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[WARNING: contains images that may offend. NSFW] Halloween has finally arrived! As thanks for the suggestions for my own costume this week, I have put together a list to help you all with your costumes – this is a “what not to wear” halloween costumes list. I have to admit that some of them are actually quite hilarious, but all are certain to offend at least one person at a party, or cause people to mock you all night, and there can be no doubt that they are all very unique. If you have photos of your own costumes, be sure to post links in the comments. Happy halloween!
10
Life was like a box of…
9
Words fail me
8
Lots of effort went into this costume
7
Spot the Costume
6
Wrong on every level
Just paying the bills...
5
Sexy harem lady
4
This will definitely offend
3
Woody Alien
2
Labor Pains
1
Diphallia +
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October 31st, 2009 at 1:33 am
Vey Funny list!
October 31st, 2009 at 1:34 am
Sweet. Happy Halloween everyone.
October 31st, 2009 at 1:35 am
What the o_O
October 31st, 2009 at 1:36 am
Whoa,this is getting a bit over the top
October 31st, 2009 at 1:37 am
good thing i already got my 2 year old his costume and didn’t have to borrow any ideas from this list
October 31st, 2009 at 1:38 am
Last halloween a buddy of mine went as a catholic priest with a little boy ragdoll attached face first to his loins. Hilarity ensued at the bars. Great list and Happy Halloween!
October 31st, 2009 at 2:05 am
No.2 is actually pretty smart
October 31st, 2009 at 2:15 am
Number 7 is not a halloween costume but a suggested safety device. Number 6 is from a fetish party, not a halloween costume, as is made fairly clear if you notice that the burning alligator was inserted at some point between the two photos.
October 31st, 2009 at 2:16 am
Now when you have so specifically stated that some images may offend,they don’t offend at all(though it’s a good ploy to evoke a variety of responses) .. But some are like.. Totally disgusting…gaaaah! Are you going to use any of them JF?
October 31st, 2009 at 2:20 am
No.4 is downright hilarious!
October 31st, 2009 at 2:36 am
The contributor has unwittingly admitted a multi-zillionaire company advertising space for free.
October 31st, 2009 at 2:45 am
HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE! AND A LOVELY ALL SAINTS DAY(s) TOO! Well, thanks Jamie and it is really funny. LISTVERSE IS BACK IN HUMOUR! Happy halloween again everyone.
It’s happy here. though there is no trick-or-treat because it’s not in Philippine culuture. Well make sure you go inside the HORROR TUNNEL! :O
October 31st, 2009 at 2:46 am
Hel El the elf. ALL OF THIS IS DEEMED UNWITTINGLY FUNEH! :0
October 31st, 2009 at 2:47 am
Oh no, my comment is the unlucky number 13! above.
October 31st, 2009 at 2:49 am
Well no. 7 is for runaway safety device disguises made for spies.
It’s kinda cool and I am happy to share a link with you. But wait. It’s for spies only… So sorry, suspense.
October 31st, 2009 at 2:50 am
Last year,Heidi klum came at a Halloween dressed up as the Hindu goddess Kali,quite a spectacle she made..
October 31st, 2009 at 2:51 am
sorry to comment so much (just want to outrun Davy in the “About” link) But Jamie, I thought you are going to make a list of TOP TEN FACES OF DEATH LIST? Now there is no Halloween spirit. The spirit is the funny spirit
October 31st, 2009 at 2:53 am
I’ve seen all these before, except Gatorass Dude…
And for that, I’m thankful…
October 31st, 2009 at 2:56 am
@Geronimo1618 (9): at the risk of offending by my language: fuck no!
October 31st, 2009 at 2:58 am
@El the erf (11): do you really think everyone will buy a coke after reading this list?
October 31st, 2009 at 3:26 am
I think there’s more chance of us all buying coke after this list (particularily after seeing no.6).
October 31st, 2009 at 3:36 am
@ Geronimo1618: Now when you have so specifically stated that some images may offend,they don’t offend at all(though it’s a good ploy to evoke a variety of responses)
———————————-
Speak for yourself toots, number 4 is obviously offensive to Muslims that are NOT terrorist bombers. But it’s all in good fun, as long as people are smart enough to not equate explosives with religion…
my favourite is number 2.
October 31st, 2009 at 3:38 am
@H3000 (22): I think I have to agree 2 is the most revolting and therefore the most appealing!
October 31st, 2009 at 3:44 am
Good one Jamie Im sure no. 1 feels like a dick.
October 31st, 2009 at 3:45 am
I suspect number 8 is actually a reproduction of Scout’s ham costume in To Kill a Mockingbird. In which case, it’s a lot cleverer than you are giving it credit for!
October 31st, 2009 at 3:53 am
@jfrater(20) They might as well sue you!
October 31st, 2009 at 3:58 am
To #15
No 7 isn’t for spies. The costume was sold all over Japan as a security device, same as pepper spray or a panic alarm. The theory was that if someone was being chased by muggers or some oter undesirable, they could pop round a corner and quickly assemble the vending machine. You could get other designs, incluidng a telephone box!
October 31st, 2009 at 4:07 am
@H3000 (22): Yeah it IS offensive but it’d be better if Muslims ignore the attempts to ridicule or offend them(or stop making such an issue of it) else they’ll only end up giving others more reason to do..
October 31st, 2009 at 4:09 am
Hey Jamie no. 2 is absolutely revolting AND disgusting
October 31st, 2009 at 4:11 am
Hey Jfrater (20) Don’t tell me you’re drunk again… Hey man it’s Halloween. Don’t say fuck. But it is alright
October 31st, 2009 at 4:31 am
saber25, having a pretty good time,eh??
October 31st, 2009 at 4:36 am
The good ol’ pumpkin costume just got passé…
October 31st, 2009 at 4:48 am
Not sure why, but the HAM made me laugh the most. Probably because of how stupid it was.
October 31st, 2009 at 4:52 am
number 9 is so, uhhh …. detailed
hehehe
and #6 is just sick.
HAPPY HALLOWEEN to everyone, have a fun time outside tonight.
October 31st, 2009 at 4:54 am
@undaunted warrior (24): hahaha great comment!
October 31st, 2009 at 4:55 am
i should be amazed more if number 1 is paired with something that is equally genital…lol
a pussied costume all over…what a relief
October 31st, 2009 at 4:56 am
@saber25 (30): Hmm was it that obvious? As for not saying fuck… fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.
I am the boss – I can say it if I want to! Happy Halloween Saber25 you annoying commenter you! (said, drunkenly, as a form of endearment!)
October 31st, 2009 at 5:02 am
Happy Halloween! Number 1 is really messed up. A huge cock covered in a hundred more cocks? Who in their right mind would wear that?
October 31st, 2009 at 5:04 am
@papo (36): pussied costume lol
October 31st, 2009 at 5:05 am
Um El the erf (31): Yeah, good guess
but not much. I just haven’t went to listverse for a long time. So, you too?
October 31st, 2009 at 5:17 am
That kid in number 4 looks like he’s up to something.
October 31st, 2009 at 5:23 am
@jfrater (37): Good morning Jamie Fuckin Frater.
October 31st, 2009 at 5:23 am
@saber25 (40): It’s Tintin here, dear Haddock! For you,why not!?.. Happi(hic!) halliween!
October 31st, 2009 at 5:27 am
jfrater (37): Lol. Cheers!
October 31st, 2009 at 5:27 am
This list is disgusting.. And hey saber25, I got sum rancid Balut for ya’s, embryo and all.. I figure as long as your doing that your not spewing your retard-like comments.. when the fuck did you filipinas get computers anyway ?
October 31st, 2009 at 5:29 am
and jfrater (37) Have a fucking Halloween Jamie “the fucking drunk” Frater! lol “hic” hehe. Nice way to start a day.
And El the erf (43) Yeah Happy “hic” (fucking) Halloween!
October 31st, 2009 at 5:31 am
Davy,m’boy,yer at nelson.aren’t you gonna do something ’bout it..??
October 31st, 2009 at 5:35 am
Halloween was invented by the Pagans around 1000 B.C. to promote tourism in africa and sell T-shirts to children.
October 31st, 2009 at 5:38 am
Number 1 – is definitely a creep!
October 31st, 2009 at 5:38 am
Three drunks on listverse this morning: jfrater, saber25, and el the erf.
October 31st, 2009 at 5:39 am
Um Miss)Info” Please. I don’t want you to just spoil the day’s fun. So I am not not making retard-so-like comments. And I am a male. My family shares the same account. So I don’t want a fight ok. And I am a FILIPINO. Yep I’ll eat every piece of balut that can be seen. You don’t know what it feels on tasting yummy balut. Hey Jamie, you seeing little Miss_Info’s comment here? Maybe you should do a little exercise-a-grip-keyboard of moderation? See, I am not doing anything, right Jamie? Answer, you’re the fucking boss!
October 31st, 2009 at 5:42 am
yer daz righ’ ol’ Davier’n zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Hey miss_info we know that. How about giving more fuzz than that? (lol and radical and unfigurable, I am top in class when I was in school
October 31st, 2009 at 5:47 am
Funny. But what happened of the promise of a real exorcisms list? oh well, maybe another time.
October 31st, 2009 at 5:53 am
Number 2 is by far the best. I love it.
October 31st, 2009 at 5:53 am
I love number 2 lol
October 31st, 2009 at 5:54 am
Yarg I might just have anuzzer drink, lightsaber.
October 31st, 2009 at 5:59 am
Yeah… Miss Infy, oh yeah..What the *&§!¤ are you tryna’ tell people anyway,uh?!…,Jfrayt is an ancestor of one of those pagans…,eh??
October 31st, 2009 at 6:02 am
Tel ya what…yer bam on target
October 31st, 2009 at 6:03 am
Dem beers are waitin’
October 31st, 2009 at 6:07 am
woot woot..! Pissed and its only 1pm!
October 31st, 2009 at 6:10 am
SABER!!! now were enemies !!! And you’ll get no Balut from me… its mine now!
October 31st, 2009 at 6:11 am
Awesome list! Love number seven, the coke machine, the best. That was very clever.
@Rascalian (6): Holy hell! Was that at Jen’s? If so, I was there! I was going to bring that one up. I still laugh at that picture!
October 31st, 2009 at 6:14 am
@Miss_Info (61): aww das so sweet saber and little miss info
October 31st, 2009 at 6:25 am
Awrigh’ guys,enough overacting already…them seniors will take the stage from here now
October 31st, 2009 at 6:30 am
my favourite is the 2 one
October 31st, 2009 at 6:40 am
You were right…some of these were very offensive.
October 31st, 2009 at 6:51 am
What’s with the ham?
October 31st, 2009 at 6:56 am
its funny how number 6 n 9 r….69er! x
October 31st, 2009 at 7:00 am
Jamie – Davy – I believe that the ham costume was an attempt to replicate Scout in the the movie “To Kill a Mockingbird.” She was wearing that after the church social and she was attacked on the way home when Boo Radley’s parents decided it was ok for him to get some fresh air and he put the beatdown on her would-be assailant.
As for most of the rest of what you presented Jamie, there are some things you can’t ‘unsee.’ I’m trying to put drops of chlorine into my eyes to burn out the images and my five gallon bucket is now full of bile. At what point does a person look at the fangs and the cape and say to themselves, ‘that’s just boring and pedestrian . . . what a minute, I’ll stick something in my ass!!”
October 31st, 2009 at 7:08 am
Great lists this week, I’ve enjoyed them all tremendously. Number 2 on here is beyond! And number 6 is hmm beyond beyond… very Halloween, though, brings horror and confusion.
October 31st, 2009 at 7:09 am
Happy Halloween!
October 31st, 2009 at 7:10 am
This one time . . . at band camp . . . I shoved a ‘gator in my ass!
October 31st, 2009 at 7:22 am
Excuse my vernacular, but…
Holy shit!
I definitely don’t want to go to the Halloween parties people with these costumes go to…
October 31st, 2009 at 7:28 am
I knew that’s where the ham was from! They did a good job replicating it!
Hey Jamie- What the fuck is your costume? I’m gonna be a fuckin’ zombie bride tonight!
October 31st, 2009 at 7:31 am
I can about guarantee that none of these people got laid at the party….
October 31st, 2009 at 7:42 am
Wow, funny list, but also cringe-worthy… that penis costume was just… a dick move.
So how ’bout 3/4 of the comments coming from one person? Eh?
October 31st, 2009 at 7:45 am
@Nicosia (75): Idk… that dick could have gotten laid, even on accident!
October 31st, 2009 at 7:57 am
@ianz09 (77) I agree with your second sentence, in your comment maybe JF should start a 2nd LS just for whipper snappers, featuring Noddy and Big ears, and the rest.
October 31st, 2009 at 7:58 am
jfrater – I shall take your post to mean that I can safely say, my eyes started to fucking bleed when I read this list in my email.
October 31st, 2009 at 8:07 am
Love #4. And of course it’s offensive. That’s why I like it!!!
October 31st, 2009 at 8:30 am
That is disgusting
October 31st, 2009 at 8:39 am
I concur with #25 and #69. The ham costume is an homage to To Kill a Mockingbird. Classic scene.
October 31st, 2009 at 8:58 am
@General(81) what is disgusting ???
October 31st, 2009 at 8:59 am
A good list, but some costumes were totally offensive. I got the reference to To Kill a Mockingbird too, that was great.
October 31st, 2009 at 9:04 am
The vending machine is awesome!
I used to work in a costume shop, and I think my favoritest costume of all time was “The Shocker”. It was a giant hand that had nothing whatsoever to do with electricity!
October 31st, 2009 at 9:10 am
Hey Rascalian (#6)
My mom and dad went to a church dressed as a priest and a pregnant nun. It sounds alike. Of course, people are allowed to laugh at bars…
October 31st, 2009 at 9:16 am
Not at all how I envisioned a Lizard Man costume. Not even close. Did anyone take a look at the folks in the background? Sure looks like he’s at the wrong party eh? Other than the guy in the pink bunny suit (furries anyone?) of course.
Woody Alien is very clever – and less disturbing than just a regular picture of him with his wife/daughter.
Notice how Dick-man’s face looks like many a superhero – The Tic, Mr. Incredible, etc. I never noticed the ball-chin before. Well I noticed the cleft chin, but not that it is testicular in origin. Interesting.
I am kind of curious as to what parent would allow their little kid to dress up as a suicide bomber; teenagers would think of it on their own but me thinks the little guy was put up to it. That makes it not so funny eh?
The preggers belly is just a little too deja-vu for me – all my kids were born by c-section and it does look just a tad similar. At least from my perspective.
Happy Halloween! Too bad that they don’t have it in The Phillipines – me thinks El and Saber are missing out on a ton of candy. lol.
October 31st, 2009 at 9:26 am
@mom424(87) Your last sentence tasted sweet.
October 31st, 2009 at 9:38 am
@Jfrater (19): @jfrater (37): Hang on… Jfrater with a capital J… and jfrater, all lower case… ??????
Am I missing something?
October 31st, 2009 at 9:44 am
Funny list !
Some of the pics are in common with this list :
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/10/14/the-most-inappropriate-ha_n_317731.html
Also, does anyone find the suicide bomber getup somewhat similar to Tin Tin’s or Prince Abdullah’s appearances in Tin Tin in the Land of Black Gold ?
October 31st, 2009 at 10:23 am
I think the Ham costume is a reference to scouts costume in To Kill A Mockingbird
October 31st, 2009 at 10:27 am
WTF !! ,LOL,1,2,3,4,(Hit cha with a 6&9)it does get any
better,happy “freaky” halloween.
October 31st, 2009 at 10:33 am
i nearly went as a suicide bomber, but was talked out of that one. So as a last minute thing I am going in full three piece suit, dead guy makeup, and a noose around my neck. I only have to explain it to virtuous, wholesome people, which comprises most of the regulars here, I am certain. So dressed up hanged man=well hung.
why yes, I just might get a visit from Miss No Means No!
October 31st, 2009 at 10:39 am
Number 8 wasn’t a last minute idea. It was a recreation of Scout Finch’s costume in To Kill A Mocking Bird.
October 31st, 2009 at 10:41 am
terror kid is hilarious. i’m thinking i might dress like that next year instead of my plans for being the afro of haywood nelson.
October 31st, 2009 at 10:44 am
PIC No 1,man propably Wanks approx. 100 times a day !
October 31st, 2009 at 10:45 am
A friend of mine was once 8 1/2 months pregnamt on Halloween and I begged her to be a nun or a girlscout. She didn’t do it. She was no fun.
October 31st, 2009 at 10:51 am
Disgusting but very good !
October 31st, 2009 at 11:03 am
Hammmmm……
October 31st, 2009 at 11:05 am
Lololol holy shit i couldnt stop laughin… till the baby bustin thru
the pregnant chik. Thats a freaky costume very Halloweenish
October 31st, 2009 at 11:55 am
Jfray!!!!! Happy Halloween, love the list and everything, but are you EVER gonna update Cogitz again??? Today woulda been the perfect day to surprise your readers of THAT blog with a new post! We miss you ovah there!
October 31st, 2009 at 12:06 pm
[deleted]
October 31st, 2009 at 12:49 pm
oh……. uhm…. yuck??
gross!! happy halloween guys
October 31st, 2009 at 1:24 pm
Please kill me.
October 31st, 2009 at 1:29 pm
#2 is totally disturbing. But number 1 is hilarious.
October 31st, 2009 at 1:39 pm
#2 is Bella Swan, no?
October 31st, 2009 at 2:08 pm
Number one is a fag lol
October 31st, 2009 at 7:02 pm
M&Ms are tasty yo
October 31st, 2009 at 7:30 pm
Ummm… number 4 is very disturbing. Love the suicide bomber!!!!!
October 31st, 2009 at 7:53 pm
Loved #8…a nod to “To Kill a Mockingbird”
October 31st, 2009 at 8:33 pm
MY EYES!!! MY EYES!! They’re bleeding!!!!
October 31st, 2009 at 10:33 pm
No. 8 the ham is, without a doubt, “Scout” from To Kill A Mockingbird. Every year I tell my students I’ll give them extra credit if they dress up as a ham for Halloween. And no one ever has…until now!
November 1st, 2009 at 12:43 am
that’s just disgusting… halloween is getting erotic or what?
November 1st, 2009 at 1:27 am
Hello. I am back. Happy (or sad) All Spirits Day! Well Miss_info (61) Hmm, so, yep, there’s more balut here so they are all mine BWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
So, peace talk now? Peace _\/.. 
So, wanna go out? JOKING!
November 1st, 2009 at 1:31 am
Thanks Davy (63) Yeah that’s right.
So El, have you got the hungover yet? I got one already.
November 1st, 2009 at 1:35 am
hey ianz09 (89): Two possible answers, Jamie has two accounts (of course, hes the fucking boss!) or maybe you had been drunk like us three.
So what now Miss_Info? Answer me yet? 
JOKING!
November 1st, 2009 at 2:00 am
@saber25 (115): the hangover…yeah the hangover.. hammers donkin’ the bell in ma head in the morn after….but that ain’t gonna stop me for more!
over to next list!
November 1st, 2009 at 4:58 am
Oh god, thank god I live in Australia
November 1st, 2009 at 6:26 am
Miss info ain’t replying
November 1st, 2009 at 6:59 am
What the hell is that man doing with an alligator up his rectum?
Holy heck… some people really like to SCARE. Lol hilarious list to be honest.
November 1st, 2009 at 7:12 am
Lol lol I have to say I really did laugh out loud. Yes, lots of these are quite offensive, but still hilarious in their own way. There’s a couple I might actually wear, but the others are too over the top and open to mockery. Good job with this list of things not to wear. Hahaha, wow.
November 1st, 2009 at 8:13 am
@saber25 (116): Well… I don’t drink, but he IS the boss. Unless somebody spiked my Dr. Pepper…
November 1st, 2009 at 10:10 am
Wow, I admit these are great to choose one of them
November 1st, 2009 at 10:36 am
These are seriously funny. I think the “labor pains” one is the best.
November 1st, 2009 at 11:54 am
labor pains is one of the best picture. sad , and funny
November 1st, 2009 at 1:25 pm
Hilarious list!! Some truly ingenius costumes there.
November 1st, 2009 at 2:47 pm
Most of these costume choices are wrong on so many levels!! The guy at number 9 is just a psycho-analyst’s dream client. I have never seen anyone going as their mother in quite that “conception” of the phrase before…and as for the old man in number 6 I think he just misunderstood what type of party he was attending…Great list
Don’t know how you found them but I commend you for the efforts…sheilawenninger
November 1st, 2009 at 2:52 pm
Wow. I don’t know what I would do if I saw any of those people out on Halloween…
November 1st, 2009 at 3:20 pm
oh hell to the no. i feel slappin that lil white boy in number 4. he is just askin for someone to blow his ass up. lmao
November 1st, 2009 at 4:26 pm
Actually, #8 could just be a clever reference to “To Kill a Mockingbird”. Didn’t Scout dress up as a ham towards the end of the book?
November 1st, 2009 at 5:15 pm
Indeed, sometimes words are not enough.
The vending machine and box of chocolates ones were really good. The labor pains one is well done.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:18 pm
I think I need sex. I just got really turned on by picture no1.
November 1st, 2009 at 5:51 pm
Words fail me!
November 1st, 2009 at 11:14 pm
#2 is pretty creative.. thumbs up james!!
and Words fail me,thts so disgusting….
November 1st, 2009 at 11:32 pm
#2, its for sure..
November 2nd, 2009 at 1:31 am
I wish I could dress as something without being hurt by my father’s hard, angry hands.
November 2nd, 2009 at 1:48 am
Isn’t number 8 suppose to be that one costume Scout Whore from the movie To Kill a mocking Bird?
and my fav’ costume among all is number 2.
November 2nd, 2009 at 4:39 am
This sucks big time!!!
November 2nd, 2009 at 6:19 am
Geronimo (28): Yeah it IS offensive but it’d be better if Muslims ignore the attempts to ridicule or offend them(or stop making such an issue of it) else they’ll only end up giving others more reason to do..
What a joke, instead of rebuking people for offending in the first place, you’re now asking the people being ridiculed to ignore it or not make ’such an issue of it’. That seems fair…
November 2nd, 2009 at 7:23 am
Thanks a lot… My brain is now permenantly damaged from this shite.
November 2nd, 2009 at 5:32 pm
Number eight is definitly from To Kill a Mockingbird. That’s super clever. I always say POOOoo-ORRkk!!
November 2nd, 2009 at 11:41 pm
This has probably been said already, but the HAM costume is not stupid at all. It’s a reference to Scout’s costume in Harper Lee’s To Kill a Mockingbird. The woman even has Scout’s severe, short bangs. I found it quite clever and don’t think it should be on this list at all. I suspect the contributor didn’t realize it was a literary reference. Otherwise, it is a pretty stupid costume.
November 3rd, 2009 at 5:23 pm
Please tell me that I’m not the only one that is completely and utterly disturbed by No. 9 and No. 1. Though I do give them props, they are very unique and original costume designs. Few people would attempt those.
No. 2 is my all time favorite. Most certainly horror flick worthy that’s for sure!
November 6th, 2009 at 2:57 am
I like the bomb costume. It’s pretty easy to do and it’s unique.
November 9th, 2009 at 10:17 am
please tell me someone noticed that ‘labor pains’ was a nod to breaking dawn…and yes, i am a fan of twilight…sorry…
November 9th, 2009 at 10:20 am
ok i just saw that ‘C’ #106 got the twilight reference…
November 10th, 2009 at 7:25 am
Hey! I know the girl who got number 9.
November 10th, 2009 at 11:45 am
I utterly hate Twilight. Sorry.
November 13th, 2009 at 12:59 pm
Number 1 Really pisses me off!!!