (by you). Is that a record ? (or is it an attempt to … ) Anyways, great list. Also, there is one diet which consists of only water. How bout it?
July 15th, 2009 at 4:24 am
I’m having a hard time deciding which of these it the dumbest. It comes down to a close tie between the creationists and the evolutionists. In a wierd twist of irony I think the evolutionists take the cake when it comes to dumb diets.
As for the most evil: Easy – Breatherianism. Someone should put this guy in jail.
July 15th, 2009 at 4:24 am
@Travis (34):
That is the best offer i have ever recieved in my entire life.
You certainly are a gentleman, and one i would be priviliged to let spread hot butter all over me.
I’m charmed, intrigued, and strangely hungry all at the same time..
July 15th, 2009 at 4:46 am
Fruitatarianism is far weirder than fruitarianism! Fruitatarians are extreme vegetarians who only eat fruit that doesn’t damage the plant it comes from ie. an apple can fall from the tree but you can’t pull a carrot from the ground
July 15th, 2009 at 4:46 am
it is scientificly proven that 8 hours or more of sleep can be harmful due to the paralysis in deep sleep that if prolonged can begin to destroy muscle tissue. i would never try these diets, you just gotta realise that if you eat badly and dont exersise your going to gain weight!
July 15th, 2009 at 4:52 am
My diet?
I eat what I want, then get off my lazy ass and exercise daily. Also, I have hypothyroidism and take Levothyroxine daily (250 mcg) so I don’t want any excuses about “it’s glandular” or “exercise doesn’t work”. I am 32, 6 foot tall, and 190 lbs.
A little willpower and discipline go a long way.
July 15th, 2009 at 4:56 am
Jono
July 15th, 2009 at 2:16 am
I wonder if I’ll be alive when people learn about the true horror of carbohydrates and they finally get relegated to a position of snack, rather than food.
The Paleolithic diet is by far the most sustainable diet on this entire page, and is how people should be living. Carbohydrates are completely unessential for life.
—
They sure are, except carbohydrates play major roles in the working process of the immune system, fertilization, pathogenesis, blood clotting, and development.
So yeah, if you can live without those functions, cut them out completely.
July 15th, 2009 at 5:11 am
@Travis (16): :O
July 15th, 2009 at 5:11 am
People who go on these diets or fashionable diets are far too lazy to actually lose weight. I’ve been borderline obese for most of my life but I’ve recently been making changes in my life to turn it around. I cycle regularly, I hardly eaten chocolate all summer by telling myself it will melt and I’m better saving the money. Now I’m trying to replace snacks and cola with healthier things.
Looks like listverse users are good dieters
July 15th, 2009 at 5:12 am
I think the sleeping beauty diet sounds good! Me and my friend once tried to be fruitarian for a week when researching a project. It didn’t work!
July 15th, 2009 at 5:14 am
@41 8bithero
Inuit people don’t have ready access to carbohydrates and they do OK.
From Wikipedia’s entry on Vilhalmur Stefansson (a Canadian Arctic explorer and ethnologist):
“Stefansson is also a figure of considerable interest in dietary circles, especially those with an interest in very low-carbohydrate diets. Stefansson documented the fact that most Inuit lived on a diet of about 90% meat and fish, often going 6–9 months a year on nothing but meat and fish—essentially, a no-carbohydrate diet. He found that he and his fellow European-descent explorers were also perfectly healthy on such a diet. When medical authorities questioned him on this, he and a fellow explorer agreed to undertake a study under the auspices of the Journal of the American Medical Association to demonstrate that they could eat a 100% meat diet in a closely-observed laboratory setting for the first several weeks, with paid observers for the rest of an entire year. The results were published in the Journal of the AMA, and both men were perfectly healthy on such a diet, without vitamin supplementation or anything else in their diet except meat.”
Thing is, carbohydrates are not essential nutrients in humans: the body can obtain all its energy from protein and fats, and you only need a small amount of vegetables and such to supplement the glucose that the human body can create on its own in order to meet the quota needed by neurons to work properly.
Pac
July 15th, 2009 at 5:21 am
“Nature will castigate those who don’t masticate.”
It’s just as well that there’s no such word as “casturbate”.
July 15th, 2009 at 5:26 am
No matter how much I eat, I never gain weight!
(I know, you are hating me…)
July 15th, 2009 at 5:26 am
Cool list. I recently did a cucumber salad/fruit salad diet, but it was more of a cleanse, really. These diets remind me of the stories you sometimes hear of families who have very restrictive vegan or “religious” diets and make their young kids adhere to them, oftentimes resulting in malnutrition or death. In this story of a vegan mom:
http://www.azfamily.com/news/local/stories/KTVKLNews20070802_vegan-mother-sentenced.d7f1c241.html
her 3-year-old weighed 12 pounds, her 9-year-old child weighed 29 pounds and her 11-year-old child weighed 36 pounds. My almost 2 year old is probably 30 lbs or more!
July 15th, 2009 at 5:35 am
Hi. Very interesting list, as usual JF. Diets could be said to be a matter of common sense if it weren’t for the fact that quite a few people are pretty lazy when it comes to actually doing something about it. Going to a gym is a horrifying thought to many; who see it as admitting defeat; and can feel conspicuous when surrounded by hoards of toned beef-cakes. Isn’t it far easier to take a pill for $30 a day?
For those who want more from a diet than a glorified water tablet, there is only one pure essential ingredient; the right mental attitude – the power to see it through. Some folks start with sheer grit determination and wonder why, after a week, their powers of mind over matter simply crash and burn. Similarly, within a week, those with a lax attitude find themselves bowing under the pressure of constant temptation. The trick is to take the middle path, and to calmly keep at it until the chore becomes a ritual becomes a routine. (I used to be a health coach …can you tell?)
One last tip… try to be creative. Dancersise, trampolining, shadow boxing, walking one mile a day – excersise doesn’t have to be boring! And the same goes for food.
If you want an easy diet snack, why not try the three Ps: Pasta, Pesto and Parmesan. My ex-wife use to swear by this dish.
Breatharianism: Pranayama breathing works – but it doesn’t taste of anything.
@deano (39): I sleep at least 10 hours a night, but then I naturally do that.
July 15th, 2009 at 5:43 am
I sense a contradiction in #6. No fish/seafood allowed, yet so many people in the Bible were fishermen! Also, the paragraph only lists Phase 1…what about 2 & 3? Or do people never get past Phase 1 so they never wrote a 2 or 3?
July 15th, 2009 at 5:49 am
Amo and Travis… Get a room! ;D
Hey Jamie- heard there was an earthquake in your neck of the woods- You ok?
July 15th, 2009 at 5:51 am
@amo (37):
It’ll be evil, dark, long, hard and sweaty… you will cry, beg, scream for more and more and more… you shall call me the most atrocious names man kind has ever heard, you will have an outta-body experience witnessing the most devilish and unsacred actions known only to “the ones whom we dont speak of”!!
WE WILL BURN THOSE CALORIES!!
(am I taking it too far? I might need to excuse myself to the mens room…)
July 15th, 2009 at 5:51 am
“Nature will castigate those who don’t masticate.”
I glanced at this and at first thought it said “masturbate” … Wonder how many calories THAT burns….
July 15th, 2009 at 5:56 am
Weird list today. I thought the Fletcherizing was kinda gross. Keeping food in my mouth that long would make me barf.
I have been overweight all my life. Never really thought anything of it. It was when I tried to lose weight for the first time that I had some issues. I am allergic to all synthetic sugars. I can’t have sugar-free or diet anything because it will make me sick. So I had to cut out all sugar. Along with that, I have learned to regulate my portions and eat healthier. My only problem is exercise. Living in Arizona, it’s too hot to do ANYthing let alone exercise.
July 15th, 2009 at 6:12 am
These make a healthy balanced diet look strange!
July 15th, 2009 at 6:21 am
I was eating breakfast while reading this and I attempted to chew my bagel 32 times. It got really gross. The actual thinking behind that one is pretty good though- take your time while eating. If you slow your meal down and enjoy it, you’re less likely to overeat. It takes 20 minutes for your brain to realize you’re full so if you scarf a slice of pizza in five, you’ll still feel hungry and go searching for chips or cookies or whatever, ubt if you can make that slice last, you’ll eat less.
Also, I’ll admit to doing the cabbage soup diet more times than I can count. It’s not good for you but if you have something you have to look good for, it works. It’s not pleasant, but it works.
July 15th, 2009 at 6:21 am
Alright, I’m not really overweight but just want to lose some pounds. Last year I went from 68 to 75kg and it’s time to stop that (I’m a 175cm guy).
So the last few weeks I hit the gym, instead of a bag of chips I eat oranges etc, and it’s going pretty well. Already lost about 3 or 4 pounds. I’m not in a hurry, I like my new lifestyle so it’s fine.
But to all the commenters bashing the diets: What’s wrong with the Shangri-La Diet?
Just drinking some sugar water on a day doesn’t seem to hurt. I think I’ll go try it out, every little bit helps.
July 15th, 2009 at 6:29 am
You would have to be pretty desperate to try any of these. You just cannot go too wrong with eating a balanced diet. I’m no nutritionist but common sense tells me a wide variety of different food = a wide variety of vitamins and minerals. My metabolism is really quick anyways. I can eat whatever the hell I want and stay thin. It’s a little annoying as I wouldn’t mind packing on a few pounds.
Here is the most hilarious diet advertisement ever courtesy of Peter Serafinwicz. Enjoy:
July 15th, 2009 at 6:33 am
The Breatharians are real. I thought it was a joke myself when I first heard it… of course, obviously no one can really stick to such a “diet,” but they’re not a myth, these people.
A friend of mine has a lot to do with the “Rainbow Gatherings” that occur, annually, around the country and in parts of Europe. This, if you ask me, is what’s left of the core Hippie fringe that has remained intact since the late 60s, but of course a lot of these people don’t go back that far. At any rate, he and his wife go to these “gatherings” quite people, to join the “People of the Rainbow” and there’s even a documentary out about it now, which he was associated with, which made the rounds at Sundance and so on.
Anyway, the last gathering he was at, out west, he meets up with these “Breatharians.” So he comes back and tells us about it. We were…. amused. To say the least. As was he. But they’re real people. They believe it. They claim they practice it. Naturally, biology being what it is, they can’t be telling the whole truth. But they exist and they’re out there.
There’s no end to the bizarre ways of the human monkey, folks.
July 15th, 2009 at 6:36 am
I used to do a lemon juice fast called the “Master Cleanser.”
Make a hot tea of freshly squeezed lemon juice
Add a bit of Grade B maple syrup
and a dash of cayenne pepper.
Living on that for a few days always made me feel downright euphoric.
Most of this list…
Oh.
My.
God.
Gag me with a spoon.
@Morisson4ever (5):
Good luck to you sweetheart!
@Travis (16):
Here’s a diet especially for YOU! Guaranteed that you’ll lose TEN UGLY POUNDS: Cut off your head.
July 15th, 2009 at 6:41 am
Wow…That last one got me. Blech. Funny though, that as of right now I’m trying the cabbage soup diet, and of course it’s working because it’s water weight. I’m not following it to the letter, however made up my own spin. And yes, the gas is relentless. Painful at times. In fact, I think I even farted myself awake last night…
July 15th, 2009 at 6:49 am
Reduce intake, increase activity. Simple.
Americans eat too much and exercise too little.
July 15th, 2009 at 7:00 am
I never understood the whole vegan thing. It’s human instinct to eat meat. I can’t imagine a lion out on the Serengeti looking at an antelope and thinking: “Whoa. That CAN’T be good for me!”
July 15th, 2009 at 7:02 am
@frushka (60):
Now you’re messing with my good nature!
July 15th, 2009 at 7:09 am
i eat as much as i want, which is pretty much
and i don’t do much exercise
and i still have some nice body curve =)
i guess i’m just lucky than =D
July 15th, 2009 at 7:10 am
My parents would do the cabbage soup diet every now and then. The soup actually didn’t taste bad, but there’t no way I’d want to eat it all the time. The diet they used actually combined the soup with different foods. One day it was soup and fruit, the next soup and veggies, another day soup and meat. Can’t ever verify that it did anything, though.
July 15th, 2009 at 7:14 am
I remember my mom trying the cabage soup diet at one time, and after a bowl I was still hungery… for anything but more cabage soup!
July 15th, 2009 at 7:24 am
More like “evolutionism” diet. 10,000 years? Billions? How would you know? You couldn’t. Ah, humanity.
July 15th, 2009 at 7:27 am
@Travis (52):
There’s no such thing as taking it too far, as long as its all in the name of burning those calories ;D
and please, by all accounts, excuse yourself to the mens room!
July 15th, 2009 at 7:36 am
My problem is my appetite. It’s huge. All the “rules” about which foods curb your hunger don’t work for me-they have the opposite effect. I’ve gone to nutritionists and followed their advice and nothing worked. I’ve even begged my doctor for a pill to curb my appetite but he won’t prescribe one because they are dangerous.
I exercise (if I don’t I’ll be huge) but as the years go by my metabolism is slowing down and the appetite is going up.
I don’t just get a little hungry and some fruit will hold me over-I’M STARVING! And I get violently ill if I don’t satisfy it. And it’s hard to satisfy it (yes, I’ve been tested for everything under the sun).
People should remember this-bodies are not interchangable. What might work for one doesn’t mean it will work for everyone. I know people who eat like horses and don’t exercise and they are stick thin. And I know people who are the opposite.
Find out the facts about that person before you judge and criticize and tell them to get off their butts. :::jumpingoffsoapbox:::
July 15th, 2009 at 7:39 am
@amo (69):
“There’s no such thing as taking it too far..”
I think I’m falling in love with you!!
July 15th, 2009 at 7:42 am
Cookietarianism: Me. I am eating a cookie. This is all anyone should eat.
Omnomnomnomnom!
July 15th, 2009 at 8:08 am
Simple, successful diet:
1. Eat when you are hungry
2. STOP when you are full
3. Drink plenty of water
4. Exercise
July 15th, 2009 at 8:09 am
The cabbage soup diet reminded me of stories of concentration camps in Germany. So yeah, I guess you will lose weight, but look like a refugee?
Item #1-Tapeworm diet and bonus Last Chance diet both made me want to lose my breakfast–Which is another way to lose weight.
@callie19 (56):”The actual thinking behind that one is pretty good though- take your time while eating. If you slow your meal down and enjoy it, you’re less likely to overeat. It takes 20 minutes for your brain to realize you’re full so if you scarf a slice of pizza in five, you’ll still feel hungry and go searching for chips or cookies or whatever, ubt if you can make that slice last, you’ll eat less.”
I have also heard that the feeling of “fullness” is triggered by a release of brain chemical, and that it takes approx. 15 minutes after eating for that to occur.
So most dietitians advocate laying your fork or spoon down on the plate as you chew, as this helps extend your meal time. If you desire second helpings, wait 5-10 minutes before doing so. Chances are you will no longer want them.
Drinking an 8 oz. glass of water or other beverage about 10 minutes before a meal will help the feeling of fullness/satisfaction and help reduce portions without making you feel deprived. It also helps reduce dehydration and can aid in digestion.
For some people, having their portions placed on a smaller sized plate will psychologically add to the feeling of fullness, on the basis that a full looking plate equals a full stomach.
July 15th, 2009 at 8:12 am
And Jamie, I too was worried about you and some of the other members when I heard about the earthquake. Please thumb your nose at us soon.
July 15th, 2009 at 8:24 am
Breathism (however its spelt) actually does work! Its practised mainly in places such as India, by Sages/ Swamis, who seem to be able to live off the rays of the Sun!!
July 15th, 2009 at 8:33 am
Personally, my best weight loss occurred when i didn’t deny any type of food for myself, but I DID do some serious portion control on those fattening foods I love.
Since I am a long time mom with enough people in the house, leftovers don’t sit around and tempt me.
Pizza Night–the works pizza and I would limit to 1/2 a slice.
Ice cream–Just two or three spoonfuls straight from the bucket while doing my housework, no sitting on my ass with a topping covered bowlful.
Mac and cheese–Just a couple of bites once prepared, then the kids took care of the rest. The same with a tray of fries, grab a couple off the tray and without a plate- no calorie filled dipping sauces!
A nibble off of the kids’ candy bar, as I peeled the wrapper open for them.
A really small bowl used to portion control chips, instead of the whole bag on my lap. Often I ate less chips that way than a single portion sized bag holds.
BBQ burgers–lose the bun, and eat with a fork. Smaller bites that way, and I didn’t feel guilty about the slice of cheese.
Real cheese slices as opposed to processed cheese slices.
Deli style sliced keeps the portion small yet satisfies the craving.
I also didn’t live in oven-hot Arizona at the time, so I was a lot more active.
July 15th, 2009 at 8:55 am
Great list.. it’s amazing what some people will go through to try and lose a few pounds.. although the kicker is with a lot of the quick-fix diets the body enters a starvation mode, and so when you do eventually eat ‘normally’ again you actually pile on the pounds a lto faster.
Expected the Maple Syrup diet to be on here though.. that’s just strange..
July 15th, 2009 at 8:56 am
I find it interesting that Fruitarians (sp?) and The Maker’s Diet take one passage they decide to live by, no matter how the law changed in later passages. They have blinders on.
I am convinced that breathernarians (sp?) are the masters of the midnight snack.
July 15th, 2009 at 8:58 am
I agree with copperdragon @ 73 only eat when you are hungry, Ive been doing it for years.
When its breakfast, lunch or supper time does that mean you should eat 3 full meals a day, I say no your body tells you when it needs some boosting, Its worked for me over time
My pennies worth
July 15th, 2009 at 8:58 am
I didn’t realize eating nothing was considered a diet. -_-
July 15th, 2009 at 9:09 am
Professor Arnold Ehret’s ‘Mucusless Diet Healing System’, his belief that what we eat can kill us is not as farfetched as one might imagine.
http://www.therealfoodchannel.com/page/22.html
July 15th, 2009 at 9:18 am
Great List. I’m glad I dont have to go on a diet, this would certainly freak me out if I did.
What confuses me, is that most people know that in order to lose weight exercise is key. Instead of sweating a few pounds they would rather go on the “eat nothing” diet and starve themselves for those few pounds–weird.
July 15th, 2009 at 9:19 am
“BBQ burgers–lose the bun, and eat with a fork. Smaller bites that way, and I didn’t feel guilty about the slice of cheese.”
“Pizza Night–the works pizza and I would limit to 1/2 a slice.”
-Deeeziner
If I’m going going to eat pizza and burgers, I’m going to goddamn enjoy it. Half a slice of pizza wouldn’t satisfy me, and who eats burgers without the bun (save for if you’re having salisbary steak that night)?!
I think the whole point of junk food is that it’s okay to eat a bunch, as long as you’re not eating a bunch all the time.
July 15th, 2009 at 9:24 am
Wow is it hot in here? Travis and amo?
July 15th, 2009 at 9:29 am
hey, that Breatharianism diet has actually been around for a long long time under another name. Anorexia..Jeez, are people really that stupid? to think that they can just not eat and live?
God made me chubby and that’s how i’ll stay… thanks!
July 15th, 2009 at 9:30 am
Some fruits, like mango and banana, are rich in vitamin B12.
July 15th, 2009 at 9:32 am
@Bunbunbunbun` (84): These were small modifications to my established eating habits that I found kept me from bingeing (no purging), or going hog wild from food denials.
I was able to still indulge my taste buds, yet not overdo it. And because I was seeing weight come off, I didn’t feel I had to deny myself a burger or some fries once in a while, when i had the kids with me afterschool or on the weekends.
I don’t expect that these tips will make sense or seem valid to everyone here at the site.
We all have different metabolisms, food habits and diet beliefs.
But perhaps these small tips might give some ONE other reader here just the confidence that they can change their habits too.
July 15th, 2009 at 9:33 am
The tape worm diet and the bonus really got inot me. XP
July 15th, 2009 at 9:49 am
interesting list.
Check this one out :
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ram_Bomjon
he was featured in a documentary on discovery channel called ” the boy with divine powers ”
this documentary also showed a scientific study conducted on another sadhu in a controlled environment. the sadhu ate nothing and only took calculated amount of water. all he did was stare at the sun. he claims that he can live like that if he wanted to. Can be a hoax too.
July 15th, 2009 at 9:50 am
Breatharianism has been around for a long time, by the name of starvation. Mostly, people don’t do it on purpose. And if there are people who really do it on purpose, you must be kidding me.
A question: Why is it called a diet if you do not eat anything ? And also, if they don’t eat anything, how do they live ?
Though I saw a man on TV that hasn’t eaten anything in 30 years, I still think its more of a miracle, not a diet.
July 15th, 2009 at 10:03 am
Once, years ago, I wanted to lose a few pounds before Christmas. I wound up waiting and then only had a few days left. I ate nothing but pickles for like 2 days, except a small portion of whatever my mother made for dinner. I shed a couple of pounds, but when I ate Christmas Eve dinner, I instantly gained it back. lol
I’m a receptionist for a small health supplement company. The owners are a married couple, and I just laugh at them for the diets they go on. The woman is tiny, but her husband has some trouble maintaining his weight, so she gets stuck dieting with him. Maybe it’s the fact that he’s 50something and doesn’t excersize? I think working out regularly would shed those few extra pounds he has.
My sister has struggeled with her weight for years. She always goes on the weirdest diets. Once she had to go a week, eating nothing but one particular food each day (ie. tuna on wednesday, pineapple on thursday). Needless to say she didn’t make it through the first week.
People need to understand the difference between dieting temporarily and making a permanent change to their diet. Learn what you need to maintain the weight you are at, or possibly shed a few pounds. Choose a workout plan that will help you to lose weight and tone up, while not becoming ridiculously ripped. If you don’t want to work out, then your diet change will at least keep you from gaining more weight. I’m that person. I havn’t convinced myself to work out each day, but I at least keep away from unhealthy snacking and maintain the weight I am at.
July 15th, 2009 at 10:09 am
Of course, the real answer, for most people, is to eat fewer calories than you burn during the day and you will automatically lose weight.
Do notice that I used the modifier “most”. For the few unfortunate people who suffer from hypothyroidism or several other metabolic diseases, weight loss (or weight gain) can be neigh on impossible. That these people are rare is true, but shouldn’t be discounted out of hand.
otoh, I remember an ad in the back pages of a magazine I was reading when I was about 12, which offered capsules of tape worms for some nominal price. Having already read about them, and knowing that they can go astray, I was horrified that the ad was allowed to run at all!
July 15th, 2009 at 10:10 am
I’m on the Beaver Ass Juice Diet.
July 15th, 2009 at 10:11 am
Also, as for ice cream… I buy those little single serving cups that Bluebell sells. They only offer dutch chocolate and vanilla, but that’s fine by me. There are like 10 or 12 in a pack, and I can eat one here or there, and not feel bad about it. It really helps with portion control.
July 15th, 2009 at 10:17 am
I remember the cabbage soup diet and it was actualy introduced by the Mayo Clinic for very overweghit heart patients. My parents did it for about two months obviously going back towards normal foods after each week passed. I couldn’t cope with the diet and snuck down to get me double bacon burger every now and then. Brings back memories.
July 15th, 2009 at 10:37 am
@bucslim 94 I like that one, how about some running, enter a farm barnyard, let somebody lock the door behind you and you are confronted by 10 smiling Honey Badgers.
July 15th, 2009 at 10:40 am
@bucslim (94): How’s that going?
July 15th, 2009 at 10:47 am
i wonder if the cabbage soup diet is an extension of the (myth?) that it takes more calories to eat a piece of celery than the celery has in it?
July 15th, 2009 at 10:50 am
@copperdragon (73):
Absolutely agree with you ,people tend to complicate the issue instead of sticking to the basics.
As for myself, I’ve been on the wine diet for a couple of years…losing about two days per week!
July 15th, 2009 at 10:55 am
@frushka (60): I actually added the Master Cleanse diet but removed it in favor of one of the other items
July 15th, 2009 at 10:58 am
@Danielle (72): There actually IS a cookie diet – you eat nothing but special cookies (as many as you like) for breakfast and lunch then a normal meal at dinner. Madonna’s husband did it apparently.
July 15th, 2009 at 10:58 am
@Mtatazela (100): We must have quite different metabolisms – I am on the same diet but I am loosing more like 3 – 4 days per week
July 15th, 2009 at 11:00 am
Interesting list. I think that Copperdragon(73) stated quite eloquently the best diet. I try to eat a piece of fruit about 1/2 hour before meals to cut down how much I eat (I pig out way too much) and take a walk everyday.
Some of these diets are really weird. I looked at the site for Breatharianism, and thought that it was the creepiest. But the chewing and the tape worms are right up there vying for the number one spot.
Travis and Amo, you guys are having way too much fun.
July 15th, 2009 at 11:04 am
@deeeziner (75): wow! A 7.8 quake! I didn’t know about it until you mentioned it in your comment. I have looked it up and it was in Fiordland which is at the bottom of the South Island – I live at the bottom of the North Island which is a LONG way (in NZ terms) from there.
Anyway – I am alive and well
July 15th, 2009 at 11:09 am
I don’t know why people think that it’s the type of food/how you eat it what makes you lose or gain weight. Please note that I’m not talking about nutrition and what is healthier for the body. No. The fact is that if your body needs 2500 calories per day, for example, you will end up gaining weight whenever you eat on 2501, 2600 or 3000+ calories, and this is regardless of how “healthy” or “trashy” the food is. 2700 calories from lean, grass-fed beef have the same effect on your body weight as 2700 calories from the appropriate number of “beef” patties served at your nearest burger joint or from 2700 calories of apples fallen by gravity’s pull and nothing else.
Now, if you eat 1/2 a slice of pizza, the patty of a burger without the bun, and the odd slice of cheese, the only thing that you are doing is cutting down the amount of calories you eat. Less calories eaten –> less body weight. However, cutting food to small bites with a fork amounts to nothing, apart from making one think that it does. 2700 calories whole = 2700 calories cut down with a fork.
If you are going to exercise, please note that you need to really put in an effort; just strolling for 15 minutes is of no help at all. The good and bad thing about our bodies and food is that we do not need a huge amount of calories to meet the quota required to live. And most food contains a lot of calories, specially things like cheese and nuts and oils. If you do not know how many calories each food has, it is incredibly easy to go beyond the 2500+- calories the body needs. To give you a perspective on these two facts: one can run full speed for 10 minutes on a treadmill, and the amount of calories burnt is roughly equal to a handful of almonds. I’m sorry to break this to you, but you really need to sweat it out to get any benefit from exercise; you need to be really committed and take the time to prove it.
Finally, that thing about “metabolism differences”. Sorry, but I believe that this a lame excuse used by a lot of people in order to justify their weight. If the human metabolism is so different from person to person, well, then things like medicine, nutrition, sleep and food requirements, etc. would need to be customized to each person in order to be really useful, and that is not the case. True, there are cases of people that do have metabolic issues. But they should first address those issues and try to normalize how their body works BEFORE worrying about losing/gaining weight.
Pac
July 15th, 2009 at 11:10 am
I’ve tried a coockie diet very successfully
Lost a lot of weight
Made lots of friends
Almost spend some time
Hang on , I should not go trough the
furore of the canabis list again!
July 15th, 2009 at 11:10 am
thanks for the compliments on my simple diet…i have been following it for years, and am only 10 pounds heavier than in high school (150 then, 160 now), with most of it muscle.
i tend to follow my food cravings, which i think is my body’s way of telling me I’m low on something. Sometimes I’ll have an orange a day for a week, then go a month without any.
My daughter and I joke about our “grease” level being low about once a month – then we head for McDonalds or some other fast food spot. (maybe my MSG is low?)
For exercise, I hike (just did the Grand Canyon which is nearby), golf, swim.
July 15th, 2009 at 11:19 am
@copperdragon (99): The celery thing really is a myth – item 5
July 15th, 2009 at 11:24 am
@copperdragon (108): Interesting you say that you should eat when hungry and stop when full; I was recently told by a friend who is a personal trainer that when you are hungry it is “too late”. That reminded me a lot of the “if you are thirsty, it is too late” which I believe to be a myth. I am sure the hunger one is too.
Why would our bodies have a hunger and thirst mechanism if they only indicate that we should have eaten? Wouldn’t it make more sense for them to work like the pain mechanism and function to tell us it is time to eat or drink?
It amazes me that so many people believe that stuff.
So I too agree with your diet – it is the best way to go.
July 15th, 2009 at 11:56 am
@jfrater (110): Wow, no JF for ages and then JF City! Yeah, sometimes I too hear news on here before anywhere else – must be good to know the news-hounds are always keen to share.
My Mother is on the wine diet – she whines, I leave.
July 15th, 2009 at 12:00 pm
@jfrater (110): BTW, I thought you’d put your own diet success down to having two packs of smokes a day. We should call you 2pac.
It’s true though, smokes do cut down the food cravings a lot. I can go all day without food if I smoke. Sad huh?
July 15th, 2009 at 12:06 pm
@Lifeschool (112): I find coffee stops me eating or feeling hungry. I just smoke regardless of hunger and it doesn’t seem to stop me being hungry. Oh – and I only smoke 1 pac a day!
July 15th, 2009 at 12:09 pm
@ Number One. WHAT… THE… F
July 15th, 2009 at 12:19 pm
I’d rather be overweight than get involved with ANY of these diets. I prefer to eat like a French person- have the things I like, but in moderation, and with plenty of veggies. What’s good for you is often quite delicious, and I love to cook. Play games, dance, laugh a lot, try not to worry, and have plenty of healthy sex. These are all fun things that are good for you. I got weighed at the doctor recently- I’m down ten pounds while in college! Freshman fifteen? Bah!
July 15th, 2009 at 12:37 pm
@jfrater (110): The “if you’re thirsty it’s too late” thing is a myth:
http://health.msn.com/blogs/healthy-diet-fit-body-post.aspx?post=1188190>1=31036
And I agree with you – why would our bodies be telling us “you probably should have had a drink an hour ago”? That’s just ridiculous.
Btw, “when you’re hungry it’s too late” – for what? Are you on your way to starvation? Anorexia? Did your friend mention that?
July 15th, 2009 at 12:51 pm
my aunt did the makers she lost 20 something pounds
July 15th, 2009 at 12:52 pm
@moshmonster (115): I think the French method is excellent – the philosophy applies to virtually everything in life: everything in moderation.
July 15th, 2009 at 12:54 pm
@egernunge (116): hahah good point. I think it is all part of the silly “six meals a day” thing – it justifies eating in a routine that is foreign to most of us. Thanks for that link btw
July 15th, 2009 at 12:57 pm
@pac (106): I do not agree that exercise has to be a full out or nothing. Many people cannot do other than moderate exercise, because of other health problems. Any exercise is better than nothing, and will burn calories.
I think that diets are more mental than physical, in that they help us weak and undisciplined mortals get into a mindset to eat less and exercise more, and maybe to know that we are not alone.
My opinion only.
July 15th, 2009 at 1:02 pm
@redcaboose (120): Agree! Any excercise will help. Just getting off the couch and moving along helps. I have many health issues myself but I try what I can. Even though it’s hotter than hell here in AZ, I try a bit.
I have found that I like Dance Dance Revolution. I play with my kid (even though I am on the easy level while she is on difficult). It’s funny that you don’t realize when you are playing that it’s exercise because it’s so much fun.
I have lost 16 pounds so far by playing the game. At least I am having fun while trying to lose weight!
July 15th, 2009 at 1:09 pm
@oouchan (121)
I agree with DDR! I actually have it with me in college and play it everyday and have a blast burning calories. It truly is an underrated form of exercise.
July 15th, 2009 at 1:13 pm
Its seems as if a lot of people fail to realize there’s cyber sex going on in the posts or just choose to ignore it. Anyhoo Carry On Amo & Travis….
July 15th, 2009 at 1:19 pm
@bucslim (94):
“I’m on the Beaver Ass Juice Diet.”
Isn’t that rough on the gall bladder?
I heard a story once… there was a small-time boxer in the 30s…. “Pancake” Pretty Paulson… he’d pummeled his way up through the bush leagues, fighting hobos and cripples in vacant lots throughout cities in the South… so finally he gets his big break, fighting Roofer Rapplea, the medium-medium-weight champ of Tuscaloosa, Biloxi, and Charlottsburg… Roofer, by the way, made his reputation by only fighting orphans. He used to make the rounds of the seedier orphanages in the Midwest and the South, from Memphis to Chicago, his manager laying bets down as to how many orphans Roofer could take on in a single afternoon.
Well anyway, comes the week of the big fight, and “Pancake” is like 12 pounds overweight. So his trainer, No-Eyes Blaisdell–he’d fought Sally “Soft Tomato” Pilinsky for the championship in the Meadowlands back in Ought-Six, if you know your weird boxing history—well, No-Eyes comes up with this crash diet he’d heard from his grandma back in the wilds of Kentucky… straight Beaver Ass Juice, and nothing else. So he puts “Pancake” on the BAJ for a week.
Come the night of the fight, “Pancake” is down to his fighting weight (but he looks REALLY sick) but in the first round, what happens? Roofer Rapplyea lands a crushing right to “Pancake’s” mid-section, and his gall-bladder EXPLODES, and out comes all this beaver ass juice, drenching the audience. I think they called that a technical knockout…. and “Pancake” went back to fighting misshapen hobos in backalleys and junkyards. Sad.
July 15th, 2009 at 1:31 pm
You’re all missing out on the Liquid Draino diet… Taken in small doses it’s incredibly effective!
“Sure it cleans you out, but it leaves you hollow inside.”
July 15th, 2009 at 1:31 pm
wow Jamie – you are quite the conundrum!!
you are an excellent cook (chef even?) and despise using a microwave because of its effect on food … yet you smoke?!? You’re basically rolling every bite of food in an ashtray.
Interesting.
BTW – the “if you’re thirsty, its too late” is not a myth.
Thirst (and hunger) is the body’s way of giving you a warning – “if you keep this up, something bad will happen”. When you detect that you are thirsty/hungry, your brain has already starting preparing your body for conservation.
Also, the “six meals a day” concept came from helping people to not gorge. Six small “meals” (which could be snacks) help keep the body fueled and maintain a steady energy level without over-eating and feeling sluggish.
July 15th, 2009 at 1:47 pm
@copperdragon (126): Usually, the “too late” thing refers to “already dehydrated” – which is a myth. You’re not dehydrated if you’re thirsty – it’s just your body telling you that it’s time to drink something. If you ignore the thirst, however, you will eventually become dehydrated. Same thing with hunger – if your don’t eat for a certain amount of time, then yes, your body will start shutting down to “starvation mode”. But that starts much later than from the moment you start feeling hungry.
July 15th, 2009 at 2:01 pm
This is my idea of a good diet guidelines…
1) Obviously, exercise and drink water.
2) Calorie counting/limiting portions helps as well.
3) As for carbs, starches, and too much fatty oils–limit them.
4) Sometimes your body tells you that it’s hungry when you’re bored–how many times do you grab a snack (or two) when you sit down to watch TV or work on the computer? Keep yourself occupied and keep yourself MOVING. You’ll be exercising and preventing yourself from becoming a couch potato…and you’ll resist those extra handfuls of Doritos.
5) Your body requires sleep, and you actually burn calories as you do. Your body re-regulates everything as you get those Z’s…over-sleeping is, however, not necessary. That “Sleeping Beauty” diet made me laugh. So make sure you get enough hours of sleeping. It’s unfortunate that most people seem to not get enough.
6) Some people don’t have enough time (or money!) to invest in a gym membership, but you really don’t need to go there to exercise. Even just taking a walk for a half an hour every day can make a difference.
7) If you can’t turn off the TV, do simple exercises on the commercials. (Get those jumping-jacks and push-ups in!)
9) And finally, stay away from soft drinks. Those are what murder everyone’s waistlines. I mean one bottle of coke has what, like a cup of sugar in it? I don’t remember the exact amount…but look it up. It’s nasty. And anyways, there are PLENTY of yummy alternatives…Tea comes in tons of different flavors. Water is always the best…even drinking a cup of milk or something is great, too.
Hope that helps =]
July 15th, 2009 at 2:02 pm
I’m not sure why that smiley came up. haha. Ignore that.
July 15th, 2009 at 2:04 pm
I agree with some of the people that said coffee helps with the cravings, but then it gets hard for me to fall asleep.
July 15th, 2009 at 2:12 pm
Another Diet… The Banana Diet. You have nothing but bananas all day long… At the end of the day you can peel them and eat them…
July 15th, 2009 at 2:35 pm
@87. JK: Mangoes and Bananas are NOT a reliable source of B12.
:start_rant:It is a bacteria that is found readily in dirt, and therefore surrounding the fruit that is grown in or near it. Unfortunately, we tend to wash off dirt on out foods, so we consume little or no B12 through our fruit. The most reliable source will always be animal products, because animals aren’t as picky about how clean their food is. None of it really matters, though, because the human body needs very little B12, and most people get way more than enough. Extra B12 is stored in the liver, so you could actually go several years without consuming a spec of the stuff and still be fine. That leads me to my point: Fruitarians (or all vegans, for that matter), will probably be fine for years, or may never get sick from a deficiency of B12, but the danger is still there. This indicates to me that a vegan diet is not a natural human diet. If you don’t want to eat animal products, that’s fine, but don’t pass it off like eating meat is unnatural. :end_rant:
Sorry, I have pernicious anemia, so I’ve done a little research on the subject. Anyways. Excellent list! It reminds me of a diet a local college professor advocates: You eat whatever you want, as much as you want. The theory goes that, once you shed the hangups of proper diet or trying to lose weight, your body will naturally tell you what you need to eat and how much, so that you will eventually be eating healthy without even trying. Somehow, I just don’t think most people are in touch with their bodies enough to make that work.
On last thing: I won’t go into details, but I would recommend anyone that wants to lose weight make sure their livers are working properly. Too much saturated fat reduces liver function, which is terrible because the liver plays a vital role in weight reduction. A lot of people who want to lose weight could see it falling off if they would take fish oil and Vitamin C supplements to help out their liver, and to reduce their intake of saturated fat.
July 15th, 2009 at 2:51 pm
Jfratyer- 105
Wealso live at the bottom of the north island, and i felt nothing, but my sister says she felt it.
July 15th, 2009 at 2:54 pm
Good list Jamie. Amazes me the number of folks with absolutely no common sense.
Copperdragon: I agree but I would change it up a bit. Eat until you’re not hungry any more. You don’t need to be full. I have that fight with my kids – eating because they have room and it tastes good – not because they’re hungry.
July 15th, 2009 at 2:59 pm
breatharism….. I am quite close, but not totally doing this…. I don’t eat breakfast, a little (very little) lunch.. and I finish with an average supper.. works well..
anyway.. it’s a great list
July 15th, 2009 at 3:07 pm
I’m on the Insomniac’s diet! I don’t sleep! My body constantly uses energy, so I eat all I want! No downtime AND I get crap done! — I’m just waiting for a diet like this to come up.
July 15th, 2009 at 3:11 pm
@Sophie (133): Apparently it was noticed in the lower north but it doesn’t say by whom. I was probably asleep when it happened
July 15th, 2009 at 3:22 pm
@E.V. Cunningham (136):
Sounds similar to the “meth” diet.
July 15th, 2009 at 3:40 pm
I’m on a seafood diet-I see food I’ll eat.
OK, bad joke I know.
This is kind of interesting in regards to people on a vegan diet. True vegans do not consume or use anything that comes from animals-no eggs, not even honey. My mom makes soap, and sometimes she uses beef tallow in some of her soaps. She is required by law to list that in the ingredients. That way vegans don’t accidentally get soap with animal fat in it. But she also makes “vegetarian” soaps using oils(olive, coconut, palm)
July 15th, 2009 at 3:41 pm
@ Nicosia (53): “Nature will castigate those who don’t masticate.”
I glanced at this and at first thought it said “masturbate” … Wonder how many calories THAT burns….
It depends on how long you can keep it up.
Australia was on tsunami alert last night. It wouldn’t be the first wave from New Zealand that hit our shores. (It didn’t.)
July 15th, 2009 at 3:42 pm
Is buc slim?
July 15th, 2009 at 4:50 pm
@astraya (139):
Nice
July 15th, 2009 at 5:12 pm
@inappropriate (129):
Heard of a Banana diet but something different from yours. Supposedly, the way of it is you eat a banana and drink two lukewarm glasses of water for breakfast and then you can have whatever you want the rest of the day and still lose weight.
I see a pea in item 3’s plate! Obviously he is not a dedicated Breatharian.
July 15th, 2009 at 5:28 pm
@Randall (122)
I enjoyed your boxer story, especially when the gall bladder exploded and drenched those unlucky souls sitting nearby. There’s nothing worse than used beaver ass juice!
July 15th, 2009 at 5:55 pm
@pac (104): I would have to disagree slightly in regards to the amount of required exercise. If someone currently does NOTHING extra, taking a leisurely 15 minute stroll every day is going to make a huge difference for a while. Telling people that they have to make such a drastic change from their current habits is very intimidating, and can discourage them from even bothering to try (“Well, I can’t commit to 45 minutes a day, so I won’t work out at all” etc…).
It is important to work up to “real” workouts, sweating and all that, but starting small will get results, and will then encourage people to work just a little harder.
July 15th, 2009 at 5:56 pm
It’s much nicer for everyone involved if you process the beaver ass juice into strawberry ice-cream and put that on your pancake.
July 15th, 2009 at 6:06 pm
To joemadre
Let me just say veganism is NOT a diet. Its an ethical lifestyle and encompasses a whole range of things from not eating, wearing, using animal products. Firstly Anyone one who claims to be vegan and flaunts so called vegan dietary restriction isn’t biding by the principle of compassion and respect for others. secondly anyone who claims to be vegan while restricting their choice only to food and continue to wear animal products or use it to justify weightloss in my books aren’t vegan. This lifestyle is tremendously misconstrued
July 15th, 2009 at 6:14 pm
@astraya (144): It’s much nicer for everyone involved if you process the beaver ass juice into strawberry ice-cream and put that on your pancake.
That’s all well and good, but without utilizing proper Fletcherization techniques, it’s akin to feeding cabbage soup to your flatulent tapeworms.
July 15th, 2009 at 6:15 pm
wyllow:
Diet: The usual food & drink consumed by an organism.
Based on that definition, the part of veganism that determines what you do or don’t eat, is the DIET of the vegan person in question. The word diet doesn’t only describe “the food one limits themselves to in order to lose weight”
July 15th, 2009 at 6:19 pm
I’m afraid that probably all of you have eaten the “Last Chance Diet” protein mixture.
gel⋅a⋅tin [jel-uh-tn]
–noun
1. a nearly transparent, faintly yellow, odorless, and almost tasteless glutinous substance obtained by boiling in water the ligaments, bones, skin, etc., of animals, and forming the basis of jellies, glues, and the like.
And from Wiki:
Gelatin is a protein produced by partial hydrolysis of collagen extracted from the bones, connective tissues organs, and some intestines of animals such as domesticated cattle, pigs, and horses.
July 15th, 2009 at 6:20 pm
The stuff in the Last Chance diet thing sounds an awful lot like what they use to make gelatin.
Jello anyone?
July 15th, 2009 at 6:30 pm
@astraya (144):
“It’s much nicer for everyone involved if you process the beaver ass juice into strawberry ice-cream and put that on your pancake.”
ACTUALLY… that’s half of the process that Dow Chemical uses for making Aerogel. The other half involves monkeys.
And is an industrial secret.
So don’t ask.
July 15th, 2009 at 7:27 pm
I’m on the pu**y juice diet.
July 15th, 2009 at 7:39 pm
i didn’t read all the posts…but we spoke about Diet #1 while I was taking Veterinary Parasitology.
in order to contract a tapeworm, swallowing a cyst with the worm in it wouldn’t work. you see, it’s not the adult worm that attached to the intestinal lining-it’s the 2nd stage larval form, either acquired by swallowing the host ectoparasite or undercooked fish or meat infected with the larval forms.
roxanne
July 15th, 2009 at 7:47 pm
@big cock mcgee (151): Geez – why even bother censoring that word?
July 15th, 2009 at 8:54 pm
Eat less. Move more. You now know the secret to staying in shape if your a fatty.
July 15th, 2009 at 9:03 pm
Actually Elvis reportedly gained weight during his sedation.
July 15th, 2009 at 9:23 pm
@Randall (122):
Nice.
Science has yet to come up with a reason why BAJ accumulates in such vast quantities in the gall bladder. They call it the Gomer Pyle syndrome because when the patient undergoes surgery and they cut into the aforementioned organ, the doctors and scientists all shout ‘GaaaaAHHlleee.’ Scientists at the BAJ Gall Bladder Inspection Institute in Schwetty, Ohio are experimenting with laboratory rats to determine daily intake level of BAJ that won’t effect their gall bladders. After months of intense study, Scientists discovered rats don’t have gall bladders and are mortally afraid of beavers and their asses (the laboratory rats, not the Scientists.) Further testing is needed.
Until that great day comes, the FDA has written a memo to some other office declaring BAJ to be safe in moderate levels for human consumption. Provided the beavers don’t mind having their asses scraped. If they do mind they can excrete minute quantities of toxic substances that will damage gall bladders. It’s a defense mechanism that Science has yet to study.
July 15th, 2009 at 9:28 pm
@damien_karras (123):
No… you’re right, Ed. A parachute not opening… that’s a way to die. Getting caught in the gears of a combine… having your nuts bit off by a Laplander, that’s the way I wanna go!
July 15th, 2009 at 9:38 pm
@Jono
“Carbohydrates are completely unessential for life.”
bodybuilder/nutritionist here. where the fuck you get this kind of information? if you have kids or friends dont tell them this please. thank you
July 15th, 2009 at 9:49 pm
The “Korean” diet drives me insane, but seems to work for the little bitty Asians that surround me:
10 pounds of rice and a side of spicy cabbage at every meal. And a few other side dishes, some of which hopefully have some protein in them.
Example: yesterday’s school lunch was rice, rice porridge with chicken in it, kimchi, watermelon, and rice cake for dessert. That’s three rice-based foods, folks, and the only protein was a few shreds of chicken.
I personally need protein to feel full, so when I try to live on these rice-based meals I wind up eating more than I would otherwise, and I’m usually starved by 5pm because the carbs all just go through me. But you’d swear by the way Korean people talk about it that their diet is the best and healthiest on the planet. You should hear these people go on about kimchi (spicy cabbage).
Atkins would kill himself in this country.
July 15th, 2009 at 9:56 pm
$10,000 for someone to tell you not to eat? Anyone stupid enough to pay that guy deserves to die. Bloody oxygen thieves. And chewing liquids?? WTF? Kudos to the bible diet for banning imitation meat though. Any diet that outlaws eating that crap is a-ok in my book. Love number 10. I can use it as an excuse the next time my girlfriend gets on my case about smoking.
July 15th, 2009 at 10:28 pm
@Jessy (159): I love kimchi! I even made some when I was staying in South Korea. It was a lot of fun. You wouldn’t believe how much salt goes into that stuff!
July 15th, 2009 at 11:08 pm
@Travis (11): what a coincidence…your mother likes it rough in the sack as well!
July 15th, 2009 at 11:09 pm
How do i put my picture after my name?
July 15th, 2009 at 11:11 pm
@ Travis (11): what a coincidence…your mother likes it rough in the sack as well!
July 15th, 2009 at 11:14 pm
I’ve had several friends who have been on the maker’s diet. It’s not easy, but the results were extraordinary. I’m a firm believer.
July 15th, 2009 at 11:28 pm
@kazana (163): you can do it on gravatar.com – use the same email address as you use here.
July 15th, 2009 at 11:43 pm
@Nicosia (51): I’ve been on that exercise plan for years. It doesn’t burn that many calories.
July 16th, 2009 at 12:00 am
My high school friend tried #2 and she did lose a lot of weight in 2 week. She became weaker though.
July 16th, 2009 at 1:08 am
I was too lazy to read all the comments tonight so I’ll just put my quick two cents in-today was a long freakin’day-but I remember when my li’l brother was on this incredibly strange diet that a hopeful boxer had relayed to him while my brother was trying to get in the academy to lose weight.
1-Eat all the brown rice you want for six days with no butter or soya sauce
2-Eat all the vegetables on the seventh day but not potatoes
3-Scond week keep the same regimen with the brown rice(again with the brown rice)
4-Eat all the fruit you need to fill you up but no bananas
He swore that this diet helped him get into the academy-not the Star Wars one hahah-and ultimately helped him to shed kilograms and now he is quite successful in his career.
He did mention that it was not healthy and should only be used when meeting a weigh requirement against a deadline. Sooo…not good, quick weight loss; draw your own conclusions.
In the immortal words of Stan Lee: “nuff said”
July 16th, 2009 at 1:11 am
Hahah, I meant weight…I always fug up at least once or more in my postings
July 16th, 2009 at 3:32 am
eeewww…
July 16th, 2009 at 4:06 am
Carbohydrates are absolutely essential to the human diet. Without them we don’t produce sufficient amounts of energy, we would deficient in many vitamins and nutrients(A, B complex, C). In addition, we would poop solid blocks of oil-mess and eventually start to waste away as our body began eating itself to find sugar.
I think what you mean to imply is that refined/heavily processed carbohydrates are a bad thing. No, we do not need refined sugar or processed wheat flour. However, we do need fruits and vegetables and grains as a part of our diet. Without them we lack fiber, a large portion of our water, and we lack energy of any kind.
Paleolithic is definitely the way to go. It’s only extreme if you can’t eat food as it grows. My family grows a large portion of our food, and buy food from local farms. we get bananas, oranges and kiwis from the store, but those don’t grow too well in NW Washington.
July 16th, 2009 at 4:34 am
My friends find it weird that I definitely don’t chew my food. (well the thing is that I am actually on a soft foods only diet for some reason. Maybe I’m just too lazy to chew?)
July 16th, 2009 at 5:11 am
I’m gonna try eating air and see how it goes. Pray for me lol
July 16th, 2009 at 5:55 am
@ Randall (150): I had spent the morning quite contentedly not thinking about aerogel, and since you’ve mentioned it, it’s assumed something the character of a large white whale in my mind.
@ Jessy (159): Hi. I’m back in Australia. I started teaching at an English academy in Sydney this week.
The first time I went to a Korean restaurant I was served a huge meal. I struggled through half of it then gave up. I said to the manager (who spoke some English) “I don’t understand why there aren’t more fat Koreans”. She said “Is vegetables. Is healthy.” (I later found out that it was, in fact, two people’s worth of food. Koreans never eat alone. You can buy some single meals, but generally the serves are set up for two or more people.)
There were a number of large-ish high school students in my classes, but no-one obese. Western diet is encroaching on Korea.
I don’t really like kimchi. I eat it because it’s meant to be good for me and because my wife keeps serving it.
July 16th, 2009 at 6:01 am
@Hungry Person (174): Breatharianism has to be taught to get the best out of it. Like Randall mused back in the comments, it has as much to do with Sun gazing (dawn and dusk) and being able to fully utilise the air using pranayama. This ultimately means the lifestye and breathing-style of the person has to radically change. In Linda Goodmans book Starsigns, she recalls a woman who lived in the alps had been living without eating for quite a few years; although you can imagine how much better alpine air is compared to, say, downtown LA air.
Breatharianism, I suspect, could be extremely unhealthy if you hadn’t had the training.
July 16th, 2009 at 6:03 am
The Paleolithic Diet is the practiced diet of the Transformer co-star Megan Fox. Out of all of these diets, I think that is the most “logical” one of all. But the rest of these diets, man…too crazy!
July 16th, 2009 at 9:28 am
Upon closer inspection – Elvis’s blue suede shoes are loafers. Thus they don’t need tying.
I’d have to question the validity of the statement that Paeleolithic people “didn’t get sick”. Excuse me, was anyone around in 10,000 BC with medical knowledge in order to document this? To test for viruses? I’d love to see their evidence for this claim. Not to mention that most of these early peoples died before they were 40 – some of them must have been getting sick.
July 16th, 2009 at 10:19 am
@Lifeschool (176): I beg to differ – a few years without eating? You die. Someone is either lying or deluded. You actually believe this? But you don’t believe the 50,000+ folks who maintain that 9/11 was not part of a grand conspiracy? That what happened was exactly as it appeared? Oh the irony of it all.
@Bert (178): You are entirely correct; They’ve found prehistoric bones with signs of TB and malnutrition and all variety of defect/disease.
July 16th, 2009 at 11:16 am
“You then worm yourself and poop out the worm”
actually a person who swallowed a tape-worm can’t get rid of it that easy…the head of the worm has some kind of special “teeth” with which they attach to a person’s intestine…while there are ways for a doctor to remove the body of the tape worm from someone (who can grow for meters long..and the procedure usually implies diverse tehnical machinery who are introduced in the person’s….rectum) as long as the head remains attached it will just grow continuously back….so anyone attempting this procedure will have to undergo surgery at some point
July 16th, 2009 at 11:29 am
@jfrater (103): Glad to hear it!!
July 16th, 2009 at 11:34 am
A P.S. to Jamie—It was the predicted subsequent tsunami that really had me worried for you. But later after my post, yesterday, those predictions were repealed.
Anyways–Thanks for the A-OK.
July 16th, 2009 at 12:04 pm
@General Tits Von Chodehoffen (154): But how does it work?
July 16th, 2009 at 1:52 pm
Straight to laughing at his face in number 8
July 16th, 2009 at 2:16 pm
Hubby and I have been eating Paleolithic for a couple of months. Yum bacon and eggs and fried veg for brekky, brazil nuts and fruit to graze on all day, and lots of roast meat and veg. It does get tricky to bring lunch – no more sandwiches, no peanut butter either, or little tubs of yoghurt :O) Results: my skin is gorgeous – used to be really dry and flaky – I assume its the good oils in all the fish, avacado and raw nuts; also I have lost about 8 kilos and am now bang in the middle of the healthy weight for my height. Husband who still has a fair bit to lose is headed in the right direction there as well. And we cheat all the time (a cup of tea and a chocolate last thing at night was not negotiable!)
July 16th, 2009 at 2:56 pm
That made me hungry….
July 16th, 2009 at 3:00 pm
@pac (104): Sorry, but that information isn’t correct. Certain foods do affect how much insulin your body produces – and insulin in excess causes your body to store fat. High refined carbohydrates (pasta, bread, potatoes) will strongly affect your metabolism. And if you are metabolically resistant, like I am, you will have trouble losing weight with exercize. I currently cycle 200 miles a week and restrict calorie intake to no more than 1800, wasn’t able to lose any weight until my Dr started me on thyroid.
Exercize is very important, but a persons metabolism plays a large part in it as well… just sayin’
July 16th, 2009 at 4:09 pm
@ pac (104)
you’re not very nice, are you?
July 16th, 2009 at 4:19 pm
Hey, does anyone know what Prune (the fruit)is called in Hindi or Urdu ?
I’ve searched the net and found different answers that I can’t be sure of. And I even searched it on a dictionary and it also named three different fruits!
July 16th, 2009 at 8:07 pm
@deeeziner (183): Ha ha I assume you saw that skit then.
July 17th, 2009 at 5:24 am
Being fruitarian,Fruitarianism suits me well.I’m going to start it from today….lol
July 17th, 2009 at 5:25 am
The other factor in the “Korean diet” is the “move more” side of the equation. Koreans live non-stop at high speed. Those banquets that Jessy mentioned are consumed at full pace before the party moves on to a bar (with side dishes), a singing room (I shouldn’t say “karaoke” when talking about Korea, but no-one but Jessy would know what “norae bang” meant), then to a roadside food stand (probably ddeokboki). I generally left after the bar, because I had lessons at 6.30 am. (In my new job, I start at 4 pm. Yeah!)
The first “real” Korean (ie not in a textbook) I ever deciphered was a norae bang in George St. I walked along that block a couple of days ago and saw that it was still there. (Unlike some of my favourite book, CD and DVD shops in the city and the suburb where I used to work.)
July 17th, 2009 at 7:51 am
From the Bonus:
“consisted of ground-up and crushed animal horns, hooves, hides, tendons, bones and other slaughterhouse byproducts that were treated with artificial flavors, colors and enzymes to break them down.”
Sounds a lot like the “hotdog and bologna diet”!
July 17th, 2009 at 9:19 am
My micro-biologist sister recommended the cabbage one to me!!! Lol even science people don’t always think things through.
July 17th, 2009 at 11:20 am
Mmmmmmmmmmm….. Cheeeeeeeeese!
Little know FACT that Moon Prime (Earth Prime’s moon) is in deed made of cheese, Swiis Cheese. Send me only $2000, and I will take you there personally!
July 17th, 2009 at 11:49 am
Number 5 (Shangri La) actually helped lots of people lose weight in a healthy way! You won’t lose weight too quickly .. and you don’t get very hungry so you can’t cause a yoyo effect!
Just to add, I have lost weight with Shangri La as well! I’m still eating the same things I did before.
July 17th, 2009 at 12:24 pm
Umm… could I suggest that someone make a list of good diets? Some that have been recommended by doctors, and have been proven to lose weight. I want to reach my goal of 165 by late august!!!
July 17th, 2009 at 3:08 pm
weurd deits on this list
July 17th, 2009 at 4:41 pm
@Maximuz04 (197): high protein (lean meats, chicken, fish) quality carbs (mostly dark veggies), limited calories (1200-1500) daily exercise (30+minutes a day)
July 18th, 2009 at 1:41 am
What about veganism?
lol
July 19th, 2009 at 3:08 am
how about the willpower diet? you know, the one where you just don’t overfeed yourself!
Geez… awesome list though.
July 19th, 2009 at 9:05 am
Astraya: I love me some norae bang! I also love me some kimchi and ddotboki (sp?).
You’re right about Koreans living at a fast pace- especially the men. That must be how this works, because the year’s worth of rice, rice noodles, rice porridge, rice cakes, rice wine and rice drinks have nicely settled in my midsection.
I just find it funny here because Koreans think they have the greatest diet EVER, but definitely way too many carbs for my western sensibilities.
You’re also bang-on with the massive restaurant portions here. As I tend to eat alone pretty regularly, I’ve definitely had to struggle with not totally stuffing myself on a regular basis with meals meant for 2-4 people.
Finally, the Koreans WON’T STOP FEEDING ME! Did this happen to you? Since you’re a guy, you were probably force-fed alcohol as well.
Gee, this seems to have touched a nerve :p.
July 19th, 2009 at 11:43 am
@Maximuz04 (197): “Eat less, move more.”
July 19th, 2009 at 12:42 pm
@gary (8): agreed
i like the sleeping beauty diet. haha elvis used it in his fat elvis period! haha! clearly doesn’t work otherwise it wouldn’t be called his fat elvis period.
July 19th, 2009 at 1:41 pm
The celery thing is called “catablolic” foods that take more calories to digest than they contain. My husband keeps trying to get me to eath those foods, only problem is, he saturates them all in butter, kinda negates the negative calorie thing.
And
I <3 Travis
July 20th, 2009 at 6:13 am
Wow never knew about the Tapeworm diet, i mean come on thats pure genius, people really need to bring that back!!!!!!
July 20th, 2009 at 12:19 pm
@ deeeziner, I have a question for you…you say you only eat small quantities of “bad” foods, then let the kids have the rest. So, what do the kids look like? Why not set a good example for them by serving only healthy foods for ALL of you instead?
@pac – the 2500 calories you indicated isn’t universal, it depends on your height/size. I’m a 50 year-old 5′4″ female – my body only burns about 1700 calories per day.
Just thought I’d throw those comments out there in case anyone took those posts as good weight loss info.
Looking at how teeth are designed tells you what we’re supposed to eat. Carnivores (meat eaters, such as big cats), have pointed teeth designed to tear meat. Vegan (animals) have square teeth to pulverize raw fruits, vegetables and grains. We have both, therefore we’re supposed to eat a variety of foods. Any diet that suggests giving up any of the basic food groups is just a bad idea. The complexity of the human body requires a broad variety of vitamins, minerals, etc. to maintain health.
This was a fun list to read. It’s amazing what people will do to lose weight – as long as they can avoid sensible eating and daily exercise. Unbelievable. I wish you had included the “alli” diet, though. That’s the “spend a lot of money on a pill so you can poop your pants if you eat too much fat” diet.
July 21st, 2009 at 2:03 pm
@tensdiet (207): Much of what you say is true to a point. The problem, of course, is that not every body is equipped to properly digest every food group.
I can’t digest red meats, except lamb (sometimes), nor can I digest the oilier fishes, like salmon or tuna. I’m also lactose intolerant, and can’t digest legumes (bye-bye peanut butter!).
None of these are “diet choices”. They are forced on me by my body. Think you can get away with one tiny mistake? Think again! Your body reacts as if you’d just bombarded it with poison.
There’s no magic bullet as far as weight loss is concerned, but everyone who eats as if they were on a weird “no fat” diet may be eating that way for much more serious reasons than weight loss!
July 22nd, 2009 at 5:08 am
@Morisson4ever (5):
Try exercise and programming your subconscious and eating unprocessed foods.
July 23rd, 2009 at 4:45 pm
Fletcherizing, just make sure not to confuse it with Felching. Butt who knows, maybe one practices the other and vice versa.
July 25th, 2009 at 11:22 pm
laugh at the tapeworm diet…interesting though.
July 26th, 2009 at 7:23 am
I don’t think the caveman diet is that far fetched. It was featured in scientific american a while back and probably the concept behind the atkins diet. (had to be at least 15 years ago I saw it published, but it was prior to the atkins)
Basically it’s just grain/sugars = bad, fruit/protein = good.
Pretty much a common sense diet with a foundation in human evolution to explain why we shouldn’t eat cake/breads/pasta.
Not sure why it’s on the list besides the funny name or whatever…
July 31st, 2009 at 1:31 pm
I have a fun diet idea, it’s called “GYM.”
July 31st, 2009 at 11:29 pm
@apepper
john lennon didn’t die of cancer… he was shot
August 1st, 2009 at 10:32 pm
I think I know someone who is into the paleolithic diet. It sounds like there’s some good logic to it.
Fruititarianism? Why don’t they just throw in the other veggies? Voila, vegan (which has been around awhile). Or at least vegitarian.
Bible diet: yeah, I guess if you’re willing to take some ancient text that literally.
On Fletcherizing[*as i try to stiffle a giggle*], could be something to it. I mean, wouldn’t you get more out of your food if it was chewed completely? Breaks it down. And I guess not eating while angry or sad could by following by taking it to mean don’t eat in excess when you are. To avoid overeating.
Breatharianism: Now, who didn’t know there would be a diet out there like this which would land on the list? I knew it. But did they have to give it a really ridculous name?(sounds like a term someone made up) I think it used to be called Starving Yourself. With the spirituality tacked on later.
Tapeworm diet: heard of it. Not that crazy or despirate.
Last Chance diet: the Prolinn or whatever in the picture looks suspciously like what I threw up several weeks ago. Exactly.
A common element between most of the diets on this list- & with 90% of diets- is all people are looking nowadays is a quick fix. Combined with psudeohealthy, “spirtual” self-help bullshit; still doesn’t completely hide what vanity lies there.
We’re bombarded with commercials for McDonalds & other food messages; Then are taught we’re suppose to freak out if we a pound. Now, people are shunned if they are either an 85 pound skeleton or morbidly obese. It’s all really backward & twisted. Maybe if people who do diet after diet just worked pounds off w/ exercise & eating less, it would provide more perspective into food. Keep self control or on top of it; because they’ll know how truly hard it is to get the weight off.
August 2nd, 2009 at 6:52 am
@pac – of course our metabolisms are different and your medication example doesn’t hold water. We take different doses to get the same results, or even different drugs to receive the same result. While drug A works for some people, others need Drug B. That’s why there are many different thyroid, diabetic, blood pressure, cholesterol, psych, hormone, etc drugs out there.
August 16th, 2009 at 9:45 am
can anyone tell me how 2 gain weight??
August 28th, 2009 at 6:26 am
“Everything in moderation”
Unfortunately, these diets seem to forget that rule.
August 28th, 2009 at 6:55 pm
Yah, these diet people want us to a)die a death of starvation or b)give them loads of giggles and grins.
August 30th, 2009 at 12:08 am
Overall, in my opinion, everyone needs to know their own body, how it works, and what it needs. If you need to lower your portions (most of Americans need this) then lower it. Some people need viguourous (sp?) excercise, some need a brisk walk every other day. I don’t really know many facts on this issue, but I know that everyone is different, so everyone needs different things added or subtracted into their daily life to gain or lose weight.
I used to try many diets…didn’t find any that helped me too much except for extreme excercise and small small portions.
BUT I hate extreme excercise and I love food.
So I negotiated with myself and excercise a little regularily, eat what I want, but don’t overindulge.
I have gained some weight, but overall just decided to be happy with myself =)
September 9th, 2009 at 2:46 am
All you need to do is eat healthy foods, and if you eat junk food, eat it at most once a week. Don’t drive to work/school but istead catch the bus, take the bike, even walk! Also don’t be like some of the people who eat lots of junk food and exercise to keep slim. You still get a great build up of saturated fat, that ends your life pretty quick…
October 12th, 2009 at 2:58 pm
so i’m like 16 and i used to weigh 220 pounds when i was in freshman year
and in the first semester of sophomore year i got super depressed and simply stopped eating more than just breakfast in the mornings and i lost 40 pounds by the time 2nd semester started and now i’m like…. 170 and i’m a junior
yayyy i’m proud of myself
October 21st, 2009 at 10:46 am
crazy people with thier crazy diets ,now after seeing this I think fastfood is a bless
December 17th, 2009 at 1:05 pm
um, to the person who said carbs are absolutely nonessential, i’m wondering how much biology you’ve taken in school. . . um, ya, anyone with even a rudamentary knowledge in biology can tell you that yes, actually, carbs are just as important as any other part of your diet. they are the primary source of energy for your body.
December 30th, 2009 at 8:53 pm
The paleolithic diet is not a crazy diet. It makes a lot of sense to eat foods that humans have consumed for over 100,000 years and eliminate foods that we have only consumed for 10,000 years.
It is insulin raising foods that cause issues. Maasai tribes people are some of the healthiest (proven) people in the world. What do they eat? Mostly animal products from their cattle. They also graze on nuts, berries and seeds. They have almost zero heart disease. Whenever they die young it is usually due to infectious disease or untreated illness. They are lean and super fit. This can said for a lot of “wild” humans consuming paleolithic type diets.
Grains and other insulin raising foods cause obesity and heart disease. It is animal fat that is blamed for these things. But what the early research didn’t look at was that they only cause heart disease when in combination with refined sugar and grains. It is excess insulin caused by increased blood sugar that unleashes the the problems caused by animal products. Recent research supports this 100%.
So instead of saying “I would rather be fat than try any of these diets”, how about looking at the facts. Eliminate most agricultural foods and stick to the outside aisles of the supermarket. What I mean is all but eliminate anything requiring packaging in boxes, cans and packets. Forget potatoes, pasta, noodles, milk, bread, corn, sugar, cheese, cakes, pastry etc. Stick to meat, cruciferous vegies, leafy greens, fruit, nuts, seeds, berries, seafood etc.
These foods provide more than enough carbohydrates, protein, fat and micronutrients. What they don’t do is cause frequent spikes in blood sugar, causing insulin issues.
Doesn’t sound too crazy to me.
Also, Jade, the reason you gained a little weight is the type of food you are likely to be eating. There is really no reason why anyone has to satisfied and accept fat or even a little bit of chubbiness. Extreme exercise isn’t required, just intelligent exercise. Do some strength training, some high intensity intervals (a Tabata is even enough, which lasts four minutes) and fill in the rest with low-level aerobic output like walking (this is how Africans stay lean). Try the paleolithic approach, even just in part. If you want junk food just choose different junk food. Instead of maccas go to KFC and opt for no chips, bread or potato, just have chicken pieces, complete with the fat. Get your carbs from vegies, fruit, nuts and seeds.
By the way, I’m not a crackpot, I’m a strength and conditioning coach, so this comes from experience.
January 2nd, 2010 at 7:14 am
hhhmmmmm….I’m getting fat, I must be on a diet! I really love food…8-)
January 25th, 2010 at 10:52 pm
Holybejeezus.
I can’t believe so many millions of people have such pathetic lives that they dedicate so much time to this. “OMG am I too fat, am I too thin, should I do exercise while I’m watching TV, can I eat this, I can’t eat that, I have to go out to eat ZOMG”
Seriously, shut the fuck up. If you feel crampy and lazy, go for a walk. If you’re hungry, eat the damn cookie. It’s all just a bunch of hydrocarbons, get it together.
January 27th, 2010 at 10:36 pm
Um…bible diet=keeping kosher?
February 8th, 2010 at 9:45 pm
Maybe I should try that sleeping diet….