The 5 Stages of Embalming
Published on November 8, 2007 - 129 Comments
[WARNING: Contains disturbing images] Okay - this is a fairly morbid topic but a very interesting one. Embalming is not required by law in many countries, but it is often performed for the benefit of loved ones. An embalmer has the very responsible task of ensuring that family members are not left with an undesirable last memory of their loved one. These are the five steps involved in the embalming process.
1. Pre-Embalming
At anytime, day or night, the funeral professional may be called upon to do his or her job. People have a tendency to die at the most inconvenient times, and a mortician cannot wait until later to retrieve a body. This means lots of getting up at 1 AM and having to work on holidays.
When someone dies and once authorization has been granted by the family, doctor, and/or by the medical examiner, the embalmer is called to make the “removal” of the body. After filling out the appropriate paperwork the embalmer takes the body to the funeral home, and if embalming is requested or required, begins the process.
An embalming report is filled out that logs all jewelry and personal items on the body; details any discolorations, cuts, bruises, etc. on the body; and documents the procedures and chemicals used during embalming. This report can become very valuable if a deceased’s family bring a lawsuit against the funeral home.
All clothing, bandages, IV needles, catheters and such are removed. A strong disinfectant spray is used to clean the skin, eyes, mouth, and other orifices. If rigor mortis (the stiffening of muscles after death) has set in, it is relieved by moving the limbs and head about and massaging the muscles. If the decedent is a man, he is normally shaved at this point. Razor burn (yes, not even death can save you from this) is less likely before the arterial chemical firms the skin of the face. Even women and children are shaved to remove the fine “peach fuzz” we all have on our faces. This is done to avoid the makeup from collecting on the hair and making the makeup more noticeable.
2. Feature Setting
Next begins the process of placing the facial features and the body itself in the position it will remain in the casket for viewing. This is done before arterial embalming, because the body will be truly “set” - firmed in position once formaldehyde reaches the tissues.
Great care is taken to close the eyes. The traditional method for doing this involves placing a bit of cotton between the eye and eyelid. Many times after death the eyes sink back into their sockets, so small plastic “eye caps” are placed on each eye ball. A small amount of stay creme is placed on the eyecap to avoid dehydration of the eyelids. Contrary to popular myth, the eyelids are never sewn shut, but in some cases that may be glued together to prevent separation.
The mouth is closed either by tying the jaw together with a piece of suture string or by a special injector gun. With the suture method, a curved needle with a piece of suture string is threaded through the jaw below the gums, stuck through upper jaw into to the right nostril, threaded through the septum of the nose into the left nostril, and then passed back down into the mouth. The two ends of suture are tied, careful not too tightly, so that a natural appearance of the mouth is created.
To finish closing the mouth, many times a mouth former is used. A mouth former is similar to an eyecap as it has a textured side that grips the lips, but it is shaped like the mouth. A small amount of stay creme is also used on the mouth to avoid dehydration and help hold the lips in place. The mortician may also squeeze inside the mouth a little mastic compound, a paste kind of like caulk to give the mouth a better and more pleasing shape.
3. Arterial Embalming
Arterial embalming is begun by injecting embalming fluid into an artery while the blood is drained from a nearby vein or from the heart. The two gallons or so needed is usually a mixture of formaldehyde or other chemical and water. In the case of certain cancers, some diabetic conditions, or because of the drugs used prior to death (where body deterioration has already begun), a stronger or “waterless” solution is likely to be used for better body preservation. Chemicals are also injected by syringe into other areas of the body.
Once the embalming fluid begins to flow into the arterial system, pressure begins to build up in the entire vascular system. This helps the fluid reach all parts of the body and penetrate into the tissues. Evidence of this can be seen in bulging veins throughout the body. The jugular drain tube is opened periodically (it is normally closed) to allow blood to escape and prevent too much pressure in the vascular system which could cause swelling. The blood drains directly into the sewer system, which sounds gross, but in reality much worse things go into our sewers.
Once arterial injection has been completed, the arterial and jugular tubes are removed, the vessels are tied closed, and the incision used to access the vessels is sutured closed and sealed with a special chemical.
4. Cavity Embalming
Arterial fluids mainly treat the skin, muscles, and organs themselves. What’s inside the organs (such as urine, bile, etc.) begins to decompose. Gases and bacteria can build up and cause distention, odor, and purge (such as brown fluids coming out of the mouth - not exactly the way you want to remember grandma). These bacteria can sometimes spread to other parts of the body, even after arterial embalming, causing decomposition problems (and then sometimes legal problems for the funeral home).
Cavity treatment starts with aspirating (suctioning) fluids out of the internal organs in the abdomen and thoracic cavity. This is accomplished this with the use of a trocar. The embalmer uses it to puncture the stomach, bladder, large intestines, and lungs. Gas and fluids are withdrawn before “cavity fluid” (a stronger mix of formaldehyde) is injected into the torso. The anus and vagina may be packed with cotton or gauze to prevent seepage if necessary. (A close-fitting plastic garment may also be used.)
These steps apply only to a body that has not been autopsied. During autopsy all the internal organs are removed and inspected by the medical examiner and then placed back inside the body or sometimes incinerated. At the funeral home, the mortician removes the viscera and places it in a plastic bag called a “viscera bag” and allows it to soak in cavity chemical. The inside of the body cavity is aspirated with a special instrument and then coated with an embalming gel and/or an embalming powder. The treated organs are then placed back inside the body or the bag full of organs gets placed at the foot end of the casket (so never try to admire a deceased’s shoes!)
5. Post-Embalming
The body and hair are washed once more to remove any blood or chemicals and then thoroughly dried. Any restorations are done now, such as rebuilding features, masking sores or abrasions, etc. Makeup gets applied to the face, neck, and hands. Either a translucent makeup is used in normal cases or an opaque makeup is applied if the skin is discolored. In either case, the effect should be a subtle as possible to avoid Uncle Roger looking like Aunt Rose. The fingernails are trimmed. The hair is styled, either by the embalmer or by a professional hairdresser or barber.
The remains are dressed in the outfit chosen by the family. This outfit almost always includes underwear, shoes, and socks. In the case of autopsy or other difficulties, plastic undergarments are placed on the body to prevent leakage.
Finally comes casketing. The body is placed into the casket and posed in the proper position. The family normally views the body at this point and decides on any changes that need to be made. During the viewing period (which can sometimes last for several days) the embalmer will periodically check the body for signs of decomposition and takes any corrective action.
Source: Everything you ever needed to know about Embalming. Images are copyright Edmond Terakopian
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1. mix2323 - November 8th, 2007 at 10:04 am
wow i don’t think i could do that for a living
2. jfrater - November 8th, 2007 at 10:11 am
I was actually quite interested in it at High School but now - no - definitely not for me.
3. DiscHuker - November 8th, 2007 at 10:11 am
pretty gross but extremely interesting. i never really thought about what happens to granny between the old folks home and the cemetary.
how do you know all of this stuff? are you a mortician?
p.s. “stay creme” is this a nice word for glue?
4. xdarkhorsex - November 8th, 2007 at 10:24 am
a question that comes to my mind when I that the blood goes into the sewer system is what happens if the person had AIDs or other communicable disease? Does that blood get treated any differently?
5. zombiejorge - November 8th, 2007 at 10:25 am
wow, real compeling stuff. the amount of care taken just to provide a piece of mind for the family is really something. you have to respect a profession like that.
6. jfrater - November 8th, 2007 at 10:40 am
DiscHuker: yes - I think stay creme is a cosmetic glue
xdarkhorsex: that is a really good point actually - though I think HIV can’t live outside the body so that is possibly not a danger - but I am not sure about other diseases like Hepatitis. I am really surprised that there is not some requirement to purify before dumping.
zombiejorge: totally - and for the most part their work is appreciated for only a few days then lost.
7. TerranRich - November 8th, 2007 at 11:11 am
But those few days create memories that last a lifetime. Trust me on that one.
I’ve been to quite a few open-casket funerals…all for relatives of my best friend, sadly, and the work they do is amazing, considering how they’d normally look a few days or weeks after death.
8. xdarkhorsex - November 8th, 2007 at 11:45 am
Ahh I have found the answer to my own question at http://www.ccohs.ca/oshanswers.....dures.html
Treat blood, body fluids and aspirated contents with a 5.25% sodium hypochlorite solution for 30 minutes before flushing directly into sewer.
9. xdarkhorsex - November 8th, 2007 at 11:46 am
one other fascinating way of preparing the body for the morbidly inclined is plastination.
10. Juggz - November 8th, 2007 at 11:48 am
I wonder what kind of training this would require, Medical background, etc. I have always been interested in doing something like this(not not some morbid fascination, just a fascination).
11. xdarkhorsex - November 8th, 2007 at 11:49 am
you don’t necessarily need a medical background, however you have to take an embalmer’s course and be licensed. (I looked into it also when I was younger)
12. Randall - November 8th, 2007 at 11:53 am
I dated a girl in college whose ambition it was to become an undertaker. I believe she did it too. Creeped me out then, creeps me out now. Though of course this is one of those “facts of life” (or death) things that have to be taken care of. Nevertheless…
13. Kelsi - November 8th, 2007 at 11:54 am
…….ew!
It really sounds like an art though, so many subtleties. Unusual, but interesting nonetheless.
14. jfrater - November 8th, 2007 at 12:05 pm
TerranRich: I have been fortunate enough to have not seen a single dead person - but your comment makes me think - maybe we should have an annual embalmers day - to appreciate the work they do - instead of all of the glitzy money making holidays that the media and advertising companies get us in to.
xdarkhorsex: thanks for that link - fascinating! Thought one of their points confuses me a little:
Why? In case you infect the next corpse with aids? Also - that list is really scary - if that is what you have to do for a person with AIDS, imagine the procedure for Ebola!
Also xdarkhorsex, how long is an embalmer’s course?
Randall: I was interested in high school too - but the interest waned and I ended up in IT.
15. DiscHuker - November 8th, 2007 at 12:08 pm
from darkhorse’s link … “Spit out immediately blood or body fluids splashed in the mouth. Rinse mouth with water.”
that’s one of the most disturbing visuals i’ve ever had
**shiver**
16. dvhann - November 8th, 2007 at 12:15 pm
you know what is weird? i was just watching a show on embalming last night on the health network..and this morning i log onto here to see a list for embalming. creeepy.
17. jfrater - November 8th, 2007 at 12:42 pm
DiscHuker: yeah - how often does that happen? Any remnant of an interest in the job went out the window when I read that.
dvhann: ooooh - maybe you are destined to be an embalmer!
18. JOE ROSSON - November 8th, 2007 at 12:50 pm
I wonder how much an embalmer makes, does he get paid by the body or hourly?This would be a good episode for good ol Mike Rowe and Dirty Jobs.
19. xdarkhorsex - November 8th, 2007 at 3:12 pm
in most funeral homes the embalmer does other jobs as well.
I do believe that there are several different types of courses you can take, ranging from 6 months to 2 years.
20. Ravyn - November 8th, 2007 at 7:36 pm
It is definatly incredible how painstakingly the embalmer does his/her job. It was something I thought about when I was in school. bah
21. Mathilda - November 8th, 2007 at 7:48 pm
I cannot stand open casket viewings; I hate them with a passion. I’ve been to coworkers’ and friends’ family members viewings; they always insist upon taking you over to view the body of some person that you didn’t know - I always have a horrible urge to pick up the corpse’s hand, shake it and say “Nice to meet you”. Then there’s the obligatory comments about how “peaceful” they look. They don’t look peaceful, they look DEAD! And usually, kind of orange. And then everyone starts seeing their relatives and old friends and laughing and telling stories, so the whole thing turns into an interesting atmosphere of a cocktail party. You know, if you have the kind of cocktail parties where a dead person is the centerpiece.
Worst of all is when the family decides to have an open casket viewing and the body is not at all in a condition which is suitable for it. I went to the viewing of one of my coworkers who died in a car accident and was appalled when I realized (and realized too late to discreetly escape) that it was an open casket viewing. We’re talking wood putty. It was just horrible; I had nightmares for months. It was not the way that I wanted to remember that person at all. I know that the undertakers try very hard to make the body look as good as they can but there is only so much that they can do.
22. aplspud - November 8th, 2007 at 9:54 pm
I’ve seen dead bodies (my grandmother, my mother, pets) but I’ve only been to one open casket funeral. I didn’t know the woman (very elderly grandmother of a friend) and I was thoroughly creeped out by everyone standing around talking with this dead body sitting there. Maybe its my Jewish upbringing (funeral within 1-2 days, no embalming, no open casket) or the fact that my mother was cremated. But then funerals are for the living, so if it makes the family feel better, to each his own. This was interesting to read though.
23. erin - November 8th, 2007 at 10:36 pm
this just reinforced my decision to get cremated. i do not want people shoving cotton in my ass or in my vag. let me rest in peace.
24. jfrater - November 8th, 2007 at 11:43 pm
Mathilda: very well said (and even funny in a bizarre way!) - I am not keen on the idea of open casket funerals.
25. Drogo - November 8th, 2007 at 11:58 pm
Because of scheduling, my grandfather’s viewing was delayed, by the final viewing some decomposition was appearing. He was starting to look a little gruesome. (grayish skin, distortion.)
I didn’t get a good look at my grandmother because on the same day she died I had an accident with ammonia that splashed and burned my eyes. I have this slight feeling that I didn’t get to fully say “Good Bye” because my vision was blurry and I didn’t get a good look at her in the casket. (My vision cleared up 2 weeks after she was buried.) In the case of my cousin who was killed and mangled in a car accident. The mortician had to convince his mom to have a closed casket because he wasn’t able to reconstruct or undo the damage done to Gary’s face. (Yuck) I think I want to be cremated.
26. Brian Moo - November 9th, 2007 at 12:09 am
As much as I feel that the way my grandfather looked in his open casket was just out of character for him (He was a very lively fellow with a smile, and in the casket he was well, very dead -even for a dead man- and looked as if they sucked everything out of him and gave him a pseudo-expression on his face), it was the only real time to say farewell to him besides the burial.
That alone, warrants my embalming when I die. Maybe after they all say farewell then I can get cremated myself!
27. Drogo - November 9th, 2007 at 12:28 am
I can say the same thing about my grandfather (that Brian Moo just said about his). Also, They tried to recomb his hair because my grandma fussed about how “His hair isn’t right!”
28. grammagirl - November 9th, 2007 at 1:28 pm
my grandmother passed away a few months ago. i was extremely close to her. she was always a well kept woman. even battling cancer, every hair had to be in place, and makeup done daily! she knew she was about to pass, and told me that she wanted me to do her hair and makeup. i kept to those wishes. it was so surreal to walk into the room and see her on the metal table. she was completely nude, so i had to request a sheet to cover her. he was extremely respectful, other than him allowing me to see her nude. he prepared the hair tools, and all of the makeup. he even plugged in the tools for me. doesn’t sound like much, but in the moment, it meant the world to me. i never took the time to say thank you, as i’m sure others don’t either. it’s def. not a career you go into for the glory, but it’s also so overlooked.
29. jfrater - November 9th, 2007 at 1:34 pm
grammagirl: I am sure that he would have known you were thankful - he is used to dealing with people under those difficult circumstances. And what a great thing you did for your Grandmother - I don’t think I have the courage to do that. Good on you.
30. Hannah - November 11th, 2007 at 5:47 pm
Wow! I’m so thankful I live in a country that is super “clinical” if you will, about dead bodies. I’m definitely not a fan of open casket funerals, but I would take them any day over some cultures where the body is laid out in the house for days on end with large family meals and gatherings going on around them (Russia comes to mind…).
31. Kathryn - November 26th, 2007 at 1:01 am
Well, I thought this was amazing… because I am a 2nd year student to be an embalmer in Montreal, Canada… and this article is really pretty accurate! it’s a 3 year course, that only accepts 40 ppl a year. It’s HARD… and only in french (Vive le Quebec!). Only 10-20 of those 40 students will graduate. I mean, the actual embalming isn’t the most dificult thing in the world… what’s hard? The law course… all the different biology courses we do… the chemistry, physics, reconstruction, pathology, microbiology… it goes on!! Law’s the hardest. And to answer your questions about why we thow out shaving tools? Well… according to our biomedical laws (which are different everywhere) anything that is a non anatomic biomedical waste (anything that has been in contact with bodily fluid), has to be incinerated, if it can not not be disinfected. So, while the home COULD use reusable razors, which have to be thrown out anyways and rust over time, it’s better to make it biomedical, and have it picked up by the local hospital, who treat that stuff like they do to the hospitals own biomedical waste (incineration)
A lot of places don`t offer this program, and becoming an embalmer is often like taking a trade… just go into apprentice. But having a real 3 year college course teaches us EVERYTHING we`ll ever need to know, to work in any aspect of the “death industry”… not just embalming. And usually, they are nice people… I mean, you wouldn`t know it`s what I do by seeing me on the bus… Im a normal 19 year old girl.
Anyways, the whole point of open casket funerals is to give the family a chance to say goodbye (thank you, psychology course!)… so we embalm to stop the spreading of diseases.
And Grammagirl, that does take a lot of courage. It is incredibly frightening to witness something so “taboo” in our society… especially while you were mourning. The only thing wrong with that situation is that her privates, at least, should have DEFINITLY been covered. We are taught that for 2 reasons:
1. Not only embalmers work in the lab… a funeral director or a janitor might be walking by, and be really curious, so they peek. It’s not their place to see this, and it’s our job to ensure that.
and
2. Maybe in life, this person was embarrassed/shy/whatever, and it is not up to us to expose them, and go against their wishes. We believe people would rather know that they’re going to be respected.
32. Smartlydone - December 8th, 2007 at 10:05 am
I absolutely could never be a mortician. I don’t go to funerals anymore, been to three, can’t stand them. “They” aren’t there, anyway, and there are other ways to show respect to the family. BTW, I will be cremated, can’t bear the thought of someone massaging my dead muscles and sewing closed my jaw. Yeah, I know, I won’t be there to experience it. But still. Ye ghods. As for the prep of the body, had a friend who was murdered, stabbed in the throat so many times her head was almost off. They had to cover her sewn up wounds with crepe-like paper that matched her dress color. Really drew attention to what happened. And everyone said, doesn’t she look peaceful, look pretty. NO. SHE DIDN’T. BLEH.
33. Becca - December 28th, 2007 at 7:46 pm
Wow, thanks for posting this. I plan on becoming a mortician so this is actually useful for me:)
34. Aggie - December 31st, 2007 at 4:49 pm
I had the fortunate experiance(or unfortunate for some) to be buddies with a college professor who taught crime scene investigation. Whenever he had a class trip to the morgue he always brought me along.
I will tell you this, I have seen the before and afters of some corpses and these men and women do some damn fine jobs. Yes the wood putty is a bit creepy to look at but what the person looked like before was horrible(they had a fleshing eating disease, ’nuff said)
Great list though!
35. ryan - January 11th, 2008 at 7:41 pm
I cant believe that they actually sew the mouth shut i always wanted to be buried but now after reading this, i am not so sure about this and i do not want people that i do not know doing stuff to by butt. I really do not want my insides to be at the bottom of the casscete.what if my friends and family wanted to see all of me, and they did not know about it, and then they see that? what would the family say? I would feel stupid saying all of that.
My cousin was thinking about becoming a hair person for the dead, and if that was me i really would think about getting a new career. the #1 thinkg that i really do not want to happen is that they stick the needle thing in through my jaw and up to my nose, then go back down. to me that is just gross!!!!
Yeah, i understand that they are trying to make you look good, but that is just the weirdest thing. Another thing, i like massages when i am living, but not when i am dead, not that i have ever had a massage when i am dead, but i would like to enjoy it.
My grandpa died 2 years ago and if i would have know this then i would look at it all differently. i would have been a little nosym and looked at the bottom of his chin, yeah that would be alittle weird, but i would be curious.
thanks for all of the info.
36. kelly - January 28th, 2008 at 12:54 pm
Great info- loved the humorous tone. I am trying to do research for a novel and need some of the more technical, nitty gritty, gruesome details involved in restoration. so far you have given me the most- but I want more! Where did you get most of your info?
37. jfrater - January 28th, 2008 at 1:06 pm
kelly: google
38. bobismygoldfish - February 2nd, 2008 at 4:32 pm
Long time reader first time poster haha. I am in school to become a Funeral Director/Embalmer. This list is put together so well! Oh, and just to put one thing to rest, Funeral Directing and Embalming aren’t morbid jobs for morbid people. It is a a very professional and science based profession. It is grounds for termination if you curse in front of a body and somebody finds out.
39. Corella - February 20th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
Im studying autopsy right now, and amazingly this list is accurate
40. KAY - March 8th, 2008 at 1:57 pm
i may b a bit odd but i wud lov 2 do wot u do its the last thing u can do 4 anyboby and as awful as it is its nessessary i mean no thy dont luk like thy did but imagine nt doing anythn 2 the body??? i hav lost lots ov family including my 16yr old sister and if this wasnt done we wudnt ov had the last 5 days b4 the funeral 2 say goodbye and c her.even now 7 yrs later i rememba her in har coffin……..awful yes bt am grateful 4 the chance 2 say gudbye.
41. Becky - March 16th, 2008 at 11:24 am
When I was in year 10 at school (that’s 4th year secondary school) I had my work experience in an undertakers. People said I was stupid and disgusting, but, I just think I had guts and have never had such a good time and great experience as that gave me.
I am now in my first year of college on a two year medical course, and after this will go onto university to do a course in funeral directing or pathology. I cant wait to qualify and give the dead the respect they want after there death.
I’m just a little unsure on how I will afford to qualify - I guess I will find that out when the time comes!!
42. kirstie - March 27th, 2008 at 1:31 am
this is the job i wanna do….i feel that ppl shud see there lost ones before they are buried,but see them how they looked before they passed away and not looking dead so to speak.
43. kelly - March 29th, 2008 at 10:47 am
hi i am really interested in embalming as an occupation but i am at a loss as to where to start is there anybody who can help me and tell me where to start looking for training i.e courses and stuff.I live in newcastle (england)thank you
44. toni-ann - April 5th, 2008 at 8:41 pm
My Mum got embalmed today.. I just looked up the site as I wanted to know what had been done to her…She looked beautiful in her coffin.. Like she was just sleeping..
45. Kip - April 6th, 2008 at 8:15 pm
I found everyones comments very interesting. I should have gone into this field. I missed my calling. As a seventh grader (a very long time ago) I took a test to see what I should do for a living. My test said I should go into the funeral business. I was shocked and never took that seriously. Now, I wished I had. I am 47 years old now, too late for me but, those of you that have the interest and the drive please don’t do what I did and pursue your passions. I’m sure I would have done very well if not for those friends and family members that thought I was morbid. This is something that is necessary and a highly respected proffesion. Good luck to those who follow through and to the girl that did your grandmas hair and make up, good for you not everyone can do that. I would have for my grandma she, like your grandma was a wonderful woman. I would have found the strength to go in there and get the job done. Tearfully perhaps but, done just the same.
46. Kathryn - April 13th, 2008 at 6:17 am
It’s too bad that some people are saying “it’s too gross being sewn shut” or “being massaged is weird”… but they have to understand that as a mortician, I don’t do it for fun… every step is crucial to having a great finished result. And all of it to benifit the family psychologically. The whole reason we embalm is so people can have the chance to say goodbye and see how beautiful they look, while staying healthy (the human body is a vessel for disease… we wanna make sure no one gets sick at the funeral!)
People don’t pass away like they do on tv… eyes remain open and so does the mouth. If we don’t close them, and sew them to keep them permanently closed… Imagine the reaction of the mourning family when the deceased starts blinking or opening his mouth.
We massage because when some one dies, their blood isn’t the same consistancy as it used to be, and there has been sweling… there’s clogs… and the fluid we inject has a dye in it, so the body takes on the natural colour. But if we don’t massage, not only does the body look skiff and unreal, but the body could end up having discolourations and not be preserved in places where the fluid didn’t reach. Honestly, as you massage, you see the colour change back to pink. It’s really an amazing thing.
Basically, people forget that we’re animals like any other… when we die, we’re not prettier then a dog would be when he dies… and the whole point of embalming is to stay pretty and CLEAN so the family can see them as they remember them… and can continue to remember. And Kelly… if you want more info, I’ll be glad to help.
47. Kathryn - April 13th, 2008 at 6:31 am
Also! I forgot! Ryan… I spoke kind of blatantly here, because I’m kinda just mentioning WHY we do it… but in reality, it’s incredibly respectful. Yes, it’s invasive… but we are taught by other professionals before anything else about respect for the body. And a good professional will never leave the family without guidance… so if I saw the family going to open the casket, not only would they already know about the box at the bottom, but I would assist them in viewing the open casket.
Some people find this information to be too much… and I can understand why… but nothing is worse then being informed halfway and being disturbed by it, without even really understanding it.
People are always going to have preferances… that’s why embalming is not the only option… but legally, to have an open casket, you HAVE to be embalmed. It may seem terrible to some… but it’s so much safer.
48. jfrater - April 13th, 2008 at 6:56 am
Kathryn: thanks very much for your comment - it is nice to hear from a person involved in the industry. I have removed your email address because it is likely to get picked up by spam bots. If people want to communicate with you more than can leave a message here and I can provide them with your address. Thanks again!
49. andy - April 13th, 2008 at 2:23 pm
what a job to do i dont think i could do this to my worse enemy lol
50. Kathryn - April 13th, 2008 at 9:06 pm
Thanks jfrater! I worried about it, but I figured… it’s all over the internet anyways lol. Do you work in the industry? Or are you just interested by it?
51. kinesic.bebo.com - April 14th, 2008 at 5:04 pm
Someone has to do it, and the best people to do the job will be those who is a caring person, willing to mourn with those that mourn, comfort those who stand ineed of comfort.
52. carolyn - April 16th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
went to visit elderly aunt who had been although badly emaciated from leukaemia, an animated person, with a ready smile and nicely kept dyed blond hair. She was 89, an had a tremedous spirit. I simply wanted to pop a poem in her coffin.
I was met with the most terrible grey, grotesque looking thing that frightened me to death. Shot out of funeral home in fright. Not the way i wanted to remember my husband’s auntie
53. Kathryn - April 17th, 2008 at 12:29 am
Aww that is so sad Carolyn! Some one there should have warned you… but you should also ask for assistance!
The reason your aunt was less than presentable, was because she had not been embalmed… the law says that only open caskets require it, and if the casket was closed, then she had not been treated. I’m really sorry that you had to see her like that… but don’t remember her for it. If she was a lively woman with a fantastic smile… then please remember that.
It was no one’s fault that that happend, but don’t let her legacy be only for one moment of uneasiness! And PLEASE… next time, ask for help… not only so you can get the best service and memories, but so your outlook itself can stay untarnished… that’s rly important!
Also… if it bothered you terribly… don’t hesitate to visit that funeral home, because they are there to take care of you. Tell them what happend… they are trained to let you know and explain so that you can have peace of mind.
Good luck to you!
54. Elliot - April 20th, 2008 at 11:54 am
I am in school now working on my Master’s degree in Professional Counseling with a desire to be a bereavement therapist. I work part-time at the Central Care Center in Atlanta, GA. It is a large funeral home that does a lot of prep work for the local area’s funeral homes. I LOVE MY JOB! I read this write-up, and I was extremely impressed with the detail and accuracy of the info. Great job to the author, and good luck to anyone aspiring to be a Funeral Director/Embalmer. It’s a fabulous profession, and I support anyone with the passion or “calling.” -Elliot of Atlanta, GA.
55. kinesic.bebo.com - April 23rd, 2008 at 6:22 pm
Phewwwww what a day%-)
56. abel - May 6th, 2008 at 6:21 pm
nice. but i was expecting more ‘morbid’ pics.
too conservative i guess…
57. buddys_girl - May 13th, 2008 at 8:20 am
My boyfriend does this for a living. I never realized how much work it was. He told me each boy takes 2 1/2 to 4 hrs and I never understood why. Now I see and will stop complaining about the late nights at work..
58. marie - May 18th, 2008 at 5:18 am
My mum was embalmed after she died last year. We saw her and she did not look like my mum although I know the funeral directors had done their best. What upset me most was that by day 3 of mum being at the funeral directors they rang us to say that mum’s body had “deteriorated” and they did not advise any more open coffin viewings. I had wanted to see my mum again to put some personal items in her coffin. My grandad who lives away did not get the chance to see his daughter and was understandably upset by this. I have always wondered what happened to my mum in that within 3 days she had got so bad that we couldnt see her again. Are the bodies not kept refridgerated to prevent rapid deterioration?
59. Mutt - May 21st, 2008 at 7:39 am
Marie, embalming does not cease decomposition, it can only slow it down for a time. Dependent upon the initial condition of the body, time invested and skill of the embalmer will determine the time frame.
If a body ends up getting what is known in the trade as “Tissue Gas” which is an off gas due to the blooming of a certian types of bacteria, the body will repidly decompose. The body will look like a road map with decomposition of the remaining blood in the body. The bacterias wastes are gaseous and stink like nothing pleasant. Once the gasses reach the surface of the body the tissues will look and feel like bubble wrap as the travel in the interstitial spaces.
Not a pleasant sight. It is pretty much impossible to stop this action after cavity embalming has take place due to damage to the circulatory system during the process.
Once a body is in a casket, it is not wise to refrigerate the casket and body because, once removed from the chill air, there will be condensation problems. Remove a nice cold bottle of beer from the fridge, you get droplets of water on the bottle forming. Its nice with beer, but not on your loved one.
Hope that helps.
60. Pam - June 7th, 2008 at 5:38 pm
I was just wondering about what all is involved with embalming. My Dad died, I had to go and say if he was fixed right. I did go, I loved my Dad, and he looked perfect, just like he could open his eyes and wake up. But I got in trouble with the Embalmer because i was heart broken. My Dad was gone, so I was rubbing his hair & the Embalmer came out & jumoed all over me. I wasn’y trying to mess him up, I was just loving him a goodbye.Thanks, Pam
61. steve currie - June 15th, 2008 at 5:54 pm
hi very interesting site am interested in doing embalming course i live in liverpool england what i want to know is would anyone let me know if there r any distance learning courses and if so would it be possible to do this as i dont work in funeral industry
62. richuk - June 19th, 2008 at 11:17 pm
how amazing this is, unfortunatly it is something that will happen to all of us. i think people should know what happens to them after death…
63. tea - June 22nd, 2008 at 1:52 pm
when my darling son died last year, i also was told after 4 days that i couldnt visit him due to ‘nature taking its course’ i though that fact that he was embalmed would stop that, thank you this answers my quetions.
also why wouldnt the funeral home place his hands on his chest as i requested?, i wanted to see his hands for the last time, & i wasnt allowed too, WHY?.. why would they hide them from me..
64. Elliot - June 22nd, 2008 at 3:55 pm
Since I have been working at a funeral home, I have learned a lot about embalming and the final “memory picture.” There could have been a number of reasons why the funeral directors did not want you to see your son’s hands. It could have something to do with the way he died.
65. tea - June 23rd, 2008 at 12:03 pm
thank you, he died of Asphyxia, i believe his hands were clenched, why couldnt they massage them after death? i needed to hold them for 1 last time…..
66. Elliot - June 23rd, 2008 at 12:50 pm
I am not a physician, but here is my guess. Sometimes if embalming is not done soon enough, the hands may “lock” in place. Although it is true that massaging can loosen the rigor mortis, sometimes the muscles just lock in a particular way. For a complete answer, you may want to ask the embalmer. What was that like for you to not be able to hold his hand(s)? Did this halt your greiving process any?
67. tea - June 23rd, 2008 at 2:04 pm
that must have been the case as we had to wait 2 weeks for funeral, yes it is on my mind all the time, im a mum i should have been there to hold his hands at all times, & even though he was gone i just wanted to see them & touch them, but i was scared to look to close into the casket, i did ask the funeral director to move them, but they didnt, & its still on my mind constantly.
also the fact that he was shy & people saw him…. plus was his organs placed back inside him?….. was that why i thought his chest was a funny shape?
i was in shock at the time & these questions didnt come into my mind untill months after.
68. Elliot - June 23rd, 2008 at 2:57 pm
Once again, I am not a licensed funeral director or embalmer, but I do work at the funeral home and have gained lots of 1st hand knowledge. If he was autopsied, then the organs were placed back inside him. The organs placed back inside him would not have caused the funny shape. That, perhaps, was due to possibly the fact that the funeral (and possibly the prepwork) was delayed. Also, tissues can, and do, do wierd things once the blood is no longer circulating through the body. This could also be what the funeral director refered to you as “nature taking its course.”
69. tea - June 24th, 2008 at 12:37 pm
Thanks again, that settles my mind that he is ‘all in one place’
his autopsie was 24-36 hrs after death, he was then taken to the funerals home main office, some miles away the next day, & i had to wait a week for him to come back, so it proberly was delayed.
can i ask approx how long does a body stay in the same state after embalming? someone told mw 12yrs thats why i came on this site for answers.
70. kinesic - June 24th, 2008 at 2:33 pm
Hey Tea:) A human body can be preserved a life time.
71. Mutt - June 28th, 2008 at 7:02 pm
Ok, lets I’m going to answer some questions and correct some false information. I am a Funeral Director / Embalmer and very active in the trade.
1) A body continues to change over time with natural action of bacteria, embalming does not stop this action, only slows it for a period of time.
2) Yes, a form of mumification can still be done but it is a great waste of fluid (Fluid = $)in the preproom. The process would call for a gradually ramping up the HCHO(formaldhyde) percentage in the arterial injection starting with ~1.25% HCHO, the normal level used for normal cases. Once proper distribution of fluid is noted in the tissues the percentage of HCHO can be brought up slowly in steps to somehwhere around 5 percent. While injecting, the body should be massaged so that the tissues can be flushed of blood and interstitial fluids. While doing this you need to pay attention to the softer tissue areas (eyes, lips, neck) to make sure you do not cause distention (swelling). The dyes used in some arterial fluids may also compound and cause some weird coloration of surface tissue (such as neon pink grannies).
The slower rate of flow into the tissues the better absorption will be. The reason for starting the process with a low HCHO% is to allow for deeper penetration of fluids before the HCHO fixes the proteins in the cells. Starting off with a high % would only lead to what is called shell embalming, basically just searing/fixing the tissues closest to the vessels leaving the rest untreated.
The embalmer must also do a very good job of cavity embalming in order to allow the cavity fluid to penetrate the organ tissues which are generally not very well vascularized.
Once the embalming is done and you have not caused distention, or over saturation of the tissues the body will now be fairly stiff and not the most fun to apply cosmetics to as the face will be not very co-operative and not very pliable. Dressing an “over-embalmed” case is not fun as the limbs will not be easy to move. I hope you had them in the proper position before you arterially injected or you will have some problems positioning them once in the casket.
You should now have on the table a chemically dehydrated body suitable for standing up in the corner of a room for a signifcant length of time.
As to the hidden hands, it may have been a case of the fingers darkening due to post mortem staining caused by blood breaking down into the tissues. Or perhaps caused by dehydration / decomposition blackening of the tips. On some cases natural nail polish and lots of skill at restoration work and cosmetics could work, but it is a case by case thing.
72. Vera Lynn - June 28th, 2008 at 7:57 pm
I have been to several open casket funerals. Some of them had really bad make-up and it made me sadder. No dignity. I want all they can take from me, and cremate the rest. Death is always too hard. And I have also seen the wax and wood glue fillers. Even worse.
73. ellie33 - July 2nd, 2008 at 6:33 am
I have found all this fascinating. I live in the United Kingdom. My father died in April this year. He was cremated but he was still attended to at the funeral directors so that my mother and I could go and see him to say our last goodbyes. It was obvious to me that they had done something to his mouth as the shape of it was not as it had been when he was alive, and although he was obviously dead and not ‘asleep’ after watching him die it was a comfort to see him at peace and no longer suffering. My mother was just concerned that he felt so very cold and wanted to cover him to warm him. She was very distraught at the time so I just told her that his warmth which was his heart and soul was no longer there and that is why the shell was cold. The viewing room at the funeral directors was icy cold with air con blowing but I guess this was to keep the body cool and to prevent the condensaton effect. Our funeral directors were marvellous and I will be forever grateful that they looked after my dad so well.
74. tea - July 2nd, 2008 at 12:59 pm
I felt the same as your mother, when i saw my son in the mortuary & the funeral home, i wanted to hug him to give him my body heat, the coldness of his body was such a shock…..
but i did need to see him & sat with him in the funeral home for some time on 2 days, just ’saying goodbye’ & stroking his hair…….
75. moi - July 3rd, 2008 at 2:27 am
for the person who was number 6, Im a Funeral Director/Embalmer, firstly stay cream is not a glue. secondly as comment number 7 said its not a few days that someone remembers seeing there loved one for,its forever. my ambition in life was to be what I am because I can still see what my father looked like in his casket 22 years ago, I never wanted any little girl to see there daddy like that. The feeling when a family member is so grateful & thankful for how they look that last time they will c them is unbelievable, i could work for hours to make sure that everything is perfect,there is nothing morbid about funeral directors/embalmers infact anything but.
76. Christopher Davis - July 19th, 2008 at 5:21 am
I would be more than glad to answer any questions that may relate to this process. I have recently finished school and aquired my degree in this field. Feel free to e-mail me with any questions that pertain to this topic. I will be more than pleased to get back in touch with anyone interested! Remember everyone its a servce that we will always be in dyre need of, and it is not as bad in person as one would think!
77. lily - July 19th, 2008 at 3:43 pm
really interesting. i viewed a body recently and wondered about the whole process of embalming. I would find it such a privilege to make someone’s last memories of their loved one the best it could possibly be.
78. karen - July 22nd, 2008 at 7:57 pm
i was with my father when he died along with my mum brother and four sisters,allthe spouses were present along with nine grang children, ten great grand children the hospital commented that it was like old trafford but very lovley. affter we went to say goodbye once again and dad looked terrible mouth open and sunken even after half an hour after he had died
on seeing him a few days later for four consecutive days he looked pain free and quite th gentle man all of us visited and chatted has if he was still with us ,the embalmers did a wonderfull job he looked regal and peacful and i thank you all for that it was a lovely experience for the family to be together and say goodbye, however i dont know how the funeral directers closed the coffin because we put so much family stuff and fun things in with dad but i and my family got so much comfort from that. however my best friend died of breast cancer having faught it for three years and she did not look that great when she was laid out in her coffin. so i do believe it does depend on how you die and what of has how you look afterwards.is this true or not? i believe so.
79. mandy - July 23rd, 2008 at 10:05 am
eva since i left skool ive always been interested in death (no im not a freak) & i wanted 2 be an embalmist but was always put off coz i aint very brainy, so i went in2 care work were u do ave 2 deal wif dead people which didnt bother me, now im 43 & i still want 2 b an embalmist , is it possilbe 4 u 2 let me know wot i ave 2 do 2 fullfil my dream job. fanx
80. Tallus - July 23rd, 2008 at 5:39 pm
Well, most funeral services courses will accept older students.
The plus side of attending one hosted through a college or university it they offer additional courses such as English.
81. kate - July 25th, 2008 at 1:26 am
I have just lost a close relative, in susicious circumstanstances. They died at home,no post-portham or coroner inquiry. I was informed that the body was embalmed, however when arriving in Rep of Ireland, the body has cotton wool pushed up the nostrils and ears, the body was laid out for 2 days in the house, and was clearly decomposing. I was informed that the embalming didnt work, by the inlaws of the deceased, they claimed this was due to medication for diabetes the deseaced was taken, all jewelery was still on their wedding finger. It this possible that an Embalmed body can decompose, when it had been embalmbed within hours of the death? Please can anyone help this could be vital to an inquiry into a young person’s death?
82. morbidmike - August 1st, 2008 at 7:10 pm
YEs Kate the body can still decompose. As stated in some of theother comments, embalming does not stop decomposition it just slows it down. There are numerous things that can affect the embalming process, and the medications that a person was taking or given at a hospital is certainly one of them
83. rushfan - August 2nd, 2008 at 7:28 pm
Cool list. I hope to never be embalmed, I’d like to be scavenged for any useful organs that can help someone that’s still alive. And the rest can go for scientific research.
84. Mutt - August 3rd, 2008 at 8:57 am
Most organ donations must be taken from a living donor.
There has been a great boom in organ donors thanks to the increase in motorcyclists that buy a motorbike that is far too powerful for themselves.
A great book to read about what happens to a body after it is donated to science is “Stiff” by Mary Roach. An excellent and often funny read.
85. rushfan - August 3rd, 2008 at 10:08 am
Mutt ~ I actually work for the Texas Transplant Institute.
We perform quite a few cadaveric transplants, just as we do live-donor. Bone marrow, obviously, live-donor, related and unrelated. Heart, cadaveric, obviously. Kidney, pancreas, and liver, both types quite frequently. (You can also donate tissue and parts after death.) It’s a fascinating field of medicine. I love hearing talks given by our world-renowned docs. And Thursday mornings I get to go to a BMT tracking meeting and hear about the status of our adult and pedi bone marrow patients. It inspired me to sign up to be typed to be a bone marrow donor. I hope I will be a match for someone in need, there are lots of people who don’t have family matches, so they go to the national registry to search. I highly recommend everyone sign up to donate bone marrow.
86. curious - August 5th, 2008 at 4:12 pm
I have understood all of the comments on here as i have read through them tonight, my gran was embalmed and in an open casket in her own home with all of her family around her never was she on her own at any minute in any day before the funeral, it took me 3 trips to church and a couple of drinks for dutch courage to go into her room and see her but once i had it was perfect, she had all her family around her even grand children and great grand children, they now have no fear as i once did and unless you have experienced it you wont know i was the worst critic and most terrified but its amazing how it calms you before they leave for good xxxxxxx
87. Denzell - August 8th, 2008 at 6:24 am
No way would I do that for a living. I’d rather pose for a nude male magazine.
88. toxickiss - August 12th, 2008 at 1:32 pm
Well I would love to be an embalmer seen a few dead people some in open caskets some in the morgue.
Couldnt read all the comments tonight but what I did read was great.
Deffo gettin embalmed when I go.
89. We are Oceans - August 15th, 2008 at 4:27 pm
I really would like to get into the field of embalming, im 17, 18 in october and am very interested but im unsure about alot of things, the comments ive read here have helped so much but i still have a few question:
1. How do i get morgue jobs, as like a tour of what il be
doing
because ive never seen a corpse (seen pictures)and it
might not be something i could get used to
2. Can you do such other things like Pathology ect with the
skills you get from learning to embalm (i read a comment
and saw pathology and i am also very intestered in that
but you have to be a doctor which is many years in
trainning)
3. What other sorts of jobs are there to do with help the
those who have past into the after life? for example,
hospital work, police work ect.
Thank you for any information you give me in advance and thank you for the info ive already gotten from the past comments.
90. Mutt - August 16th, 2008 at 3:57 am
At your age, have you considered seeking part time work at a funeral home? Just about every funeral home has “FDA’s” or Funeral Director’s Assistants. This is a good way to get an idea if you like this line of work.
91. We are Oceans - August 16th, 2008 at 5:52 am
Thank you Mutt!, im trying hard at the moment to find a placement but none see to be willing.
92. jj - August 16th, 2008 at 9:36 am
Can a body be too detoriated to be embalmed? How long would someone have to be deceased to be to detoriated to be embalmed or frozen until a funeral can occur
93. Angie - August 27th, 2008 at 3:06 pm
Ive always for as long as i can remember would loved to have done this job, hwere would i start and who an where would i find out about it, should i contact my local college (Dunstable)
94. janii - August 27th, 2008 at 11:44 pm
i really want to have a career in that some day and find it really coolish in a way
i would really like to no how to get in to this line of work
95. clare - September 2nd, 2008 at 11:15 am
find it really intresting an wud love to do it where do i start loking
96. sallyanne - September 5th, 2008 at 1:07 pm
i lost my mum to cancer and it was a very diffacult time for all to be able to go see her and say good bye to see her peacfull and not in pain any more was realy nice i take my hat of to any one who can do that couse with out them there would be a lot of people with very sad memoreys i would love to be able to do that for others what better gift can you give to some one that is going through so much heart ache thanks to every one who dedicates their lives to do this great job.
97. sallyanne - September 5th, 2008 at 1:13 pm
What qualifacations do you need to do this tyip of job i am interested in finding out more about it any info would be great many thanks sallyanne.
98. Cedestra - September 5th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
You have to go to school for it, sallyanne. I’m not sure how many years: my guess would be 4, could be 6.
99. Cedestra - September 5th, 2008 at 1:26 pm
Oh, and you must be licensed and have a proper work area that passes inspection.
100. Mutt - September 5th, 2008 at 5:27 pm
Sallyanne depending upon where in the world you live, there are varying requirements.
Many countries require no formal education nor licencing such as Australia (although formal training does exist, often its on the job training). Others, such as the UK have professional associations that one must be a member of for this line of work. The USA and Canada have state or provincial licencing that varies with requirements from location to location. Some states require a post graduate degree, while others do not. Some provinces licencing, such as Ontario’s, are accepted as a direct exchage to other provinces or states with a ’suggestion’ to read the new location’s legislation pertaining to funeral services.
To write licencing exams in many locations, the local licence boards often stipulate where you take your Funeral / Mortuary Services formal training in addition to internships.
Your best bet is to fess up and tell us where you are from so we can direct you further to your local board or whatever is the norm where you live.
101. Tylerbanks - September 10th, 2008 at 3:10 pm
I am only 15 years old and i really want this to be my career.
102. babygirl - September 12th, 2008 at 1:30 pm
I came to look to see what goes on after people died. I lost my nanna who was only 73 years old, last week. The Funeral Parlour were so helpful and considerate and let the family know everything. I was very close to my nanna and told them exactly what she would have wanted and they done it. They have inspired me to get into this line of work, i just dont know how to go about it. Can anybody help me?
103. madmum - September 13th, 2008 at 7:34 am
My neice 26 is working voluntary in africa she is hoping to be a midwife, she has been helping out with all differnt situations in the hospitals and has just sent me an e-mail saying she has helped out with the embalming of a young gir, just wanted to say im so proud of her and to all of you that do such a wonderful caring job!
104. laura-jane - September 26th, 2008 at 3:48 pm
This is a great site, i want to do this for a living, i suppose some experience in the field is a must before anything.
105. DeeDee - October 4th, 2008 at 8:41 am
Hi babygirl
I work in the funeral industry and can tell you it is extremely rewarding. The best way to get into it is to approach the co-operative funeralcare business, as they are always looking for new recruits.Good Luck
106. JustJenny - October 5th, 2008 at 10:48 pm
My dad died a couple of weeks ago, it was a terrible time as we were not told about it, it was only after one of us visited and found him missing that we found out, the hospital or the police seemed to think that my dad was not important enough to tell anyone, i intend taking this further as it has been a horrible time for us, dad had to have a PM as his was an unexpected and in my opinion fairly early death as he was only 78, because we were not told of his death, we did not get to see him until he was in the morgue, and it was quite a shock for one my sisters as she wondered why his head had been stitched, i had not thought to warn her as i was still grieving like her. I came on to this site out of curiousity and hope that my dad was treated with more respect and dignity by the morgue and funeral parlour than the other authorities, after reading some of your comments i am almost certain that he was, dad had been dead for 4 days before we got to see him and so i realise that they must have worked hard as he did not look too bad at all, but we had to see him as we were in shock about the whole situation and needed to see him to truly accept he had died i suppose, i think it must be a very rewarding job tending the dead and helping their loved ones through the procedures, but maybe not one i could do,i am a carer and my job can be rewarding too, i dont believe this is a morbid job at all, it has to be done and death comes to us all, i hope i get the care we all deserve when i am leaving this world, and at 48 i echo what others have said, if you want to go into this field of career, dont mess around JUST DO IT!
Thanks for every ones comments including the light hearted ones!!! i feel better for reading them xx
107. tea - October 6th, 2008 at 11:32 am
Just Jenny
firstly please except my condolenences on your loss.. xxx
I know this isnt to do with embalming, but when my son died in July 07. the police did the same to myself & his sister, they visited my house at 8am, his friends told them my profession (not a millon miles different from theirs!) which mean they knew of my shifts etc and how easy it would have been to find me……. yet and they never contacted either of us for the whole day…. we both carried on working not knowing my darling son was in the mortury ALONE…. we found out by a telephone call to his sister some 12hrs after he had been found. and i found out by going to his house & finding flowers & cards on the doorstep…..
due to my proffession i took advice & took this further, but i can tell you now i had to fight & fight and all that happened was a couple of officers & a DC go an entry on their history records for 18mths….. beleive me i wanted them sacked…….
i would still advise you to carry on ask for the station commander and ask to see the ‘incident log’ it will be upsetting …. but you will be channeling your anger into a cause which might afect other families…. & thats what i wanted, i would never wish another mother to find cards & flowers on aloved ones doorstep.
good luck & take care xxxxx
108. steve from co/durham - October 7th, 2008 at 10:21 am
wow what a job to do a challenge every time ,
so why dont we here of jobs advertise anywhere
i would love to do this job beats driving for a
living anyday
109. steve from co/durham - October 7th, 2008 at 10:24 am
wow what a job to do a challenge every time ,
so why dont we here of jobs advertise anywhere
i would love to do this job beats driving for a
living anyday if any jobs going i would be well
intrested.
110. deedee - October 8th, 2008 at 1:43 pm
amazing & intriguing. My father died aged 71 after over 20 years of kidney failure. I was his right
Hand and organized everything. I did ask about the embalming procedure but no one would tell me. Everyone’s comments have been good to read and I feel my father was truly taken care of. He looked even younger in the casket. I was told that funeral directors charge for keeping the body, but this is untrue. The quicker they get them the better as i have just learned. Good job i didnt listen and got on with the arrangements. God bless you all!
111. karen - October 11th, 2008 at 11:14 am
I have just visited my deceased father in law with my husband,my son, the daughter and his widow. We visited the hospital morgue only 11 hours after death. He had sadly died in the night alone andthe family had not had the chance to say goodbye so went straight up to hospital to see him. The sight was unexpected and in my opinion gruesome and disturbing. I had visited my own deceased father at the funeral directors some years back and as per your comments he looked clean,calm and if anything better than he had done during his long battle with illness. My father in law in the hospital morgue couldn’t have looked more different. His head was right back, his mouth was wide open and looked sore with a little blood and my son said his tongue was back. He actually looked like he had died of fright. If it had been my father I doubt I would have had the strength to get through that viewing, I felt myself stand back in disbelief. So many thoughts are going through my mind now, why were we not warned of what the body would look like etc. His widows first words were I wish they had closed his mouth, bless him. He had died of pneumonia and had suffered from Alzheimers for many years so had died with an oxygen mask on. I’m just wondering if anybody of professional knowledge would know is it normal to look so bad in a hospital morgue? And is my mind just running away with itself in thinking that nobody could have seen to him when he died and just left him like that. My daughter in law as a carer in a home tells me that if a patient dies they are taught to put a pillow under the chin afier death to close the mouth, if this is the case I cant think they did that in hospital as is mouth was not only open, it was wide open. I would welcome any helpful advice as to why this happened as I would talk to the hospital to prevent further families suffering such shock at this terrible time. They will be returning to see him at the funeral directors so after reading all this I am hoping for much improvement!
112. angle eyes - October 17th, 2008 at 1:24 am
this is what i want to be able to do but i dont know how to go about it
113. Laura - October 24th, 2008 at 2:33 pm
Karen,
I can only speak for myself, but as a nurse in a hospital, we always try to get the mouth to shut by rolling a towel or placing a pillow under the chin. Unfortunately, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. I don’t know why. With the amount of time that passed between his death and your viewing, I would assume that the timing had something to do with the tongue and the mouth. Once the body is removed from our floor and taken to the morgue, we don’t see it again so we have no way of knowing if what we have done stays in place. My condolences on his passing.
114. karen - October 24th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
Laura
Thank you for your kind reassuring words.We have since visited the funeral directors and the improvement was vast. He looked of better colour and his mouth was closed. I advise anybody who has perhaps had a similar experience to be brave enough to view again at the funeral directors. We came away feeling he finally looked not only himself but at peace.
115. zombie_lover - October 26th, 2008 at 5:42 pm
this is what i want to do for a living. I love how a lot of people think im creepy for it, but to me, it seems normal . Weird i know, but some one has to do it. and it takes grace and understanding. To anyone who dates someone who wants to do this, dont be so freaked.,
116. embalmer - November 9th, 2008 at 3:53 pm
Hi every1. i am an embalmer in the UK and i have read with interest your comments. I find it funny that alot of you say you are going to be cremated so you do not have an open casket etc. Here in the UK we embalm bodies for either burial or cremation, do you not do that where you are?? embalming is for the living and it is designed to preserve the corpse betwwen the time of death and disposal of the body, whether buried or cremated. people having loved ones cremated still have the right to view that person in the best possible condition.
Also embalming is not law and we sometimes have people who do not get embalmed, we still dress them, do their hair and close the mouth (yes we stitch all mouths shut) non embalmed cases still recieve the same dignity of those that are embalmed and i would not dream of sending some1 to their funeral (burial or cremation) with un tidy hair and a open mouth!!
117. scotsf - November 17th, 2008 at 5:13 pm
i sat with my dad for 10 days and nights watching him slowly pass away, he died 3 weeks ago it was a sunday and it wasnt till the wed that i got to see him at the funeral home, and by god did he look great, so peaceful and so like him before he became ill, i couldnt stop touching him it was amazing, i was so grateful how they made him look.i miss him everyday and i would love to get into embalming to help families see there loved ones the way i saw my dad
any1 who has any info on how to go about it would be great
118. embalmer - November 18th, 2008 at 11:25 am
Hi Scotsf, i am sorry to hear about your loss but am happy for you that you found comfort when you went to see dad.a good embalmer is the differenance between and happy last memory or an awful one. i do not think that you should go into embalming just yet. everything is still very raw for you and you might find the whole thing to much. i went into embalming about 8 years ago, my nan had died two years previous to that and i was devestated. i got into it and every person i am intrusted to care for, i look after the way i hope my nan got looked after.
119. scotsf - November 18th, 2008 at 3:55 pm
hi embalmer, thank you for ur kind words, its not because i saw my dad i want to do this kind of job, im a carer ive seen alot death over the last 12yrs of my job, since i was in high school i wanted to work in a morgue but didnt get the qualifactions i needed, i hav always been facinated with death (bit strange i know)
120. embalmer - November 19th, 2008 at 4:46 pm
Scotsf,
please take my advice, do not do it just yet, revise in 6 months. caring for the living is a gr8 job so concentrate on them. can you go to night school to get qualifications needed??? this would give you time for your grief and by the time your all qualified your be ready to come into my world! yes death is such an interesting thing, i cant say i was really into it b4 but doing this job certainly throws a light on how precious and delicate life is.
121. Sherri - November 21st, 2008 at 12:27 pm
I just recently (nov 3rd, ‘08)sent my official transcript to the Dallas Institute of Funeral Servive. I will be starting in may ‘09 at a cost of $1000 per month books included and going from 7:30am to 12:30pm mon-fri. Is there a less expensive Mortuary school around DFW? I live in Arlington TX, 20 min. from downtown Ft. Worth and Dallas. I actually get to skip the 1st quarter of classes due to my previously earned credits. Sooooooo, anybody have an idea of a school nearby me that is less costly? P.s. My degree would only be an Associates and I would start May ‘09 and gradutae May 2010. Also, I wonder if Funeral Directing and embaling is offered as a Bachelors, I am about 4 classes away from an Associates in Arts allready, ie: 2 yr degree in nothing…
122. Kristen - November 24th, 2008 at 9:09 pm
Still interested in doing this even after reading it.
That’s what I’m going to Lindenwood University for.
123. Tina - November 30th, 2008 at 5:57 pm
Hello, I was just wondering, for those who work in this field, what kind of facial expressions are most common on the recently deceased? This may be a morbid question, but I and interested in knowing this imformation. If you can’t answer this, please tell me where I can get the answer.
Thanks.
124. bs - December 12th, 2008 at 1:50 pm
These are very disterbing images, oh boy
125. Pork Chop - December 12th, 2008 at 1:51 pm
126. Hayley - December 21st, 2008 at 11:38 pm
Hello. I was wondering 2 things. Firstly what is this wood putty everyones been mentioning?
Also when a woman who would always be made up dies is her makeup replicated on her?
127. Adam C. Sieracki - December 29th, 2008 at 2:01 pm
I’ve only seen two embalmed people: my grandfather and an elderly, female friend of the family. My grandfather had diabetes and congestive heart failiure (he was just shy of 85). In both cases, the embalming/prep work was very nice. My grandfather probably looked worse in the last few weeks of his life–I remember it being very difficult to shave his face, since his skin had a spongy, frail quality (diabetes complications?). The only unusual thing was a touch of edema about the neck and ears. I noticed a pleasant odour, too, somewhat like carnauba wax (the makeup?). The experience of seeing my grandfather in this condition was good for my family, as he did not look well during his last year. We had him buried in a wooden (Batesville, I think) casket, in a concrete vault.
I’m curious about what happens when one dies overseas, as in war. I see the troops coming home in the Ziglers…are they embalmed before being brought here? Otherwise, i’d suspect they’d deteriorate terribly in transit.
there was a documentary on TV, about the Air India bombing, where Babar Khalsa terrorists killed a planeload of people over the ocean. One of the decedents was presented for identification to the family and his skin was a florid green; this was probably because he was in the seawater. I can only imagine the odour. It’s truly a good thing that embalmers can spare families this experience. There are many medical procedures performed on the living that are far more invasive than embalming. Funeral homes and graveyards seem to be more peaceful places than hospitals, with their ambience of fear, worry and pain.
Adam
128. Josh - December 29th, 2008 at 5:43 pm
i want to become an embalmer becuase it is facinating what they do to the human body!