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Weird Stuff

10 Weird and Fascinating Cat Tales

mjdolorico . . . Comments

The animal world is always full of interesting and bizarre stories. Cats are no exception. There are stories of cats crossing state borders to find their owners, cat survival tales and claims of talking cats. Today, I will list ten weird and fascinating tales I have heard/read/watched recently that has something to do with our feline friends.

10

The Litter Kwitter

WARNING: The clip above shows a cat using the toilet. Cleaning kitty litter is no walk in the park. According to statistics, it represents half of the expenses of keeping a cat. An interesting solution would be to train your cat to use the toilet. But how do you train your cat to do this? Enter the Litter Kwitter, a cat-friendly training system that teaches cats how to use a human toilet. The system consists of a special universal toilet seat (meaning it fits all toilets) and three toilet rings. The training is done in three stages. The first is the red stage, where your cat is trained to associate the toilet with the litter box using a red ring fitted above the toilet, filled with kitty litter. The amber stage follows, where your cat is trained to balance him/herself on the toilet seat while using it, using this time an amber ring with a small hole, surrounded with a little kitty litter. The final stage is the green stage, where your cat learns to use the toilet by balancing him/herself on the green ring, which has a larger hole this time. Voila! A potty-trained cat! For more information about this, uh, fantastic product, go here.

9

Radio Station for Felines

Screen Shot 2010-04-26 At 3.58.23 Pm

Nohl Rosen of Scottsdale, Arizona, is the proud owner of Cat Galaxy, an Internet radio and TV station catered specially for cats (and their owners too). Running for a strong nine years, the station has radio shows like Morning Meows, Meow Mixing Monday and Friday Night Feline Frenzy. Most of the music from this station is ‘feline-approved’, ranging from Jazz to R’n’B .Plus, the station features interviews with various veterinarians and pet-owners as well. Oh, and the station’s manager is none other than Rosen’s own pet cat, Isis. Even the assistant manager and the program director are cats. For more info, go here.


8

Brumas, the pink cat

 40765254 Pink Cat I 203

Brumas, a 9-yr. old cat from Devon, England, was taking her usual stroll on Sept. 3, 2005, but when he returned later, his owners were surprised to see their pet’s usual snow-white coat has turned a bright pink. “He was pink – Barbie pink. His head, ears and right down his body, although not underneath, had gone a quite brilliant pink,” said Joan Worth, the cat’s owner. Worried, Joan and her husband Philip immediately went to the vet to examine Brumas. The vet said that Brumas is in good health, but they couldn’t find an explanation for the cat’s strange color. “They couldn’t find any reason for it, although they decided it wasn’t toxic, which was what I was worried about,” said Mrs. Worth. Mr Worth added, “We have thought about everything as to how this happened, from him being covered in some form of cow treatment to children’s poster paints. We have no clue where he was that could have caused this to happen.” However, paint is not believed to be the reason because Brumas’ fur was not matted. As for Brumas, he seemed to be unaffected by the color change.

7

The Meow Mix House

061306Cat1

Meow Mix, a popular cat food brand, launched the Meow Mix House, a reality TV series that followed a ‘Survivor’ format. Ten cats chosen from various animal shelters across the country were pitted against each other in a battle of wits, brawn and brain in a luxurious mansion on Madison Avenue in New York City. What’s the first prize? A job as the feline Vice president of Research and Development in the Meow Mix Company. The reality series were shown on Animal Planet for ten straight weeks beginning June 16, 2006. Aside from the top prize, a second position in the company was awarded to the cat voted most popular by the viewers. The losers, however, gets a year’s supply of cat food, plus a new home and family, just like the two top winners. Oh, the top prize was given to Cisco from Miami, while Ellis from Portland won the popular vote


6

Project Acoustic Kitty

Acoustic1

Acoustic Kitty was a CIA project initiated by the Directorate of Science & Technology in the 1960’s. It attempted to use cats in spy missions, particularly to bug secret conversations. It involved inserting a microphone and transmitter with battery to the body of the cat, and wiring an antenna to its tail. The expenses used for the surgery and training were said to amount to 20 million dollars. However, when the project went on a trial run (a trial mission where the cat was assigned to listen on two men in a park in Washington, D.C.), the project came to a halt when the test cat was ran over by a taxi and killed. Due to the incident, not mentioning the various cons of the project, Acoustic Kitty was declared a failure.

5

Glow-in-the-dark cats

8734-Cloned Cats Glow Dark Agree Kind Experiment Improve Human Life Way

In 2007, scientists at Gyeongsang National University in South Korea have successfully created cloned cats that glow in the dark. The three white Turkish Angora cats, weighing around 7 pounds each, were capable of glowing red under UV light. Here is a quotation from a report written by Alan Boyle, the science editor at msnbc.com explaining the procedure: ‘They took skin cells from Turkish Angora female cats and used a virus to insert the genetic instructions for making red fluorescent protein. Then they put the gene-altered nuclei into eggs for cloning. The cloned embryos were implanted back into the donor cats, which effectively became the surrogate mothers for their own clones. Four kittens were born by Caesarian section, but one of them died during the procedure, according to the Korea Times. The fact that the kittens’ skin cells glowed under ultraviolet light served as evidence that they were really gene-altered clones.’


4

Feline Cutaneous Asthenia

Winged Cat

Feline Cutaneous Asthenia (FCA)is a rare hereditary disease found in cats. The disorder (which is like a feline equivalent to the human disease Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome) affects the way an afflicted cat’s body produces collagen, an important component in skin tissue and tendons. The disorder has two forms: one caused by a dominant gene and another one caused by a recessive gene. Both produce similar symptoms: abnormally soft and velvety skin that can easily tear. One common result of this is the formation of wing-like folds or flaps on a cat’s shoulders or back. FCA is said to be the cause of ‘winged’ cats, like a cat owned by Granny Feng of Xianyang City, China, who has 4-inch long wing-like appendages sprouting in its back. For more information about FCA, go here.

3

The Moscow Cats Theater

Yuri Kuklachev, a former member of the Moscow State Circus, is the founder of the Moscow Cats Theater, a performing troupe that has 120 feline members. The idea for the troupe came to Kuklachev in 1971, when he saw a stray cat that begs for food by standing on her hind legs. Realizing the potential of the cat, he adopted it and soon incorporated it in his act at the State Circus. 17 years later Kuklachev left the State Circus and started the Moscow Cats Theater 2 years after. The various acts that the troupe performs include tightrope walking, ball balancing and riding a rocking horse. Maruska, one of the troupe’s stars, can even do a handstand on Kuklachev’s palm.


2

The cat with etiquette

When Faye Murrell’s children left home, dining time became a lonely affair. So to have company at the table, she began giving her cat Tessa some table manners. The cat, a very quick learner, soon learned how to use a fork in no time flat. Not only that, but when noodles are served, Tessa can eat them with chopsticks, and when ice cream’s on the table, she uses a spoon.

1

Piano-playing cat

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TZ860P4iTaM

Nora, a gray tabby, who was adopted from an animal shelter by music teacher Betsy Alexander, became a media sensation after a video of her playing the piano went on to YouTube. Named after painter Leonora Carrington, she learned how to play by watching her owner’s students practice while she sits under the piano. Then one night, she went up the bench herself and started pawing the keys. With the encouragement of the owner, Nora’s playing became a daily routine, and her performances were soon posted on YouTube, and found its way to the media, where it called the attention of animal behaviorists, who find Nora an incredible case of animal intelligence. Her popularity made her an instant sensation, and she now has her own CD, DVD and website.



  • Junior

    Funny and interesting list.

  • tremblingfingers

    Cuteness!! My Monday is less doomed now. Thanks mjdolorico!

    -the crazy cat lady-

  • Davern

    Faye Murrell is beyond crazy. That was a shameless attempt to be invited onto Oprah.

  • Firefly

    Heehee kitties :D My parents have three – one (Bill) who ‘talks’ to birds. He can be found sitting in the garden or a window watching birds and giving out to himself as they fly around. Persephone likes to pick the food out of the bowl with her paw. We had another one, Casey, who liked Radiohead. He’d come into my room and purr when I put them on.

    Also, what about polydactyl cats? Cats with thumbs. We better hope it doesn’t become the norm or we humans are f*cked.

  • Julius

    I can has cheezburger? :-) cool list…

  • VP

    Meow wow list.

  • Po

    Definitely need a link for Nora playing with her orchestra :)
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zeoT66v4EHg

  • Charlotte

    Woohoo! Go cats!

  • Greg

    What, no keyboard cat?

  • Lala

    wow. I’m not a cat person, but I found this list very interesting and different.

  • 7raul7

    LOLcats :-)

  • astraya

    Instead of the cat o’ 9 tails, we get the 10 tales o’ cats.

  • bluesman87

    I just face palmed myself so hard i lost Consciousness , a cat radio station ? Thats the seventh seal ,the degradation of western society at it most retarded . Id expect that from japan but the west ? Why? Why god do i have to listen to miley cyruss and justin beiber , but cats get their own radio station?!!

  • Mindymoo

    While these cats are awesome, my cat could blow any of these kitties out of the water, any day of the week.

  • ianz09

    [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZy2I8csVQU&hl=en_US&fs=1&]

  • Akashtorturedmind

    Interesting list! Didn’t expect something like ‘tales of cats’ but it was quite fun to read. By the way these fluorescent cats are damn cool! Wish i had one like that…

  • Dr. Ankita

    I just LOVE cats n so this list made my day :) keep such lists coming!

  • nuriko

    the funniest list I have read!!! XD

  • Holly

    My Favorite is the pink cat :P I hope he was not bullied by his friends ahah…

    Faye Murrell’s crazy.. I mean, what the cat does is cool, it’s obviously intelligent, but I don’t get why she’s all “my cat eats the most expensive food and wants to meet Tiger Woods and be a superstar”. WTF !?
    Are noodles and ice cream good for a cat, anyway ?

  • Lifeschool

    Cats can also quickly learn to use an Ipad:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9NP-AeKX40

    • dizit

      I’m going to get a cat just so I can get him to do that!

  • melnve

    Loved this list, thanks!
    That cat with the fork is a bit creepy though… the owner really should think about getting out more and making some human friends. Her husband is a patient man!

  • MChris

    Not as informative but rather funny and freaky at the same time:

    http://www.break.com/index/ninja-cat.html

  • i really *really* want a glow in the dark cat

  • oouchan

    Love the list! I visit the http://icanhascheezburger.com/ site everyday for laughs. I like the idea of having a cat with wings. Freak out the dogs.
    Missing the caption for number 6: “Ceiling cat is watching you masturbate.” :)

  • EVCunningham

    D’AAAWWWW

  • MChris

    @bluesman87 [13]: Concur! Definitely another sign of the coming apocalypse. What’s next, executive positions for cats in major companies? Oh wait, per #7, already happened! That’s it, to hell with work, I’m crawling into my bomb shelter today (right after I finish my coffee, guy’s gotta have priorities).

  • Lifeschool

    Wierd – that’s all I kept saying while reading and that’s all I’m gonna say now.

  • DiscHuker

    I love cats. They taste like chicken.

  • bluesman87

    @DiscHuker [27]: they got a slightly more “smoky” taste but im with what you sayin…

  • VintageObsessive

    in reference to the cat using chopsticks:
    “We thought it would be a good gesture since we we’re going to Korea.”

    RIIIIIGHT because Koreans will expect a cat to eat his noodles the same way they do? That lady has too much time on her hands and I’m surprised her husband puts up with that crap!

  • MChris

    @DiscHuker [27]: & @VintageObsessive [29]: Think they had it backwards, in Korea they use chopsticks for the cats not cats using chopsticks. Here we just need a fork.

  • undaunted warrior 1

    I had a siamese cat once ( they have blue eyes ) that I left with family while I was away from home for 5 days.

    When I got back I was informed that the cat had gone missing 2 days after I had left.

    The cat turned up 12 days later looking very scrawny and raggered, after a week it was back to Its old self after some TLC food and rest.

    Amazing that was 52 kilometers away.

    Enjoyed the list thanks.

  • Eoz

    I love cats but even I thought of these were somewhat silly (the radio station and the cat eating with a utensil), but there are far worse things in the world than indulging cat people!

    However… I’m pretty sure the kitten in the photo for #9 is dead. That’s depressing.

  • nicoleredz3

    I hate cats. But interesting article.

  • Al

    Nothing at all mysterious about the pink cat in Devon. The predominant Devon soil is a bright red clay. On a dry day the dust will turn any white animal pink. It used to happen all the time to our West Highland Terrier

  • betterthantheoriginalwally

    My girlfriend has a miniature cat which she doesnt think is too special – but I think that tiny pussy is amazing.

  • bluesman87

    @betterthantheoriginalwally [35]: is it also weird and facinating ? does it glow in the dark and do tricks ?

    if it eats with a fork i dont even wanna fuckin know…….

  • Ales

    Dogs rule!

  • GTT

    Some people just have WAY too much time on their hands… Cat radio? That´s just silly… And teaching a cat to eat with forks and chopsticks? That´s just… God, I dont think there´s a word for how completely absurd that is! That lady needs to get out more…

  • Carole

    Most of these are B.S.

  • General Tits Von Chodehoffen

    Its ok, I guess.

  • Arsnl

    @undaunted warrior 1 [31]: so you are amazed cuz your cat has legs??
    @bluesman87 [36]: a pussy that glows in the dark? That sounds serious. I wouldnt touch that.

    Ps i dont think it will be so hard for that cat to meet tiger since he’s really fond of pussies. Also the way it eats make me think of oliver twist.

  • Bloke

    Horrible list! Giving up on standards eh?

  • psychosurfer

    I love animals but hate people who assume them as humans, Table Manners Cat is so stupid that it is even disrespectful for the poor animal, it just makes me MAD.
    Besides, #1 was a big disappointment, I was expecting a Chopin´s Nocturne, at least!

  • psychosurfer
  • Tweekee

    Please don’t try to teach your cat to use the toilet. It’s not a good idea. What if they get sick or break a limb or when they get old? And then you can’t keep a good eye on how much poo & pee they do which is usually a good clue about if they are sick or not. Great list though. I love cats.

  • Arsnl

    @psychosurfer [44]: its amazing how much ones standards fall after 3h in the library studying physics.
    I laughed soo hard to that video :-(

  • TyB

    C’mon, ppl, lighten up! It was fun and it has cats :D I just found it a little bit irritating the glowing cats part. What’s the use of glowing cats? Instead of cloning freaks (said with all due respect to the poor cats), find a home to all those already living cats who need a family!

  • sochej

    This list is just further evidence that people who own cats are FRIGGING INSANE. I felt crazy simply reading the list. :P

  • theBOMB

    did you know that pussy is an informal name for cat? pussy is also an informal name for the female pudenda. do you know what they have in common? they love to be rubbed!

    nice list btw hope this gets 100+ comments too.

  • psychosurfer

    @Arsnl [46]: What do you mean? WRC cat is Top Notch ;)

  • inismor

    #1 not talented at all; no sense of rhythm, no idea of what a scale is, no dynamics: back to school, kitty.

  • Pan Pipe Dreams

    Cats are gay. You name me ONE cat, just ONE cat that can play the Pan Pipes. Oh, what’s that, you can? HA! In your dreams!

    In your Pan Pipe Dreams…

  • dopetype

    you know what’s weird.
    dog people?
    and how they love to get their face licked!! EEWWWWWWW

    like they wouldn’t let a human do that s why a dog of all animals. even cesar milan says it’s unacceptable. dogs lick their balls and vadge…humans dont even do that before kisses.
    and don’t even go on about how a dogs mouth is ‘super clean’ it’s gross.

  • Lifeschool
  • Caity

    @Eoz [32]: What, why???

  • I AM a dog person, but getting my face licked? Ewwww!
    Do you know where that tongue has been?
    So do I.
    So no way.
    However, when my kids were growing up, they loved cats, so we always had cats. I toilet trained the cats (not difficult at all, just lengthy and requiring patience). One of them weirdly, and to my eternal annoyance, drank from the kitchen faucet whenever it was running. It did not seem to matter that I would fling the cat from the kitchen counter each and every time I found him there getting his drink ( yes, there was ALWAYS a dish full of fresh water available), because he always went running at the sound of running water emanating from the kitchen.
    He was smart not enough to get off and hide if heard me coming toward the room bellowing “Drat that cat!”
    Either that, or he actually liked being flung.
    Who can figure out a cat?

  • I seem to have invented a rather odd dangling participle in my post @58…” He was smart not enough”…
    Makes me sound as if I was translating my comments from another language unrelated to English.

  • Arsnl

    @Lifeschool [54]: this video is clearly a fake. You can see that the so called “kitty” isnt saying “i am”.
    @dopetype [53]: you reminded me of the patty joke from good will hunting, the one with give us a kiss.

  • Holly

    Cat people live and die alone with their cats ^.^ Just joking… I love them too.

  • MChris

    @TyB [47]: Glowing cats is really a plot hatched by the dogs; we just think it was our idea. Makes it easier to hound them at night.

    @dopetype [53]: “…humans dont even do that before kisses…” Are you sure? Are you very, very sure? :-0

    @psychosurfer [50]: Agreed, WRC cat rulz!

  • Lifeschool

    @Arsnl [59]: I’m a little confused here, you mean you thought it was REAL? Oh, no, I get you. :D

  • Lifeschool

    @MChris [61]: I just had to laugh :D

    @segues [57]: I know! Isn’t it crazy how cats have free will too? It seems a very wierd way of getting attention, but it worked every time. Why are some dogs and cats, and birds, such little sods? Little punks trying to get away with some little crime they’ve managed to pull off without your slightest detection. And then BAM! You walk in. “What’s BEEN GOING ON??”, you quiz the animal unsuccessfully for a few moments, “Who’s done ALL THIS??”.

  • Bucketheadrocks

    I have watched/heard everything on this list because I love cats! I remember watching every episode of the cat show on animal planet… it was boring, but very cute!

  • mike

    this has gotten really low for your site, what the hell happened to all of the good content way back?

  • vaami

    Interesting or not, I still hate cats.

    Death to them all! Little bastards!

  • Casualreader

    Shortly after we got together, my wife and I travelled to Turkey in an open car and camped in a tent. One day, buying some meat, we noticed a tiny kitten mumbling away at some of the unmentionables cast away by the Turkish butcher. My wife must have +Ooohed and Ahhed+ too much, because somehow the kitten ended up in her sun-hat next time, and we were obliged to adopt it. Sorry, check – it was obliged to adopt us. The car and tent were his +territory+, no matter where we travelled. He considered himself human and had to be at our communication level. So he’d leap, then claw the rest of the way up us as if we were trees and perch on our shoulders like Long John Silver’s parrot. He invented games of hide and seek in which each one had to take their turn. You followed his rules … or else. We towed a small dinghy and he insisted on sailing with us. When we swam off it, to our astonishment he leapt into the water and swam with us!
    (He wasn’t a swimming Turkish Lake Van cat either.) Adventures were far too numerous to recount here. But when we got to Istanbul on the way home and stayed with our Turkish friend (who disliked cats!), our little +country boy+ had a problem. Firstly, he wouldn’t crap or pee indoors. His face when he held back was a picture. And we were in an upper-floor town appartment. There was a small potential +loo area+ outside, and we took him there. But the neighbourhood was full of big, streetwise, bullying toms, who (almost!) scared shit out of him. He found his own solution. Presumably using his nose, he detected the typical Middle Eastern hole-in-the-floor loo with foot placements, and we found him there next time with a look of exquisite relief on his face! He hadn’t needed tiolet training as above. Driving back across busy European roads was a nightmare, but we did it. Next we were faced with quarantine, which disgusted him so much he would scarcely communicate with us again until +freed+ from that prison. Sadly, we’d just moved into our new house, and although we kept him indoors for several days and tried hard to stay with him and accustom him to a fenced garden, he just disappeared for ever almost immediately after quarantine. We just hope he had a quick ending under a car, or ended up with appreciative foster

    Generally dogs make better companions on walks or on the road, but here was one big exception.parents.

    It was an interesting trip in other respects too. We chanced to meet a famous and much-travelled TV reporter, also travelling rough on holiday with his production team, and had a fantastic alcohol-lubricated barbie and tale-swapping session late into the night.

  • Casualreader

    Sorry, +foster+ and +parents+ got separated at the end there by a change of paragraphs.

  • TyB

    @MChris [61]:

    Hmm I think evil plotting fits cats better. Now that I think about it, maybe cats are mentally controling scientists to make glowing cats; then they will use those glowin’ “agents” to lure dogs to their death. Only a feline mind could came up with that :D

  • paparate

    The glow-in-the-dark cats were actually made for medical reasons! I think it was made to track certain genes…

  • Missyhelen

    Ice cream is definitely not healthy for a cat. In adults, any dairy ingested can cause digestive issues such as diarhea. It’s only healthy for kittens. I know, schocker :D

  • General Tits Von Chodehoffen

    I think Daniel Tosh said it best. “You know what’s better than a cat? Any dog.”

  • NiMur90

    Keyboard cat deserves a spot!
    Entertaining list, keep up the “tales” lists mjdolorico!

  • Karl

    Cats are cute!

  • re: ‘project acoustic kitty’ : “It involved inserting a microphone and transmitter with battery to the body of the cat, and wiring an antenna to its tail. The expenses used for the surgery and training were said to amount to 20 million dollars. ”

    –waaaait wait wait…you mean to tell me that….
    woah…wait, what?

    i am pleased to announce:
    oliveralbq’s grand 75% off sale–

    anyone who would like a battery and a small mic inserted under your cat’s dermis, and a wire taped to its tail, please send me a personal message

    i offer my services for an unbelievably low price of 5 million….save 75%!

    be the talk of your neighbourhood, it is guaranteed you will have the only cat on the block who cannot walk through an airport metal detector

    the wire is made of space age metals mined in the beautiful sangre de cristo mountians of new mexico, right here in america!

    great cconversation starter–
    but wait! thats not all…..

    your shipping and snowflake’s catnip are free!!!!

    training facilities on site

    dont hesitate — appointment times filling up quickly!

    if you dont call, your cat will never forgive you

    act now!!!

  • Casualreader

    Verb sap. for the +down with cats+ brigade:

    Cats rightly owe a lot of their traditional acceptance in many countries for elminating rats during former plague eras. That included ships’ cats. I’ve known dogs that were excellent ratters once rats were put up. But they don’t have the ability to hunt them in the night, or the patience and guile to wait, spring and kill. Nor do they have the same agility if they miss on the first pass. For the same reason cats are excellent controllers of the smaller rodents that also cause problems, and once used to take a big toll of vital human cereal crops.

    The main price we pay is their predation of a lot of harmless and often appreciated creatures. Even worse is where they’ve been introduced to islands and decimated the rare, endemic animals. That’s not their fault. It’s ours.

    O.K. Do you want me to list negative points of dogs now?

    Like humans, there’s good and bad in both.

  • Casualreader

    ADDENDUM

    My first second and fourth paragraphs in 76, also the last two sentences in para. 3 are rated: +Garfield Approved+.

  • Casualreader

    @ General TVC, 72,

    “You know what’s better than a cat? Any dog.”

    Can’t wait to see your +any+ dog that’s better at climbing trees than a cat. Or one that can top those nine lives with a tenth. Or can be dropped from a multi-story building and land on its feet better than a cat. Or can see in the dark better than a cat. Or dribble a ping pong ball better than a cat. Or has better patience than a cat. Or …

  • Casualreader

    continued.

    … buries its crap at all , let alone better!

  • EVCunningham

    @Lifeschool [56]: D’AAAAAWWWWWW!!!!

  • @Casualreader [78]:
    –i think its safe to say tits was probably tongue-in-cheek kidding, at least a little bit….

    daniel tosh is a comedian, not a zoologist

  • punkin

    What?! Where’s Keyboard Cat? He at least deserves an honorable mention.

  • Atheismo

    @bluesman87 [36]:

    I just don’t understand the fun in bashing Cirus or Bieber. My pre-teen daughter likes both of them. Do you know why, bluesman87? Because she is the demographic. I’m not the demographic. I don’t like either of them. I don’t listen to either them. You’re not the demographic. You obviously don’t like either of them. Don’t listen to either of them. Turn the dial. Don’t you find it shameful that you have to be told that?

  • Morning Meows and Meow Mixing Monday? hahah…

  • General Tits Von Chodehoffen

    @Atheismo [83]: God I hope he does not find it shameful because even when I was 12 I would have known they suck ass.

  • GTT

    @Casualreader [67]: Cute story, kinda sad ending though… Not a big fan of cats though… I´ll take a dog any day of the week! :)

    @Atheismo [83]: I´m with bluesman87 on that one… I find it shameful that their crappy music is on the radio at all. It should be limited to the Disney Channel and their official CDs so the rest of us (who prefer to not have bleeding ears at the end of a song) are not subjected to that drivel.

  • Casualreader

    @ oliveralbq, 81,

    I think it’s safe to say I was too!

  • @Casualreader [87]:
    –yeah … i thought of that right after i hit the submit button.
    one of the few times i wished there was an ‘unsend’ button..

  • Casualreader

    @ oliveralbq, 88,

    Yeah, know the feeling well myself. Sometimes long after the thing is up and printed out too! I.e. The +WTF made me write that+ syndrome.

  • boredsexratary

    I have two cats and one dog. The cats destroy the furniture, get into the garbage, scratch my kids (mildly), sleep in my dresser drawers (errgh, cat hair!), climb the drapes, walk on my car, and are the source of much dischord in my marriage. My dog lays around, snores, drools, greets us with waggin tail, cuddles with my kids, and eats all the crumbs the baby drops.

    But for all the grief my cats cause I would choose them over my dog any day. :) I love cats!…even though they’re assholes.

  • gambo

    no keyboard cat or cat stands on hind legs??
    what is this?

  • Mick Fleetwood

    [email protected] radio. true story: every time my cat meatwad hears the growl at the beginning of the song “Black Metal” by Venom she runs under the bed. Nothing else makes her do that, even when I try to imitate the growl.

    and Ive seen my cat Alien pee in the toilet before too

  • @Casualreader [89]:
    –i always just called it the ‘pull your head out of your ass fallicy’

    i like yours better

    –hello, my name is keith, and im a wtf-made-me-write-that -aholic

  • Beast Of Gevaudan

    @vaami [66]: Death to ignorant idiots like you instead. I hate people who hate cats.

  • Beast Of Gevaudan

    @General Tits Von Chodehoffen [72]: You know what’s better than Daniel Tosh and the people that agree with him? Cats and dogs.

  • Beast Of Gevaudan

    @boredsexratary [90]: In case you didn’t notice I love cats too, lol. Your cats wouldn’t be acting up so much if you tried using a little discipline when they were young. This goes for any pet. Common sense I know, but some people don’t use it.

  • Beast Of Gevaudan

    Entertaining list btw. No 1 was very cute.

  • tui

    that crazy hooha tied cutlery to her cat.
    Can you imagine the looks she would get from her husband?
    PLEASE!!

  • mjdolorico

    To those who were wondering why i didn’t include keyboard cat in the list:

    it’s simply because instead of nora, who learned to play the piano by herself, keyboard cat has the benefit of a human in playing the piano. While keyboard cat is funny, nothing can beat the, uh, pure talent of nora.

  • bluesman87

    @Atheismo [83]: dear madam/miss ( you obviosly dont have testicles) you are a bufoon , fuck you they suck -they only have 3 radio staions aimed at my “demographic” in my country( english white )they only play what i would call “shit” i dont have such luxurys of a metal or rock or blues radio stations . So i say again Beiber and Cyrus are the worst audio trash to ever be suffered by the human ear . And you are a gigantic soggy turd for chapioning their cause . Isnt is hsamefull that i have to point out what a fucking low life you are ? When i was 4 i had made my way thourgh the beatles and stones catalogs and was moving on to the doors . by 12 I had left hendrix and was moving back to john lee hooker , howling wolf . You do your offspring a great disservice she will probably grow up ignorant and saying things like “dawg” and “bitch” and perhaps the ever popular “ho” . How dare you attack me with sarcasm – you intellegence and taste defines you as the lowest form of human class – what i like to call “fuckass” . So again enjoy your bufoon music and ill keep listening to classic FM in hopes of hearing Beethoven because they cant play any other decent music fit for my ears . PS if i sound snotty and arrogant – my nuts are dry so feel free to suckle upon them suculently as i laugh in your face .

  • bluesman87

    @bluesman87 [100]: wait that is a bit of an exageration i had probly finished with the stones at age 8 .not 4 . and my balls arent that dry .

  • Atheismo

    @bluesman87 [101]:

    Yikes! An internet tough guy! I didn’t realize your social and/or professional status, Sir. I’m am so sorry for offending you, Mr. Bluesman87. Please don’t beat me up.

    I sincerely hope you’ll accept my apology and if you’re ever in Germany and want to get together for a beer, call me. I would look you up if I ever got to your country of english white (Is that one word or two? I couldn’t find it in any reference book.), but I’m not sure where that is or if I’ll ever travel there.

    Take care and stay tough!

  • bluesman87

    @Atheismo [102]: :( I read what you said and i have been thinking about it alot and you know what ? i thought – I agree with you . we are not the demographic . The music they play is aimed at tweens not me or you . Who am i to say that their music is good or bad ? Who am i to judge anybody who enjoys their music . Who am i to say their music is retarded ? Just because their music dosent appeal to me dosent mean its any less creative or inspiring to anyone else . Then i thought some more . And i realised its not their music i hate its me :( . Im just a fool in a tough guy shell and crazy mixed up kid with alot of anger inside . I thank you kind sir/madam for showing me the error of my ways . I need to be more mature and respectfull of all people.

    NOT!!!!!!!!!!

    Ps the offer to suck my balls is still a go.

    • Bluesman87's Dad

      Bluesman born in 87 huh? What kinda blues do you have at that age? Got the why did I get a web tattoo on my elbow blues? Or the I live in the Midwest and this place is boring blues? Whats with your ball fetish anyhow?

  • Casualreader

    @ oliveralbq, 93,

    Hi, Keith,

    Thanks, squire. I’ll lift the copyright then … but just for you though. Fans are few in this world and should always receive every encouragement.

    Afraid my overloaded work schedule only allows me the occasional pop into LV, and even rarer comment. As it is (like now!) I should really be devoting myself to greater priorities. But all work and no play …

    Anyway, I’ll keep an eye open for any interactives with you if the occasion arises.

    I’m Michael (preferred to Mike!)

  • Atheismo

    @bluesman87 [103]:

    However, I would say you received all the messages loud and clear.

    We’ll talk about the balls sucking when you get here.

    Tschüß! Bis dan!

    BTW – I loved the “NOT!!!!” joke! I remember them from the Borat movie when Cohen’s character was trying to learn them. He (Borat) was only a little bit better than you at using them. Keep practicing! “NOT!!!” jokes can be a very effective weapon in verbal sparring.

    Am I safe in assuming all is forgiven and you won’t beat me up?

  • Atheismo

    I don’t know, Casual. Banning music just because it doesn’t appeal to you? Sounds like dangerous ground. I’m stationed in Germany right now and their radio stations play a mash up of pop, R&B, rap (both kinds!), psuedo country (Twain, Swift, Urban, etc.), rock and techno all the time. It takes some getting used to; going from Eminem to Nickleback to Michael Buble and then to 50 Cent. There are very few stations devoted to one genre; in fact, the only one I can think of is a techno station out of Stuttgart. (It’s a blast to drive 220kmh down the autobahn listening to techno.) Perhaps there are genre-specific stations in/around Berlin? I don’t listen to the radio much when I’m there. Anyway, the kids here listen to the same stuff the adults do. Every once in a while, a Tokyo Hotel song will come on, but generally there’s no teenie/pre-teen music played. My kid likes Cyrus (got the spelling right this time!), Bieber and whoever’s next and I’ve bought (and will buy) all the albums on iTunes. She watches Hannah Montana everyday after her homework is finished. She goes to Lady Gaga concerts (NOT my idea!). What can we do? What should we do? Sure the music isn’t my music, but I’d rather she listen to Cyrus and Bieber than go to Lady Gaga concerts and listen to her talk about giving blowjobs (true story). Unlike 90% of the Germans, my kid actually understands the English, ya know? Besides, didn’t our fathers or grandfathers say almost the same about Elvis and the Beatles and Johnny Cash and whoever else wasn’t Glen Miller? Wasn’t this about cats and how “awesome” they are?

  • bluesman87

    @Atheismo [106]: you are safe im not coming to beat you up . and i am lame and lazy and got tired and bored . wateva .

    Jou gesig is a vuilig blooderig nat naai poes!!

  • @Casualreader [104]: “Thanks, squire. I’ll lift the copyright then … ”

    –much appriciated….at this rate, i’ll probably use it once a week ;)

  • @bluesman87 [108]:
    dude — did you just tell this guy to screw himself in africaans, then call him a dumb shit in german?
    hysterical….listverse shows its diversity once again, and the pissing contest is underway…..

  • bluesman87

    @oliveralbq [110]: nope . i said this is what dumb shit happens when you talk about cats .

  • bluesman87

    @oliveralbq [110]: i hope…

  • @bluesman87 [111]:
    –right on…..
    needless to say, living in mississippi, theres not really much of an opportunity to brush up on my german or africaans….
    i mean, i talk to my cat in german, but my cat is from alabama, so its usually a one way conversation.

    i mean—he says meow, but that doesnt mean shit to me unless theres no food in his bowl

    oh—and a side note: i tied a fork to his front right leg earlier, but evidently he is left handed because he just looked at me and said: ….get….this…fucking….fork…..off…of…my….arm

    sctually, he just said meow again, but he gets those imaginary thought bubbles so i knew what he meant

  • bluesman87

    @oliveralbq [113]: yeah i have no idea how to speak german and my afrikaans is pretty bad too, any way im all pissed out . I always argue when im hung over haha, but goddamn those freakin germans know how to use sarcasm ….

    My cat always like, comes up to you and shows you his ass ,i never knew what the hell he wanted so eventually i gave up and pulled his tail, dude he cant get enough of it even lets me carry him around by his tail.He can also speak zulu but all he does is insult my mother . “MOW”!! “MOW”!!! (zulu for your mother)

  • @bluesman87 [114]:
    –zulu? shit man, i need a south africa cat — my cat barely even speaks english
    but he is a amature meteorologist — when hurricane katrina hit us (i live right on the beach) he started running around screaming bloody murder, and kept running up and down the stairs…..about 3 minutes later the water came pouring in the door and seeping through the floor boards….
    now, if i could get him to cook…….

  • bluesman87

    serious ? hectic feline early warning system thats so crazy never been i a hurricane must be awesome to have like an alarm , i tried to teach my cat to cook but that stupid asshole always burns the steak , i dont know how many time i told him! he knows i hate tough steak! his signature dish “slimy dead bird on pillow” is pretty good tho…its subtle yet spicy. :)

  • @bluesman87 [116]:
    –it probably has to do with the barometric pressure being so low (waaay below normal the closer you get to the eye — which hit land about 15 miles from my house).
    of course, when your standing in your own living room with water up to your neck, ‘strange things cats can do’ gets lost in the chaos.
    *i* think elmo should be on the list in lieu of #7, which doesnt really have anything to do with the cat, but rather is just a testiment of how peculiar humans can be when bored…..

    oh–and train your cat to drop the bird on your grill, and tie tongs onto his legs — definately more impressive than tessa ‘the fork cat’ — he’ll be the next bobby flay

  • bluesman87

    @oliveralbq [116]: Hahaha yup Tessa sucks i wish someone would train a cat all hectic just to make her acheivments seem miserble and pointless

    Wow dude hurricanes suck! ! Im glad the worst natural disaster we have is drought every 30 years or so…

  • @bluesman87 [117]:
    –man, droughts suck…..hurricanes are fairly cool (as long as you dont own property)—-if i ever get a chance to post hurricane pix in one of the picture threads in the forums, i’ll let you know….you’ll trip balls… my favourite would be the the car upside down and cockeyed in the front door of the house across the street…. or the cats swimming in feet of water…..

    i stayed specifically to take pictures….
    i had no idea it would turn into a fucking extreme 9 hour swimming test

    **weird shit cats can do:**
    –catching fish in my living room

  • bluesman87

    @oliveralbq [118]: , the droughts where i am are pretty pussy actually(cant speak for the rest of the country) nature has my back here . Hurricanes sound mighty and shit :).The pics must be awesom tho ( if i see one coming im still gna run for my life .)

  • @bluesman87 [119]:
    –no need to run for your life, they arent tornados…
    in fact, although it was widely considered a boneheaded dumbass idea to stay within 225 yards of the beach for that particular storm, it was one of the most humbling experiences ive ever had — and note, if you are old, with child, cant swim (just in case you need to), etc … then get the hell out… otherwise..you arent gonna see that too many times in your life
    –not too mention a 35 foot tidal surge is not very common, so the likelihood that we get that angry of a storm again isnt very high

    –im gonna stay on topic, damnit
    **weird shit cats do**
    –my 9 year old cat was shadowing my 11 month old cat, and elmo would not let zuria move more than about 15 feet. as we had the outside door (the one upstairs) open to try and figure out if the water was receeding — elmo stood guard in the doorway, and wouldnt let zuria out at all (he wouldnt even let her near the door)… and he typically doesnt give a shit what she does.

    some strange category of altruism, with a twist?
    dunno
    ive asked him a few times and he wont tell me shit….

  • Jonathan Novak

    What about the cat that detects people’s deaths?

  • When the cat plays Moonlight Sonata I'll be impressed, as it is it's only twinkiling random keys out of fascination at the resulting sounds, this has nothing to with intelligence, but everything to do with a cat's inquisitive nature.

  • Sarena

    I am appalled over number 1. As a piano aficionado, the fact that this cat has a cd is preposterous. I have seen numerous animals, children, and adults perform the same feats on the piano. Number one is a despicable example of what cats can be capable of.

  • Awww… ^^

  • Forrest Greene

    A similar Cat Toilet-Training Method was developed by the late, great American Jazz composer & bassist, Charles Mingus. See:
    http://snipurl.com/27o6ns [www_mingusmingusmingus_com]

  • blablablablabla

    number 1 isnt that amazing, the cat was probably just like “ooh it makes noise!”

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  • undordgox

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  • woubowpam
  • #1 – Sure you can play the piano, but can you play Bach?

  • Abaggisee

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    • More damned SPAM!

      Why can’t all these SPAMMERS be barred from SPAMMING on LV?

  • Pcanjjaxdcd

    So That’s where Ceiling Cat originated!

  • Anythya

    my aunty taught her cat to go to the toilet in the toilet and to say i love you lol

  • Iluvcats

    If we can train the cats like puss in the boots this list is very interesting.

    • dizit

      uhhhh, wasn’t Puss in Boots an animated film? A cartoon?

  • errrka

    most kick ass list I’ve read on listverse, I want to use the litter kwitter. I think animals are much more aware and intelegent than we give them credit for.

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    Name

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  • fabgirl

    Firefly: LOL, if every cat had thumbs we’d be screwed!