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10 Crazy Teachers in Pop Culture
Teaching is a thankless job. After working years to earn your degree, you must then deal with rambunctious kids who couldn’t be less interested in learning. Worse, the pay rates for this hardship are mediocre at best. These hurdles are enough to drive anyone crazy. Writers sometimes take notice of that.
Fiction has given us numerous nutty teachers over the years. Their insanity usually lies in their behavior or curriculum. They might have some bizarre quirk to their deliveries, or they could impose tyrannical rules on pupils. Then again, they may just have some strange hobbies on the side. All of these traits affect their students, often injuring or traumatizing them beyond repair. These crimes would naturally lead to teachers losing their licenses in real life. In fiction, though, their loony lessons are just fun to watch.
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10 Professor Trelawney
“Colorful” is the word for most teachers at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Even by that standard, though, Professor Trelawney is a fruity figure. The Divination teacher specializes in predictions through tea leaves, palm reading, and star gazing. She’s basically a glorified fortuneteller. Suffice it to say, she probably sees stars on a daily basis.
Trelawney is the very image of a crazy cat lady. Her unkempt hair, thick glasses, and chaotic wardrobe are enough to drive most people off. The rest have to put up with her neurotic noises and random asides. She regularly predicts misfortune on her students, delivering her prophecies in the most ominous ways possible without a care for their feelings. This professor is truly in her own little world.[1]
9 Mr. Crocker
In all fairness, Mr. Crocker’s craziness emerges outside the classroom in The Fairly OddParents. That’s not to say that he shirks his duties, though. He thoroughly enjoys handing out failing grades to his students, taking great pleasure in their misery. It doesn’t matter if they do well or not; he has a ready supply of “F” grades stashed in his desk. Of course, his true passion lies elsewhere.
More than anything, Crocker believes in fairy godparents. He’s so passionate in his belief that he manically shouts about their existence to anyone who’ll listen. More directly, he concocts countless evil schemes to track and capture the magical creatures. These plans get increasingly ridiculous with every failure. Granted, he’s right about fairies being real, but his deranged demeanor doesn’t convince anyone.[2]
8 Ms. Frizzle
This teacher isn’t mean or oppressive, but she more than makes up for those traits through child endangerment. Ms. Frizzle is an energetic soul. She believes in a hands-on approach to education, rejecting the sterile dullness of the classroom in favor of daily field trips. That prospect sounds exciting, but these journeys aren’t just walks in the park.
Driving the eponymous Magic School Bus, this wild woman takes her students to fantastic locales they can only dream of. One day, they might dodge dinosaurs in prehistoric times. Another day, they could swim through a person’s bloodstream. These scenarios are obviously dangerous, but the impending death of her students doesn’t seem to bother Ms. Frizzle at all. She just laughs off every peril without a care in the world. That’s not the attitude you want for the person watching your kids.[3]
7 Ms. Bitters
Invader Zim crafts a demented world to begin with, but arguably, the greatest terror lies in school. Ms. Bitters is a haunting presence. She appears and disappears from the shadows, and she looms over students like a lanky vulture. She seems more wraith than human, making it impossible to relax in the classroom. Believe it or not, she only gets more unsettling as you get to know her.
“Bitters” is as good a name as any. This teacher utterly despises children, and she has no qualms about saying so. Nothing would please her more than for them to die horrible deaths. The kids even theorize that she descends from a species of flesh-eating insects. That certainly tracks with the bugs crawling over her face, and it comes to a head in the characters’ nightmares, where she’s a shape-shifting bug queen who consumes kids. Whether the rumors are founded or not, Ms. Bitters is ominous enough to terrify the titular alien tyrant. That’s saying a lot.[4]
6 Walter White
Hardship can warp the best men. Instructors are no exception to that rule, as Walter White learns in Breaking Bad. This chemistry aficionado teaches at J.P. Wynne High School, but it’s far from an ideal position. Disrespectful students and financial problems regularly demoralize him. The nail in the coffin comes from a terminal cancer diagnosis. These woes push White over the edge.
Upon discovering his former pupil’s drug business, Walt decides to get in on the action. His chemistry expertise lets him make the best crystal meth around. Unfortunately, the inherent danger means he must take increasingly drastic measures to survive. These events morph him into a ruthless killer. Soon, the humble teacher becomes the region’s leading drug lord. Talk about a career change.[5]
5 Jin Kuwana
Bullying harms kids the world over, but it can also affect teachers. Such is the case with Yu Kitakata. In Lost Judgment, his classroom is the site of merciless mocking. The instructor brushes it off as normal, but the targeted boy eventually attempts suicide and winds up in a coma. The whole incident demonstrates inexcusable negligence on Kitakata’s part, resulting in a guilty conscience and his unceremonious firing. Sadly, he learns the wrong lesson from the ordeal.
Changing his name to “Jin Kuwana,” the former teacher goes on the warpath. He ruthlessly exacts vigilante justice against Japan’s bullies and anyone who sanctions it. He even helps disgruntled parents torture and kill the tormentors without batting an eye. As an added insult, he blackmails his comatose student’s bullies to aid in his crusade. The tale is a classic case of fighting fire with fire.[6]
4 Ra’s al Ghul
This immortal warrior wants to make the world a better place. Ra’s al Ghul leads an elite group of fighters with the sole intention of achieving that goal. He teaches them the ways of hand-to-hand combat, ninjutsu, and deception. Certain continuities even position him as Batman’s master. His centuries of knowledge and experience are invaluable sources of learning. Unfortunately, what he uses these gifts for is less than ideal.
The villain’s method of saving the world often lies in genocide. He’s willing to purge large portions of humanity to restore the planet’s purity or restart a failing society. What’s worse is that he imbues this warped worldview into his pupils, creating a doomsday cult with unparalleled skills as killers. The cherry on top is the Lazarus Pit. Bathing in its mystical waters helps Ra’s maintain his youth, but it also robs him of what little reason he has. A megalomaniac is dangerous at the best of times, but an immortal one is a disaster waiting to happen.[7]
3 Miss Trunchbull
Given that she stems from a Roald Dahl tale, Miss Trunchbull is naturally twisted. The headmistress of Crunchem Hall Elementary School hates kids with every fiber of her being. She despises them so much that she denies ever having a childhood. Even the most well-behaved individuals—the titular Matilda—are pure evil in her eyes. Don’t think she doesn’t act on those impulses.
Trunchbull abuses her students in the most ludicrous ways. One moment, she might force a heavyset boy to eat an entire chocolate cake. In another scene, she swings a girl around by her pigtails and tosses her like a hammer throw. These punishments are equal parts horrific and cartoonish. What’s worse is that they’re entirely unfounded. Trunchbull tortures these kids purely out of spite.[8]
2 Darth Sidious
The Sith aren’t exactly the nicest guys. Even so, Darth Sidious is the pinnacle of evil. Throughout the Star Wars saga, he works to subjugate the galaxy under his own brand of order. It doesn’t matter how many people he has to kill. He gladly slaughters those who resist and enslaves those who don’t. What’s more is that he takes pleasure in his sadistic actions, laughing maniacally at his own misdeeds. Equally demented is how he treats his allies.
Sidious uses and loses people without remorse. He trains several Sith apprentices, imparting the secrets of the Dark Side and commanding them to carry out his Machiavellian schemes. Not only does he delicately play on their fears, but he sometimes indoctrinates them from a young age. Planting those seeds makes these students supremely loyal, but their master doesn’t hesitate to dispose of them once they outlive their usefulness. Keep in mind, it’s the Jedi who discourage attachment, yet this Sith Lord couldn’t be more selfish if he tried.[9]
1 Everyone at James K. Polk Middle School
It pays to have a few pointers in your teenage years, especially in a school as unhinged as this. Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide is a chaotic show. That chaos comes down to cliques, bullies, assignments, and lunches. All these aspects are a cut above real life. Oddly enough, though, the greatest obstacle lies in the classroom.
James K. Polk Middle School has numerous nutcases on its staff. Examples include a woodshop teacher who cut off his own hand, a science teacher who performs explosive experiments, and a gym coach who loves seeing kids hurt each other. With these guys in charge, any moment can turn a routine class into a horror show. On the one hand, it ensures that kids pay attention. On the other, it risks scarring them for life. Then again, that’ll happen at some point anyway, so why not start early?[10]