Two years ago we published a humorous list of book titles you are not likely to see at your kid’s school. Because we have had a lot of fairly serious lists of late, it seemed like a nice idea to publish a second list today – and more specifically one which is fun. So, while you all enjoy today’s intellectual list, here it a little humorous interlude.
1
Books 1 – 5
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
2
Books 6 – 10
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
3
Books 11 – 15
11.
12.
13.
14.
15.
Bonus
This one is for real!
I am speechless.
That bonus is real?
Wow. Unbelievable.
I know. It’s such an incredibly sad story
Not to mention incredibly fake. The whole ‘satanic ritual abuse’ debacle that got kicked off with that Michelle girl was a steaming load of bull.
Cool list people should get these books in school
Cool list they should get these books in school
Nice list
.
Ha ha love it!
[deleted - read the commenting FAQ]
How about “Mind Control:The easy way to control your teachers and parents” The really covers it all! Great Work Jf!
Well, a list of pretend books that people did with a photoshop program is not that good.
One of the worst ones I have seen on this web page.
Wow, I must be getting old. I didn’t find any of those the least bit funny.
I'm 19 and I feel the same way. Except for the "getting old" part that is.
I loved it! I have a warped sense of humor so this fits right in. Nice list.
However, I am disturbed by the bonus since it’s real. Crazy stuff.
Also, scouts in bondage is a real book, if Cracked is to be believed.
Yeah, that bonus book… Frightens me really. Did you get these “banned books” from an email too J?
Edward Gorey….his books are sold usualy in the “humor” section…they are children’s books for adults.
The Gashlycrumb Tinies an alphabet book sit proudly on my coffee table. Each letter is the first initial of child who met an untimely death. Illustrations are awesome, he was the artist that did the intro for PBS’s MYSTERY! series.
I know I know that was kinda off but it’s what these “books” made me think of.
bad list
original content or research is nowhere
watch out for IAB watermark
god bless thou
The scouts in Bondage one is real I had it at my Primary school
lol drew bledsoe.
Yeah! A two-fer Friday!
I expect more from this site. Sure, it’s funny, but I can go to cracked for this. Which, it looks like, you got at least half of these images from.
JaffaAnonymous: I posted this list as a second list because it is not the type we usually do these days. If you don’t like it, read the first list of the day which is much more intellectual
I do not like it in a box
I do not like it with a fox
I do not like it in a house
I do not like it with a mouse
I only like it wid a ho
To me goin in the flow
invisible crocodiles? we are *****ed.
I need to find a copy of that last one, just for laughs.
My brother said What the ***** when we saw it at a barnes and nobles. I got the book for a birthday Prank XD
I didn’t even smile. Lame list
Most of those are fake.
I think that's the point–>satire.
Possibly the lamest list I’ve seen on listverse. Just sad.
If anyone finds a copy of the last one, it is your duty to scan it for all of us to see!
And @David (25): Yes, all of them are fake except for the bonus one, which is captioned “This one is actually real”.
The Scouts in Bondage book is real. It's in Bizarre Books: a Compendium of Classic Oddities by Russell Ash and Brian Lake.
who cares if they’re fake? they still get a smile out of ya
I’m lame.
Ahh, this list WAS refreshing! I just came out of the hell-hole that was the comments section of the previous list and found this to be a nice way to steer my mind away from all that. Thanks JF!
Check out the reviews for the bonus book.
http://www.amazon.com/Dont-Make-Back-Mommy-Childhood/product-reviews/0880703679/ref=dp_top_cm_cr_acr_txt?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=1
@Ziraphen (27): I wouldn’t be suprised if #7 was real…
Thank you, JFrater, I have been waiting for a humor list for a LONG time! But you could have done better. It wasn’t as funny as I expected, but it was good. But, considering how most of these were ‘shopped, I feel that you could have made your own. You REALLY missed out on BAJ references. And that reminds me, Bucslim would be a GREAT children’s book author!
Sorry for the long link. Here are a couple of pages from the book.
http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.joeydevilla.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/dontmakemegobackmommy3.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.joeydevilla.com/2009/12/11/the-worlds-most-terrifying-childrens-book/&usg=__vpc7EepmxJTAXAWgX1heP9S14g8=&h=442&w=500&sz=48&hl=en&start=17&sig2=mweAqIEpameu4bU2Qk4byQ&itbs=1&tbnid=IXBJDrw4BtjTnM:&tbnh=115&tbnw=130&prev=/images%3Fq%3DDont%2527%2Bmake%2Bme%2Bgo%2Bback%2Bmommy%26gbv%3D2%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DG&ei=-aNsS8beDpHWNKmtvNQE
the rifleman in #9 sure got wood. LMAO. these books are fake right? would have been very very useful if they’re for real. hahah. i’ve read #11 its true title is ‘the giving tree’
Umm, weird list. I have a sick sense of humour, and found some of these funny, but not all. Still, thanks. D
D=
@Blogball (34): Wow that is some strange *****.
My favorite children’s book is Curious George and the High Voltage Fence
Or how about Why Mommie’s Friend Susan Isn’t Married ? Or <Pop Goes the Hamster and Other Fun Microwave Games And don’t forget The ADHD Children’s Book of Fun Activ… Hey Let’s Go Ride a Bike
Hmmm.
Dr. Zeus could have totally made a great ***** book.
The one we had was the classic “Where Did I Come From?”
“Dad Found Me In A Mug Of Beer.”
or something along those lines
I showed my best buddy the book and he would ‘translate’-
“*****s.. pussy.. dick.. *****.. ect.)
He rang me one day when his parents were gone and I went over and he showed me his dad’s mega-collection of *****.
One day his mom made his dad throw it all out.
My buddy rang me soon after and we dragged a bag to the forest were we had built a fort.
Many after school days were spent at the forrest fort.
We set Commando/Rambo-style booby-traps surrounding the area.
Harpooned nosey Lisa one rainy November. Had to hide her remains by the tallest pine.
Took till it was dark. Nothing but sticks and a large rock to shovel out all the dirt.
Thinking back on it now.
I’ll never forget the smell of all those mildewing pages of *****ography when the frosty dew of morning melted by the warmth of the rising sun had had its way.
Too American.
while im reading this list, my younger sister told me that she saw book #11 in her school hehe
Fun Four letter Words to Learn and Share;
Kathy Was so Bad Mommy Stopped Loving Her;
Why Grampa Isn’t Moving;
The Smelly Comfy Chair and Other Gross Things Grampa Does to the Furniture;
OK am I Little Davey’s Dyslexic Workbook;
Grandma Gets a Casket;
Dad’s New Wife, Robert;
Where Mommy and Daddy Hide Neat Things;
Little Suzy’s Three Hours in the Dark Closet;
Your Nightmares are Real;
How the Chicken Bone Got in the Crib;
Why Mom and Dad Make You Wear Flammable PJ’s;
Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia…
(I am sorry all to hell)
I think this list would have been a lot better had it featured real kids books that were banned, with a bit of info about them. I’ve seen quite a few of these before, did you just rip them from Something Awful or some other humour site? If so, that’s pretty slack.
I seem to recall a game at some forum based on this exact premise….hmmmm.
As for the bonus item….now that’s just scary. As if there isn’t enough things for kids to worry about in their munchkin little worlds. Now let’s have some book out there to help conjure up some bedwetting nightmares.
What kind of publisher would see fit to run that one off the presses?
Nos. 7, 8, and 9 (less Pedo Bear) are real. Look it up.
Omg I can’t believe that bonus book is on here, we got that at a book sale for like almost 50 bucks a few years back. Couldn’t pass it up even at that price. They lady said some of them go for like around $100. My son has actually said “Mommy you read me this” the times we’ve gotten it out to show people. It’s awkward from there,but he’s three so I just distract him with something shiny. Loves it!
If only my school stocked a book about satanic ritual abuse, my life would have been so much easier! He he, great list!
First!
Second!
Pretty much a cracked photoshop list…
Awooo..what a cracko of a list
Sense of humour is always good. But I prefer real things that exists.
I’ve read all of these already…
Where can I get some of these. My three year old daughter is absolutely hopeless at rolling joints, she needs #15.
@DoomSai (54):
The bonus book is real, unfortunately.
Thanks for bringing this to my attention jfrater. Another example of how the religious (of all kinds) take themselves too seriously.
And the price they can make others pay.
About the entry #10, Butters taught me how to *****.
Hey I think I have some of those HAAHAHA